I think my mind just went haywire. Mate. He said the word mate. No, actually he said the word beloved which is the same as mate right? I’m his beloved or mate, he just said that. I know he said that. I’ve been spinning the thought around my head for about five minutes now and I must look like a malfunctioning robot because all I am able to do is to stare at him slack-jawed. Is he waiting for me to say something or is he just done talking? I don’t know what to do or say right now. If he just said that to mess with me, then mission accomplished. He revealed a lot of things last night, but this was not part of it. He definitely left this part out.
“Are you alright?” he asked brows furrowing with concern. “I- give me a minute to process this,” I answered before slowly moving away from him. Not that I wanted to put distance between us, I just can’t think straight when he’s near me like that. His hotness makes all rational thought disappear. A minute has gone by and I still couldn’t form words to say. It’s like I want to jump for joy and scream at the top of my lungs, but at the same time, the information was so unbelievable that I just didn’t know how to handle it. I’ve been hoping and praying for this to be true since the day I found out that he’s my mate and now that it’s out there, I’m truly stunned figuratively and literally.
“I understand that this is too much to take. I only wanted to let you know what you are to me. I do not want to sound arrogant, but I do know that you are attracted to me and as you now know, I am more than attracted to you. So, if you’ll have me even just for a while, then I would most certainly welcome that arrangement,” he said, pausing to make sure that I’m listening. “However, if the day comes that your true mate appears, I will not hold that against you. It will crush my soul, yes, but if I am not the one you are destined to be with, then I will willingly let you go. For your happiness that is,” he ended and it took everything in me not to cry at his confession.
He thinks my feelings for him are temporary. He thinks this thing is infatuation. He has no idea that he’s also my mate. Oh, wow! I’ve been so afraid to tell him everything thinking that he’s going to reject me only to realize that he feels the exact same way. The wolf inside me was celebrating and definitely hinting lustful intentions which I’m choosing to ignore right now. I need to tell him how I feel. I have to do it now because just like what Amara said, he has the right to know. “Actually, I... I mean you, you’re... This thing with you and me, this isn’t just a fling thing, like I find you hot so let’s date and fool around for a while kind of thing. I guess the point that I’m trying to make is you’re my mate. I've known since the magic thing covering your scent disappeared. So, I'm not just attracted to you. You're my beloved mate too or whatever,” I huffed suddenly feeling shy because of the way he’s looking at me, and to make things worse, he didn’t say anything back. He just sat there with a stoic expression on his face.
“Say something,” I whispered. I was about to shake him by his shoulders when he suddenly burst into a full-on throaty laugh. What the hell? “What’s so funny?” I asked slightly giggling at the sight of an old vampire rolling back and forth on the bed consumed with uncontrollable laughter his hands resting on top of his delicious abdominal muscles. “I’m sorry, I was not laughing at you. I am just completely shocked. I was absolutely nervous that you were about to run for the hills,” he said still half chuckling as he stood to take me in his arms. “The truth is, what you’ve said, has made me the happiest creature on earth.” Aww, I think my heart just melted.
Things got a little hot and heavy for a few minutes right after he crashed his lips on mine. We got handsy and grindy which had me going crazy. He caressed every part of me seductively that it had me returning the favor within seconds and if anyone thinks that vampires don’t get a hard-on, well think again. At some point, we almost bit each other. Him wanting to taste my blood and me wanting to mark him. It was straight-up animalistic, but aside from the full-on make-out session, nothing else happened. Make no mistake though, if he wanted to go all the way, I would have easily let him. I mean I let him fondle my breasts as much as he wanted to, so I was kinda disappointed when he slowed things down until we just ended up talking some more. The bastard is a tease.
I didn’t realize that it was already twelve in the afternoon since the room was absolutely dark with all the heavy drapes blocking out the sunlight. We both had to part ways for now, but he did ask if I can and wanted to spend another night with him once I was done with all the stuff I needed to do to which of course, I was more than happy to agree with. Storm and Amara won’t be back for another week which means I have to take care of the bar and other pack-related things. Once they come back, Eric will also let them know about everything that’s been going on with him since he believes that it’s for everyone’s safety.
I don’t know if it’s just me, but it feels like we’re about to face something big once again and this time it’s no longer about Amara. This time it feels like I'm going to be the center of this certain something. Everything just feels so ominous.