Soren - Heartbroken Goodbyes.
I can't stop myself from nuzzling my nose in her hair. My need to touch her, to feel her is at an all time high. "I'm a selfish bastard Zayla, but I can't be when it comes to you."
Feeling her hands glide up my chest she slowly pushes me away from her. "So what you think I'll just leave here today and just move on?"
"I need you too." I say while Dropping my head on a deep sigh.
"I don't want to move on, I don't want to love anyone but you." Her voice is hurt but laced with anger before it falters and panic shines through it. "Please! I spent my whole life fighting to be with you, to know you! fighting just to see you!"
I have never felt so defeated in my whole fucking life, id take a thousand deaths over having to live in this moment for another fucking second!
"For us to be together you have to die! You will be bound to hell forever! Can't you understand why I can't do this to you."
"My wolf betrayed me! He made me think he would keep you safe Zayla. I can't even trust my own wolf with your life! He's desperate to have you bonded to us forever. Desperate to keep you. So desperate that he's happy to kill you to make that happen. How can you expect me to be okay with this. " I say while Grabbing on to her face in a desperate attempt to get her to understand where I'm coming from.
My hopefulness that she will listen to me is cut short when she slaps my arms down. "I would be bound to the bottom of your shoe if it meant I can be with you."
"No! You don't even know what you're saying!" Where her tone was so sure of it's self and held frustration at my cowardice, mine was just that.... the voice of a coward.
But I'm a coward who would do anything to
Make sure she gets to live her life, I'm a coward who would fight my own father and heaven it's self to keep her soul in her possessions, At least until it's time. And her loving me is not time.
No matter how much she believes it is. "Yes I fucking do! I would give up everything to be with you!" She crosses her arms tightly over her chest. Even in her state of pure rage she's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.
Crossing my arms I mimic her stance. Cocking my eyebrow at her I spew my bullshit ass question that I know she can't answer.
"Even your family?" It's a low blow. Fuck I know it is but it's one of my biggest factors for why I refuse to
Take her life from her.
Her eyes widen and her anger shining on her face drops as her mind plays through what I've just said.
"Yeah that's what I thought."
Clearing her throat she looks more unsure than she had before. "I would miss them but it would be worth it. You are worth it."
I'm completely taken back for a minute before I explode. How could she ever think someone like me is worth more than everything that she is and everything that she loves.
"No it fucking wouldn't! Jesus fucking Christ Zayla use your fucking head!" I let out a aggravated sigh while throwing my hands into the air.
Grabbing onto her face once more I lock my eyes with hers, the calm grey in my eyes dulling to a dead black. "Nothing! Not one fucking thing! and not one fucking person is worth more than your soul. Especially not me!"
My tone comes out like venom is dripping from every letter, because I mean it. This fucking woman! This fucking queen before me has some fucking nerve acting like she's worth less than a piece of shit like me.
"You don't get to decide what's worth more to me Soren." Her tone comes out equally as deadly as she slaps my hands off her face, her beautiful blue eyes darkening to an almost purple tint as her wolf pulls forward. It's anger bleeding with hers.
Sighing out I kiss her on the forehead before walking to my dresser throwing on some cloths. "Maybe not, but I get to determine my part in it."
I can't bring myself to look at her. I'm so ashamed of myself that I just quietly get dressed. My head lowered in my sadness the whole time.
When I slide my shirt over my head I feel her soft hand touch my spine. The tingles from her touch have my whole body shivering and my mind ready to bend to her every whim. "Where are you going?"
"I need to think. I need to figure out a way out of this. My father has to know." I don't even turn around. I can't! I know I will be tempted to give in.
But she doesn't care about how little self control I have. No!
Grabbing onto my body she turns me around to face her, her dainty hands clasping onto my face "Soren please don't leave me." Tears swirl and rain from her beautiful eyes.
"Fuck. I'm going to fix this Zayla. And when I do I will come back to you. I promise." Latching my lips onto hers I pour every piece of heart break I'm feeling into this kiss, and so is she. This isn't a forever goodbye. Fuck no! This is a I'm sorry, and I will see you later.
Swirling my tongue around hers once more, I can't help but taste the saltiness of her tears. Pulling away I kiss around her face. Her eyes and nose and every part of her beautiful face as I can. Burning everything touch to memory.
"I love you Zayla. I will see you soon my beautiful Lux."
Backing away slowly I walk into a portal watching it slowly close in front of me, her face the only thing I see until I'm surrounded in darkness.
"I love you more Soren." Softly floats through the air around me.
I will fucking figure out a way to allow her immortality with out causing her death. She might not hear my vow, but all of hell and purgatory combined can sure feel it.
Staring at the spot where my beautiful Lux face has just stood I feel a hand on my shoulder. Turning around I spot my brothers standing there with pitied looks.
"We have work to do." Walking past them I head straight to the person who should have the answers I seek.