I wake up to the smell of breakfast. I open my eyes and look around the room. I didn’t get a chance to because of how tired I was. The room has orange couches in front of the bed A bathroom off to the side and an open window looking out to France. I can see Cain is sitting there shirtless with a teacup in his hand looking out the door. He looks more peaceful here. Maybe it’s because of the gorgeous view or the fact that today we’re going to get one of his Loyal. Either way, his curly brown hair shines and his green eyes seem to look brighter. His chest looks more defined and I shamelessly ogle him.
“Are you going to continue staring or would you like some breakfast?”
“Both.” I boldly said.
I see the corner of his mouth twitch. I grab a robe that is lying on the bed and slip it on. I’m still only in my panties as I walk over to the empty seat and sit down. The balcony looks out into a beautiful view. There is a table in front of the lounge chairs with different plates of food. I fill my plate up with the foods I like and begin eating.
“Good?” he asked.
“I didn’t know what you like so I had the chef prepare everything.”
I nodded. “I’m not a picky eater. Though I should warn you, Cynthia is a hardcore vegan. Nothing from animals goes in or on her body.”
He takes a sip from his cup before setting it down. I look inside it to see that it’s tea.
He laughs. “I know. I heard her giving my chef a lecture.”
“Chef? You just came back to earth a few weeks ago. How do you have all this?”
“Adelaide made some investments that turned out good for me. Plus Hell used to pay very well.”
He gets that look on his face whenever he talks about Hell.
He shakes his head. “I can handle anything Lilith throws at us.”
“What about Lucifer? Won’t he be gunning for us?”
“Lucifer can’t be bothered to run his own kingdom. He won’t give two shits about me getting my Loyal back.”
“You never did tell me what got you sent away.”
He doesn’t say anything for a few minutes before he sighs and leans back in his chair.
“I had sex with Lilith.”
I almost choke on my bacon. “I’m sorry, you had sex with who?”
“Lilith. Lucifer and Eve have a toxic relationship. When Adam died Lucifer moved Eve to Hell. Lilith had a big fit so Lucifer gave her the keys to the kingdom to shut her up. When I found out Eve was getting back with the man who did this to me I didn’t take it too well. They had a party to celebrate their union together and I got drunk. So drunk I fucked Lilith and he caught us.”
“Why did he even care?”
“Lucifer is a man who no one can resist. He can charm anyone. He made it his game to get with Eve as a little fuck you to God. Eve fell in love with him and then he dumped her because she was pregnant with me. That’s when she became cruel to me because I reminded her of Adam. Adam was a good man and she treated him like shit. He stayed with her despite everything she did. He loved her with everything he had. Getting back to your question, Lucifer’s status in Hell means everything to him. Even though he gave Lilith his crown demons would easily stop following her if he told them to. He gets off on that kind of power. When I fucked Lilith’s he saw it as a power move. A move that couldn’t be ignored. He gave Lilith a choice. Either she makes Purgatory or loses her crown. And you know of course which one she chose.”
“What an a-hole. His ego was crushed that bad that he locked up his only son? I mean what you did wasn’t right but still.”
“Lucifer doesn’t care that I’m his son. And I’m probably not the only one. He probably has millions of kids running around.”
“Wait like half Lucifer kids running around? ”
I blew out a breath. “Those kids are probably really strong than right?”
“Yeah if Lucifer would let them have powers. He would never let someone challenge him if they could match his own. The only reason he allowed me to live was that I balance Hell.”
“I remember you telling me about that. How do you balance Hell?”
“When Eve had me she created a tip in the scale.
“How do you even the scale?”
“My monster. Putting that thing inside me evened the scales. I don’t know the whole history of it but me staying alive is the only way everything stays even. I was allowed to live on earth because the monster hadn’t awoken yet. It wasn’t until I was sixteen that it took over me. That’s when I killed my brother. When I was sent to Hell everything got better and I was able to keep my monster tame because there were always souls in Hell to be killed. That’s how I found Keri and I decided to leave Hell. Lilith put the curse on my monster to keep it at bay and in exchange I kill for Hell. I had a pretty good life outside of Hell until I messed it all up with Lilith.”
“No offense but you’ve had the worst childhood I’ve ever heard.”
He laughs. “It wasn’t all bad. In the beginning, I had a happy childhood. At first, it was just Eve, Adam, and I in Eden. It was beautiful. The most beautiful place you could imagine. Everything you want is there. No pain or hunger. I was never angry or sad. It was perfect. After we were forced out we moved to earth. We rebuilt our life the best way we could. Later they had Abel and Awin. They were so beautiful Elsie. When they first let me hold Abel, I was scared I would somehow hurt him. Even at such a young age, I felt unworthy to hold someone so pure. Even without my monster I somehow knew what I would become.”
“What is your monster like?”
“My monster is me. He looks like me and talks like me but he isn’t the whole me. Just the darker parts. The parts I try my best to hide. I can always feel him waiting for me to slip up and lose control. It’s much harder to control it now. When I was in purgatory I had to let him out to survive. He got the freedom he wanted and he will always crave it.”
“What would happen if he ever got out?”
He looks at me and true fear is in his eyes.
“Death, destruction. Whatever he can get his hands on. Every day is a new battle.”
“Isn’t there a way to remove him from you?
He shakes his head. “No. I’ve tried everything. Learning control is the best way to keep him inside of me.”
“You can’t do that forever. Being in pain like that. I felt it, Cain. That pain is something no one should carry with them.”
“I’ve been handling him for a long time.”
“I could help you. If I could find your Loyal then helping you with your monster should be a piece of cake.”
“I appreciate that Elsie but my monster is something no spell can fix.”
“Are you sure? I could-”
“Leave it alone!”
I almost fell out of my seat from the expression on his face. His eyes flickered and his breathing was hard. When he sees the fear in my eyes he pulls back and takes deep breaths before looking back at me.
“I’m sorry Elsie. Talking about getting rid of him while he’s so close to the surface is not a good idea. Leave it alone.”
I nodded numbly and got out of my chair. I suddenly lost my appetite. Cain calls my name but I ignore him. I grab an outfit out of my suitcase and walk into the bathroom. I close and lock the door behind me. I set the clothes on the counter and look into the mirror. I wrap my braids up in a bun so they don’t get wet while I’m showering. I strip out of the shirt and panties. I turn on the water and wait for it to get hot. When it’s at the right temperature, I step in and let the water pour down my body.
The way his eyes looked. I’ve seen those eyes when he’s angry but I had barely said anything and it was like he couldn’t control it. Maybe it’s already coming forward. Cain’s right though. I need to leave it alone for now. I wash my body and step out of the shower. I dry off, lotion my body, and put on the clothes for today. I’m wearing a black Nike shirt and leggings.
I let my braids out of the bun and put them in a ponytail. I leave the bathroom and see Cain is sitting on the bed.
“Elsie, I’m sorry. I freaked out on you.”
“You can’t keep apologizing and expecting me to forgive you. I understand about not being in control. It’s something that I’ve been living with all my life. But I’ve never taken it out on other people and you shouldn’t either.”
I put on my socks, shoes, and start to walk to the door. Cain grabs my arm. “I know. Talking about my monster is something I’ve never done. I’ve never even talked about it with my Loyal. Thank you for trying to help me but there is nothing you can do.”
I nod, not knowing what to say.
“I’m going to get dressed,” he said.
I walk out of the room to let him get ready. I walk around the penthouse until I find Cynthia, Patrick, and Mira all sitting in the living room. The rest of the penthouse is just as gorgeous as the bedroom. I have no doubt he or Adelaide hired an interior designer. I take a seat across from Patrick who is eating a plate full of Canistrelli. I remember eating them once when I came to France a couple of summers ago. Mira is grinning about something on her phone. She’s been doing that since we left home. I’ve never seen her so happy. Maybe it’s a guy? And Cynthia is finishing off a plate of French toast.
“When are we looking for one of Cain’s Loyal?” Cynthia asked, with her mouth still full.
Mira looks up from her phone to look at her in disgust.
“Lilith hid Pierre’s coffin somewhere in Paris. When Cain and I combined our magic, I saw images of drawings and crystals. I think Cain knows exactly where it is.”
We all turn around as Cain stands in all his glory. His hair is still wet from his shower and he’s wearing all black, it’s more casual than his suits. He takes a seat right next to me and I can’t help but breathe in his cologne. I have to rub my legs together to help with the ache I feel. I wish he didn’t have this effect on me. Every time I’m near him, I just want to forget about everything going on and focus on him.
“Pierre used to tell me stories about his mum taking them to see the crystals. When she died, he buried her there. He let me visit with him a few times. It’s not far from here. ”
Cynthia jumps up. “Then what are we sitting around here for? Let’s go.”
We follow Cain to his garage below the building. Turns out he owns the whole building. We all pile into a black SUV. I sit next to Cain in the front seat while Patrick, Mira, and Cynthia sit in the back. As Cain drives, I’m taken back to the memories when I went to Paris for the first time. I think it has to be one of my favorite vacations with my parents. When this is all over, I’m going to look for dad and I’m not giving up this time. When Cain parks the car at the place, I don’t know what I was expecting but the piles of a destroyed building wasn’t it.
“What the fuck?” Mira said, voicing my thoughts.
“Is he under it?” Patrick asked.
Cain closed his eyes for a few minutes before opening them. “Yes.”
“How the hell are we going to get through all that? I’m not digging through dirt for a guy I’ve never met.” Mira complained.
I roll my eyes. “Maybe we should have bought shovels. Or a construction crew.”
“We don’t need it,” Cain said.
“Then how are we going to get through all of that?”
Cain looks down at me like it should be obvious. He can’t be suggesting to me?
“I can’t do that.”
“Yeah, she can’t. Unless she all of a sudden developed telepathic powers.” Mira laughs but no one else does.
Cain ignores her and walks behind me. He puts his hands on my waist and leans down to my ear.
“You can do this Elsie.”
I can feel his silky hair on my cheek and smell the mint toothpaste he used this morning.
“Close your eyes and think about moving it. Feel each piece moving for you. You are in control Elsie. Remember that.”
I close my eyes despite the feeling of doubt. I’ve never been able to move anything with my powers i don’t know why he suddenly thinks I can now. I try anyways because stranger things have happened. I do as he said and imagine moving piece by piece. I feel something inside open up. I hear a few gasps but ignore them as I focus on the task. For once I feel in control. Maybe it has something to do with Cain’s hands on me. As I reach for my magic I feel darkness deep inside me. A darkness that I have no intention of touching but I can feel it there wanting me to tap into it, wanting me to give in. I should. I should give into that beautiful darkness and bring ruins in this world. I should reach inside and unlock the power that I was born to have. It’s mine as is this whole world for the taking. I try to reach for it but a voice stops me.
My eyes open and I see that all the destruction is gone. The only thing left is a tomb with shining bright crystals inside. Cain’s is still holding me as I take in everyone. Everyone but Cain looks scared or more like worried
It’s Cynthia who answers. “You were glowing Elsie. A black mist was around you, It was pushing out of you. We felt like we were suffocating.”
A black mist? Was that the darkness I felt?
“I’m sorry I didn’t realize what I was doing at the end. I just felt its power.”
Cynthia nods and gives me a tense smile. Patrick looks wary and Mira looks fascinated. I take a step back from Cain to breathe a little. What was that? I’ve never felt that darkness inside of me. What scares me isn’t that there is a darkness inside of me but how good it felt to tap into it.