Lucifer's Hope

I'm finally sat down after another monotonous day judging the recently deceased souls waiting in purgatory, the process has left me feeling drained of energy. From fifty newly arrived souls thirty-seven are to be taken to Hell! Thirteen eligible for the pearly gates. It pains me that humanity is so vile and unworthy of the lives they are given, so greedy and disgusting...so many of them are given too many chances to live, given a life in order to do right and yet they get it so wrong. I sigh and my heart feels heavy when I think of how many unworthy souls are given another chance and yet still end up here...Three chances for them to do good and so many, too many, fail and arrive here to be punished for eternity. I connect my mind with Wyot, my long-time companion, that thirty-seven souls are to be processed and sent to the appropriate levels for their eternal stay...I can feel his disappointment before I let the connection go. I know he feels the same as I do regarding these damned souls, I have grown close to him over these many years.

I still remember when I first met him, he was yet another departed soul awaiting judgement in purgatory, sat alone with his sword drawn yet the tip had been sunken in the ground. I couldn't get any other defining features from him due to his armour and helm, but he was seated on a hollowed log with his head bowed, as if in prayer. Intrigued I moved and stood before him, my shadow casting over him alerted him to my presence and he looked up towards me, his eyes might have been dark but with the helm still in place it was difficult to discern, but I felt a sorrow in their depths. Another intrigue.

'Am I dead?' He had asked, never in all my time as ruler of Hell and the judge of the departed have I spoken to the waiting souls in purgatory, there was never need, I only needed to put my hand to them to see their sins in life and judged if they could get eternal bliss in Heaven. It was my curiosity that found me sat beside him on the hollowed log.

'Yes, you are dead' Lying holds no value in this place and I was still curious about this knight with so much sorrow.

'What is this place?' He barely looked around, but I imagine he must have had time to explore a little before he took to...praying?

'Purgatory, or limbo, the void whichever name you prefer, It is where souls come to be judged.' He was silent for only a moment before he stood, removing his helm and placed it by his sword, it reminded me of a grave.

'Are you my judge?' I could not say if he was nervous or afraid. If he was, he hid it well, or perhaps he just no longer cared.

'I am' He looked towards me then, stance depicting bravery, I found I respected it.

'I am ready' I already knew this and without further delay I stood to meet him and placed my hand on his shoulder, his eyes keeping with mine the entire time.

My touch found him a sinner and was surprised I was disappointed at the fact, however there was more. I was able to feel his strength, not just physical but of mind. His loyalty was also strong also, but his heart was dark, a taint of evil wrapped around it. It felt wrong in him and looking closer I found that it was not his own evil, but the evil of others that he had killed. Going from his armour it was no surprise that he had killed, but he had remained pure of heart to kill only those that deserved it. It was a rarity, most others in his position take pleasure in the slaughter of others. Looking closer I was able to see the origin of the sorrow I had felt in his eyes and felt his own sorrow and anger rush through me as I watched his beloved be slaughtered before his our? eyes, I felt his despair knowing that he could only watch helpless as he was tied unable to go to his wife and unborn child as they were brutally murdered. I felt the pain, almost numb with grief running through the knight's veins as he was run through with the sword that still had his beloved's blood tainted on it.

I pulled away sharply, I had seen enough and was stunned that he did not feel more anger, only endless sorrow at his loss. Most others would be burning with the need for revenge. I moved to sit again and he wordlessly followed, probably awaiting his judgement. We were both quiet for some time, he appeared to be waiting patiently while I was processing what I had witnessed before I made a decision, choosing to do something I had never done before, I turned to him and told him who I was and told him he had a choice.

He asked if he went to Heaven would he see his beloved and child.

'Your wife yes, your unborn however will be granted another life and sent back to earth' He nodded at the news and turned to his sword in thought, silently processing my offer. After a while he stood up again, stance strong with pride.

'I accept your offer, L choose to help you punish the evil in this world' I let myself smile at the proclamation, perhaps he had some lingering thoughts of revenge after-all. Shaking off the thought I stood and held my hand to him which he took firmly.

It has been so long since that day that I can't remember how many years have passed, but his loyalty has remained strong, as well as his sorrow which I have felt grow with each passing day when there is more souls that require punishment than ones that are sent to Heaven.

As I'm sitting here I feel a presence I've not felt in a long time...My blood begins to heat immediately when I sense him next to me "Father" I turn to see him as he appears beside me. He's opted for a suit today, looking like an old businessman, black slacks and blazer with a white shirt and blue tie.

"My Son" Argh! his voice pierces my mind, I hide my pain and shout instead.

"NO! You will speak to me in words not in my head" not holding back my anger I can feel it coursing through me.

"Very well my son" He spoke calmly. Infuriating me with his indifference. He proceeded to remove himself from my side and headed towards my leather sofa and sat down. He seemed surprisingly tense with his elbows resting on his knees and hands clasped together. I can feel my anger rising while I wait for him to get to the purpose of his visit.

He shows up for the first time in fuck knows how long for what?! He's left me here for years doing his dirty work all because his humans are flawed. For what purpose?! I am sending more of his precious souls to Hell then to Heaven and getting nothing in return. Not a thank you, no praise, and no help. I have to do it all on my own and get nothing!

"What do you want?!" My patience has run out with his continued silence.

"I know that you are angry My Son"

"Angry. Angry?! You have no idea how angry I am! I have done all that you have asked of me and my world is full of your precious human souls. They are flawed, disgusting, greedy, evil and vile and yet you still love them! Fifty souls departed today and you only receive thirteen of them back! Do you have any idea what these disgusting humans are doing to each other? Do you want to see what I see everyday? The murder, the carnage, the depravity, selfishness and greed? No! because you can not bare to think about it, and I hate you for it."

I'm stood over him as I finish my rant. My wings are out, my blood is on fire and it's coursing through my veins and my wings. My eyes follow him, I flare my wings in warning as he approaches me. There is no hesitation as he touches my shoulder, like all my hate and anger can't touch him...and maybe it can't as I feel the fire in my veins ebb and cool. After all this time he still has the power to cool my fire and with it I feel my rage slipping through my fingers. I back away from him before hi calms it completely, I feel my fire return a little with the distance, he will not manipulate me, he needs to see I am not what I was. his hand remained in the air for a moment as if reaching for me, and he lets it fall to his side with a sigh. He turns to sit back down and I walk to my desk dematerialising my wings before I sit down.

"Please My Son. We need to talk" I'm so tempted to tell him no, to have him leave and never bother me again...but something is telling me that what he has to say is important.

"Fine, I will listen to what you have to say" Trying to keep the disdain in my voice, which is hard with the damn effect he has on me. He returns to his tense posture from before and I keep my glare on him, so I don't show him how curious I feel. He looks at me with a serious face.

"I need to tell you something and you need to let me finish. Then there is something I need to show you." Hi s face is serious as he waits for my response.

I sigh. "Okay"

"My Son. I am very proud of what you do for me. I do know it's not easy for you and it's a great burden on you I know. As you know the souls that are returned to me are given another life to live on earth. Some come back to me and some come to you. I gave you a three limit on lesser evils to try again, but in Heaven my maximum is ten lives. Most come back to me and only a handful have been given a maximum of ten. They have lived their lives right and have experienced much. But there is one soul that is on her last life, her name is Hope. She is the one I'm here for. All the souls that come back to me get a little duller over time, even the ones that live ten lives are a little less brighter. But this soul is as bright as the first day she was created. A few years back she went through something very bad, and she ended up in a coma. I went to her to take her to Heaven as she had been through enough. Even though it was not her time, my sorrow for her was strong. But what I saw changed my mind. Her soul was still bright, I couldn't believe it. She is the only one that has never dimmed. Even after what she just went through, I had expected it to have dimmed just a little bit. But it was just as bright, strong and pure as the first day she was created. I knew then what I needed to do. I placed my hand on her soul and thought of you My Son. Your light is fading and darkness and anger are taking a hold on your heart. She is your light, she will take the darkness away and will calm your anger. When I touched her soul I made a connection for you two to be together for eternity. This is my gift to you My Son. You have one year to touch her heart, she needs to love you unconditionally for her to be by your side. In one year her life will be over and if she doesn't love you and will not stay with you she will come to Heaven for eternity. I can not give her another life My Son. she will be drawn to you on a physical level and you to her, but it is your heart she must love."

He walks over to me and says "Let me show you" and places his hand on my head. I close my eyes and I see her soul. it is truly beautiful, so bright, so pure. Then I see the torture she suffered, the brutality of it, the scars on her body from being cut over and over, her beautiful face crying in agony.

It's too much, I pull away and notice I'm crying my head full of those images. I have no words, my anger is rising, my blood is boiling, my rage is clawing to get out. I feel my father's hand on my shoulder to calm me down. He looks me in the eyes and says "She is special and she needs you as much as you need her. I hope that with this woman with her pure heart and soul you can find your inner peace and happiness. Please forgive me for all my mistakes, and please believe me that you have my love and you always will. Even though you no longer love me. Goodbye My Son."

"Father wait"

He turns to me and I put my hand on his shoulder. As much as I want to say I love him I can't. I've felt nothing but anger for him for so long. My emotions are all over the place from everything he has told me and shown me. He looks into my eyes and I see his love, his pride, his sadness in them.

"Thank you Father" it's all I can bring myself to say.

He nods his head and vanishes.