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Chapter 15: fights and flashbacks


Time flies when you're having fun and with Olli, I was having a lot of fun. He told me a lot of stories and jokes and I felt like I could let my guard down around him. I don't let my guard down easily, well not in the last year. It's been hard, but this week felt like a ray of sunshine in my dark clouds.

Everything was fun and easy, even the flight. But when we landed it felt like a dark cloud came above me. Olli called the Alpha to notify him that we were on our way, only to be told that I wasn't welcome. He even called me a sl*t! He didn't even know me tsssss.

"I'm sorry Maddy, I didn't know he would act like that" Olli says in a sad voice.

"Hey it's not your fault you have a grumpy Alpha. I mean he is lucky he is, otherwise I would kick his ass for being so disrepectful. I know he is your Alpha, but what a twat!"

"Yeah, my brother is kind of a egghead" Olli shrugs

"Wait, What? The Alpha is ..."

"My brother" he shrugs again

"Ow I didn't know, I am sorry" I feel a blush creeping up my cheeks.

"haha, but I'm not. Yeah he is my Alpha AND my brother, but he also is a grumpy egghead. When you get to know him he isn't so bad"

But because he was the Alpha, Olli couldn't bring me with him. He did however find a small B&B close to town where I could stay. It wasn't anything fancy or luxurius, which made it PERFECT for me. The lady that run the place was old and kind. Her grey hair was in a loose knot that bounced around while she walked up the stairs to show me the room. Olli had already left, he didn't want to upset the Alpha even more. So I am alone in the room. It's cute and cosy. In the middle of the room is a kingsized bed with a grey spread. Their were a lot of wooden accents and the smell of vanilla filled the room.

I let myself fall on the bed, I was exhausted from the trip and I had a headache. I don't really know why. It felt like something was pushing from the inside. Maybe it's my wolf? I hadn't spoken to her in a year. After I rejected Tobias, my wolf was angry and hurt. She ignored me and I wasn't able to shift. Maybe I never will be able to shift, ever. Maybe that is my punishment for rejecting my mate and taking the easy way out.


I hear a knock on my hoteldoor. I don't need to open it to know it's my brother. Still I open the door, we need to discuss his Gamma challenge tomorrow.

When the door opens I see a freshly showered Oliver standing in the hallway. He looks a little ... annoyed.

"Hey Oliver"

"Hey" he says, not looking at me while he passes me and enters the room.

He stands there in the middle of my room, I can see something is bothering him. But he should just spill it! As long as he doesn't I'll just talk about what I want to say. I know my brother, pushing him doesn't work.

"So .... about tomorrow, they gave me the two selections for your challenge. It's ..."

"You know you are an ass right?" Olli asks suddenly. I was a little taken by surprise.

"uhm, what's wrong?"

"What is wrong is that I just had to bring my friend to some small B&B because you are acting like a bully! You know she could hear everything you said, right?" He barks at me

"And you think I care?"


"Oliver, you know I only do this to ..."

"Yeah yeah, to protect me because what would my mate think if she found me with another women blah blah" he says while he falls on my bed. Aparently he is calming down.

"Not only for YOUR mate. What if her mate finds you with her. Males are very, possesive and he would rip your head off where you are standing" I tell him in a calm voice.

"I know, but she doesn't have a mate"

"Yeah, maybe not now but ..."

"No, she doesn't have one. She rejected him because ..." Now it was my turn to cut him off.

"WHAT? She rejected her mate. What kind of psyco does that?"

"You don't know the story. Look ..."

"I don't have to know the story", I bark at him, "We need to focus on your challenge tomorrow"

Typical, he probably forgot why we are here.

"NO! I need to focus on my challenge, you just stay here. You didn't want to see Maddy, well guess what? She'll be there tomorrow to cheer me on" And with that he jumps from my bed and walks away, slamming the door behind him.

I sigh, what's wrong with him? I just hope he'll focus enough tomorrow and not let that girl get into his head.

Pffft what kind of person rejects their mate. What, wasn't he good enough for her? These kinds of wolves deserve to burn in hell.

I let myself fall down on my bed. Immediatly images of Selena dance in front of me. I try to push them away, but they keep coming.


We got a mindlink from the patrols, their was a rogue sighting and they tried to break through our barriers. I was about to turn 21 and take over the pack so I felt a lot of pressure. There was a warrior team on the spot and my father and I were on our way.

The team had to try and contain the danger until we got there. But aparantly the rogues were very agressive. So if the danger was to great, they had permission to wound or even kill.

When we arrived there, the fight already happend. Our warriors were standing in a circle, surrounding the rogues. But the rogues kept trying to break throught. My father and I quickly shifted. He used his Alpha tone so the rogues would submit. As they got calmer, my father joined the circle and I followed him. Even thought rogues smelled foul like rotten meat and sewer, there was also a sudden sweet smell that cut everything away.

The smell was intoxicating and consuming. I wanted more, needed more. I looked around to find the source of the smell. My eyes locked with a pair of yellow orbs.

*MATE* My wolf screamed.

The yellow eyes came closer and then they vanished. I felt a pain in my chest, it was intense and it made me fall on my knees. When I looked up I saw my father's wolf with blood on his muzzle and a dead she-wolf beneath him. I let out a roar and than everything became fuzzy.


A stray tear leaves my eye. After 5 years, this still hurts. It's less intense and I learned to live with the pain. In a way I was lucky that I didn't know her. I didn't miss specific traits. But at the same way I hate the fact that I didn't get the chance to get to know her. I hated it even more that is was my own father who took the chance from me. I nearly killed him at that point. It's one of the reasons that he lives on the edge of the territory.

My mother as a hopeless romanticus, hopes I will find my second chance mate. But we all now that it is pretty rare that the moon goddess blesses you twice. Some wolves don't even find their fated mate. So no, I don't really support the whole 'rejecting your mate'-thing. I would even say that I hate everyone that thinks they had the privilege to reject their gift from the moon goddess.

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