There's always a time when you question your existence. That why you were brought to this world and what is your duty.
For a werewolf no matter what their position is there is also a main reason why they were born, to protect their other half. Weather it's boy or girl doesn’t matter protecting your other half the person your destined with since birth it's an honour that I never experienced.
Since I was a child the stories of mates that my father and mother said to me were always the one that fascinated me the most. No matter what I do I've always thought that do I also have a mate out there or not.
A person who were made for you, a person who would understand you and support you when no one else would. I've always thought about it but as the time pass and I still didn’t found her I was disappointed.
Slowly slowly my trust on that I have a mate out there was fading. But right at the time when I was at my giving up point I met her. Right when our eyes met I knew I was a goner. No matter what happens I'll protect this girl with my life that's what came to my mind the first time I saw her between three wolfs confidently staring at them like a true queen she is.
They why? Why am I in this position where I have to stand down and watch my mate, my love fight the man she despises the most. It's not like I don’t believe in her I know if there is anyone whose capable of doing something no one have it would be her, my beautiful Esme.
It's the feeling of hopelessness, a feeling which I never have is what I felt back then when I was held down by the shadows. I don’t want her to face her fears and demons alone no matter how strong someone is they need someone to protect them too.
I don’t want to hold her back when she wants to punish the man who killed her father and tortured her mother. I can't relate to how much hate she have for that man or how much in pain she might be to think about that dark past of hers.
But no matter what the circumstances is I wanted to be by her side. Seeing your loved one fight alone and your unable to do anything is one the worst feeling that anyone can ever go through.
"Her highness is fine she's just tired from using all the powers together and the things happened today has also taken a troll on her. Nothing serious she'll wake once her body is rested well" our pack doctor said.
Although I knew she was alright I can't help but exhale a breath of relief. I looked at my mate who is sleeping peacefully like the things that happened today was all a nightmare.
I caresse her head gently. 'I'm glad your fine even though you went through so many things today'
'Couldn’t protect mate' Alastair whined in my head looking down like a lost puppy.
I didn’t object because deep down I myself is disappointed. But what's done is done Esme wouldn’t want me to be sad in myself. Infact she would scold me for even thinking such foolish thing.
And I know that too, but I can't help but be this way because I love her like no tomorrow. "Don’t worry when you'll wake up all those negative emotions will be gone. So just rest and come back to me when your ready" I whispered kissing her forehead softly.
I looked at her for few more seconds before coming out of our room. "Jack is everything sorted out?" I started speaking as soon as I saw him walking towards me.
"Yes the injured ones has all been treated and all the woman's and children’s are safe on thier house. The other packs have sent many letter's regarding this war also the council wants a meeting more like demanding a meeting with you what do you want me to do about that?"
"The letter's burn them all. And about the meeting the council members are demanding tell them I'm too busy to deal with their childish demands anything else?" I said with an emotionless face as we walk towards my office close to our room.
"Yes I just got an report that says, that the night hunters pack have cleared the west side even before they reach our territory" that stopped me going towards my table.
"The night hunters pack?" I asked to make sure that I heard it right.
"Yes the night hunters pack they also sent two letter's one is about their condolence of the war and the other one is addressed to Queen Esmeralda" Jack said
I thought for few minutes the night hunters pack is a pack that stay's out of people's business as far as I know. They don't get involve in wars unless it's necessary but them helping us even when I didn’t asked anything.
No, they didn’t did it because of me they did it because of Esme. I exhaled a sigh 'so this was the reason why she went out so late at night few days ago'
"Keep the night hunters packs letter and burn the others also give me the letter that was addressed to Esme I'll give it to her when she'll wake up myself"
"Understood, and what are you planing to do with the warlock and the witch?"
"That is up to Esmeralda, they are her enemy and she holds hatred towards them the most so it's up to her what she wants to do with them"
"Jack after burning the letters go to your room and rest for today tell and omega to sent the letter to me if I saw you coming to office you'll be a dead wolf" I warned him before he left the room.
He chuckled "I'm a beta, Xander a royal beta at that so this little war is nothing for me I can handle myself well my duty is to serve the king and as long as your working I can't rest. So if you want me to rest you need to rest either or I'm working too"
"I can't change your mind now can I?" When he didn’t answer I knew he won't rest untill I rest.
But I'm a king so I won't give up "well no worries you'll go to your room to rest soon"
Before he can say anything the door opened and Nina walked in with a furious look on her face. "Didn’t you say you'll just report to Xander and then come back to the room to rest?"
"Uh....Nina How can I rest I'm a beta-"
"Stop your nobel lecture right there tell it someone who doesn’t care about you didn’t you saw the wounds you got the doctor clearly said for you to be on a bed rest but your here being stubborn. Your coming with me and resting untill you heal and no arguing" Nina scolded him.
It was hard for me to hold my laughter but I somehow managed because if Nina saw I'm laughing in this serious matter then she'll probably start to cry or lecture me too.
"Nina I can't do that Xander needs me don't you?" Jack looked at me for help but I'm not falling for it. He clearly needs to rest after what happened.
"I can cope without you for few days Jack you should listen to your mate" I said with a smile on my face.
And before he can find more excuse Nina dragged him out of the room. As soon as the door closed my expression dropped.
I needed time to myself for a while. There isn’t much work to since I've completed them before so even I rest it won't be a problem. But I couldn’t rest untill I sort out my own thought.
I closed my eyes and thought about all the things that happened today. The cold expression on my mate's face was something I never saw. Even when we first met her face wasn’t that cold.
It's true she was on her guard but I never saw an expression like that on her face before. Her face was so cold and fill with hatred that a shiver went down my spine and I wasn’t even the one who was receiving it.
I couldn’t hear what they talked about because of the fog and when the fog cleared Mark was already kneeling down clutching his hand while blood was flowing freely.
I was shock but proud as I saw my mate fight like that. As much as I want to kill that bastard for touching and hurting Esme I can't do that.
Because that is not my place to do so. I know how much she hate him and how many answers she needs from him. And it's rightfully her place to punish him.
"What will I do when I want to protect you but I failed to do so, I know this feeling isn’t right and you won't like it when I feel like this but as a mate and your partner I can't help but feel this way" I said no one in particular.
A knock broke me out of thoughts "come in"
An Omega came in with a letter on her hands "your Majesty I was ordered to give this letter to you by beta Jack"
"Thank you. Leave it here and you can leave" I said without even looking at her.
She put the letter down and went out as soon as she come. Not long after that another knock came to the door and before I can give permission the nurse who was In Charge of Esme's care came in.
"Your Majesty I'm sorry to come in like this but Her Majesty has woken up but she's desperately calling for you" she said looking down.
Even before she finished her whole sentence I was up from the chair and was walking out of the room towards our room where Esme is.
As soon as I opened the door the first thing I saw was my mates crying face and I immediately rushed towards her and embraced her in my arms tightly.
"Shh....love everything is fine now you don’t have to cry anymore. I'm here I'm right here with you" I said.