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Red Gold

By Jace L. Lockewood All Rights Reserved ©

Romance / Fantasy


Rowan Avis is here to tell you the unconventional story of how she fell in love and how it killed her. Sometimes fantasy can really hit home, but other times it leaves us yearning for a possibility presented perfectly, when in reality it is never like that. I'm hoping this falls somewhere in the middle.

Step 1

Midday Sunday morning is when I reevaluate my life choices. It just happened to be this very time when my life decided for me. Let’s all get the collective groan out of the way as I mention that it was a boy who started all this. A fiery boy with bright red hair and paint smattered hands. I wish I could tell you that this boy saved my life, but he didn’t. I still die in the last chapter and he becomes the villain. I wish I could say that we fell in love perfectly, but instead, we fell in and out in a mismatched pattern, but it was still beautiful while it lasted.

He wasn’t anyone new in my life either. He had been there since day one and became my best friend. We made plans together; in sickness and in health we would be there for each other, an arms length away. I don’t think I need to hint at this point that it didn’t stay this way.

It was a Tuesday evening and we were together again, watching some stupid movie I don’t remember the name of. All I remember is our legs tangled together in quiet silence, begging us to take it a step further, for one of us to lean in, but the moment was ruined when his mom came down. I never thought I was doing any harm, but we still scrambled to move our legs just the same. Wednesday we lazed around sharing a bed and watching videos on the web. It was intense. Thursday, everything changed.

I got the midnight text to meet him, life or death importance but not to tell anyone else. I took his word for it and ran. He was great and all but I wasn’t planning to risk my freedoms on sneaking out, but I guess plans change when you think your best friend is bleeding out in front of an oncoming train or something. Turns out that he wasn’t in any danger at all, if you don’t count a danger to himself.

There was a gun, a blade, and a rope. Empty bottles were littering the ground and I could see his medication in his shirt pocket. This boy was ready. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I screamed and slapped him across the face, hoping to wake him up to reality. “We made a pact.” He said matter-of-factly. My head spun as I recalled what he was talking about. A suicide pact. “No!” I screamed,” That is supposed to deter you from dying. Do you want me to die as well? Is that it?” I was already employing guilt tactics, as I stared deep into his dead eyes. My fists were clenched and I could feel heat burning in them, as the cold air chilled my bones. “You’ll be with me and that’s all I want.” He stated,“Or did that night mean nothing?”

We had talked and talked in hushed whispers about our troubles one night, and that was the night we made our pact. It was supposed to deter us both. “You are breaking a pact, you are not allowing me to die” he pleaded with me. “Then let’s go home! you can spend the night I don’t care just don’t do this!” I whispered suddenly. I was surprised he heard me. “Fine.” He said flatly, as he picked up the gun and shot himself in the head. I felt the pain like it was my own. I counted to five. The body was supposed to fall over right? It’s not supposed to stare directly into my soul. I could feel his life leave him, but he continued to stand there. The body smiled, grimly. What the hell was going on?

“My name is Rowan and I’m here for suicide, depression, anxiety, and bipolar. That, of course, wasn’t all I was here for but I wasn’t gonna name the real reason. “My name is Aphra and I’m here cause Rowan wouldn’t kill me.” The Real Reason I Was Here said. “Shut up” I signed to him. “Does sex bother you Rowan?” One of the girls asked. I frowned at the strange question, and shook my head. “Why did you tell me to shut up then?” The girl signed. Shit. “I wasn’t I was- um-” I signed and spoke at the same time, fumbling both into a giant mess and getting everyone’s attention now. “Was it him?” She signed, pointing to where Aphra was standing” Double Shit. Super Shit. Big Massive Block of A Turd someone saw Aphra. I wasn’t crazy. “Are you okay?” No. “Sweetie are you alright?” No. “What’s wrong?” I ran out the room to escape the questions while Aphra followed bleakly.

Someone was sobbing in the stalls. Oh wait, that’s me. Someone saw Aphra. Aphra is dead. “Deadish” Aphra said, practically reading my thoughts. “Cause remember you wouldn’t let me die.” “This is why you should never make pacts with witches.” a voice said. a voice that sounded strikingly similar to the girl I was trying to get away from. I opened the stall door. “Haha very funny how bad am I tripping.” I asked plainly. “Not a bit of hallucinogen in your system.” She said proudly. I glared.

“Maybe a LIVING person could talk sense into you Row.” Aphra sassed. "egredietur" The girl whispered, somehow blowing Aphra out of the room in a single soft breath. "How much has he told you?" "A lot." "Meet me at midnight, train tracks, you know the ones." "Just don't try to off yourself there." "Thanks" 

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