Marilla Hali Conway
I should hate vampires. I should. They killed my brother and father on the same day. They dove into them as if they were nothing more than a source of food. They’ve hunted my kind as if we were a threat. Killing us as if we were rodents. Not caring if we too had family or weren’t malignant all because of a false prophecy told by a witch long ago.
Yet I can’t seem to hate him. I’ve been near him for days and I just seem to get pulled in. As if there were something there and I couldn’t pull away. I can’t fall for him but he’s been mending my broken heart. He somehow helps fill the void Sereia left behind and she would hate him. So why can’t I tell my heart to quit falling for him? Why won’t it listen to me? I have a responsibility to my people.
Moon goddess what kind of cruel joke is this. Making me a vampire’s forever knowing the fate of the merfolk rests on my hands especially now that Sereia’s gone. I’ll need to leave but every day that passes by my resolve fades away. My heart won’t let me and I am growing fearful that I won’t leave when the time comes and my people will fall because I met love.
Why can’t I love my fiancé like I do this vampire? Why did my forever have to be a vampire and no the man that will govern the seas? He’s my greatest...
“I’m glad to see your awake,” his voice sets my insides on fire. It sends me into overdrive and my skin needs his touch, his mouth on me. I lift my head to meet his eyes through the mirror. Feeling overdressed in a yellow crop top and blue shorts. Wearing nothing but a bathing suit underneath ready to jump into a body of water. He’s wearing blood-red shorts with a fitted black t-shirt. How ironic? The mermaid in blue and the vampire in red? We’re polar opposites yet...
“Funny, a vampire wearing red, seeing how many lives he’s ended” I open my mouth placing my facade on. I can’t allow him to see the effect he has on me. If I do then I’ll never be able to leave. I rather keep breaking his heart than let the Ocean Blue down. I have to walk away one day and if he knows I’ve already let him into my heart, I won’t be able to. I can’t walk away from him if he knows.
“Not all vampires are monsters,” he answers me hurt. My heart breaks but not enough to drop my mask. I can never drop it. Vampires aren’t the only ones with a cold heart. So can a mermaid.
“You keep saying that yet it doesn’t bring back all those you’ve killed,” I answer as I brush my hair. My words seem to have impacted him as guilt and sorrow twist his features tugging at my heart but I can’t seem to open my mouth to take them back. I can’t so I bite my tongue to prevent them.
I won’t. The truth of the past is not just going to be blinded because feelings between two people exist. Not all people who fall in love will end up together. We aren’t in a fairytale. We won’t have a happy ending. We’re enemies belonging to two worlds a fate that will never change. I will always belong to the sea and he to the undead. I will forever be betrothed to someone else. He will always be a killer.
Even if it wasn’t him that killed my father it was his kind. I may have grown to love him in these past few days but it does not mean I’ll stay. He may not have been the one to hurt me but he will be the one to pay for those broken plates because he’s one of them. I don’t care to know what lies beyond the monster which is why I keep things platonic. Never venturing more than being around him.
I can’t see more than the monsters I know they are. I would falter in my decision something that can’t come to reality. I will hurt him time and time again because deep down I know the monster he is. I know Sereia would never approve and even in death, I can’t let her down. She was my soulmate and he’s beginning to help fill that void something I wanted but now feels like a betrayal.
“You might just be right but at least I have the satisfaction of knowing by being a monster, I’ve been able to rid this world of monsters far worse. They won’t be hurting others where they are,” a response I definitely wasn’t expecting. I’m intrigued and want to push for answers but if I do... He won’t be a vampire anymore, he’ll be more.
“Doesn’t change the fact that you’ve killed, now what do you need?” I don’t want to love him. I want him to heal me so I can leave. I want to hate him so I can keep my people safe. I shouldn’t love him and I don’t want to but he’s a damn plague despite denying anything that could get me to know him better. I don’t care if he isn’t a monster, I don’t want to know.
“I want to take you somewhere,” he answers defeated and I roll my eyes.
“No,” going somewhere enables me to learn more of him and I’m already falling for him. I don’t need reasons to love him. I need reasons to hate him and they keep on fading every time we spend time together.
“I’m afraid you don’t bear a choice today,” he says with a smile.
“And what is that supposed to mean?” I ask him placing the hairbrush down and placing my hands on the table. I may want him to show me everything but I won’t give in to temptation. My answer soon arrives when at lightning speed I’m whisked away in his arms. I scream in surprise as I’m forced to hold onto him.
My heartbeat beating at his beat. My head resting on his chest and melting. Days of making sure there is no contact between us knowing well my conviction would falter and I was right. I don’t want to leave his arms anymore. They feel like home a feeling only felt in the Ocean Blue and with Sereia. Not with a vampire. It isn’t right. My people need me and I’m falling for him.
We arrive at the most beautiful place. A waterfall cascading down beautifully into a lake. A forest surrounding us with nothing but the sounds of birds and the water. A humble picnic set at the edge of the water with a bottle of wine in between. A red plaid blanket and a sky blue blanket set nearby.
He places me down and I’m left cold. Unable to stand without him yet his hands hold me to prevent me from falling. We’re far away from everyone but us. We’re here alone with no one to help me keep my heart at bay. No excuses to use, or pretenses.
“Where are we?” I muster holding in all emotion.
“My sanctuary, my safe place,” he answers his breath brushing against my neck. I tilt my head back in response unable to fight what my heart craves being so far away from his home where vampires are crawling. Pretending to hate him was much easier when his oversized home was crawling with creatures of all kinds. But I’m not there. Instead, I’m inside his soul.
I’m unable to formulate a response to get me away from here. The words seem nonexistent in my brain as they seem to vanish. Gazing into a piece of his soul being so precious I can’t turn away. My heart aches to know more, to know the one it loves is deserving of said feeling. It needs reaffirmation that loving him is right when it’s in conflict with my brain about doing so. It needs to know it’s the right thing to do and that it isn’t in the wrong for loving him. It needs to prove me wrong.
I don’t want to be proven wrong. I need to leave one day and marry another. I won’t bear the strength to do so if I’m wrong. I don’t need to be corrected. I need to keep believing he’s a monster but I can’t do so when I’m gazing at his soul. My heart’s going to win this battle and it’s not a defeat I’m prepared for. Not one anyone is.
“You keep refusing to get to know me and I’m tired of talking and having you ignore me. So, I plan on showing you instead,” he says into my ear and I lean back into him unable to keep my mask on and letting it fall. I know I won’t be winning this battle and frankly, I don’t want to anymore. I don’t want to keep fighting with myself. I want to get to know him and love him freely away from everything.
I don’t want to think especially when surrounded by all this beauty that is his soul. I want to forget that we’re from distinct worlds. For today he isn’t a vampire and I’m not a mermaid we’re just two people who want to get to know each other.
“This is my getaway when the world gets too much and after being around for thousands of years trust it me it does,” he replies as his arms wrap around me and I feel comfort. Feeling warm on a winter’s night. “I want you to know every part of me and everything there is to me.”
“Why is it that despite you being a monster I can’t help falling for you?” I ask him and he stiffens to my confession. I can’t seem to lie to him when he’s showing me his soul. He spins me around in his arms and looks down into my eyes. I’m drawn to them unable to look away.
“Then why do you keep pushing me away,” he inquires with hopeful eyes that I can’t break. I can’t shatter his dreams and hopes. I can’t seem to do so when I’m getting a glimpse at his heart.
“Because I shouldn’t love you and I won’t be able to walk away,” I confess with tearful eyes. My loyalties lie with the Ocean Blue and the merfolk. But it’s been days of seeing the little things about him. It’s been an eternity of pushing him away when my soul craves him in all his rawness. Denying myself the luxury of meeting such a beautiful out of obligation for the water.
“Then don’t walk away, stay, and let me love you all the same. Let me get to know you and be mine forever,” he offers such a sweet bargain but it isn’t right. I can’t break my promises for him. I can’t let my species grow extinct because I wasn’t strong enough.
“I would like nothing more but...”
“No, buts,” he says placing a finger over my lips and I fall victim to temptation. I have to taste him, have him just once. I have to see his soul in all its rawness and vulnerability. I have to be true to myself and my heart. I can’t keep fighting this.
I part my lips and let my tongue have a taste of his finger taking him aback. Yet a fire seems to have erupted between us and I have kept it at bay for as long as I could. I have to know more than just the monster I have seen from my past memories. He isn’t like them. He’s my forever and I’m tired of fighting against the pull to be together when it’s what Selene wants.
I savor it before I feel it not being enough. I have to know what his lips taste like and know how they feel like. I raise myself till our lips meet and tug at his bottom lip. The fire seems to have ignited in him as well as he dominates the kiss between us. At superspeed, I find myself against a tree with an arm pinned up above my head. A leg wraps around his waist as his other hand grips onto it. My other arm wrapped around his neck pulling him closer unable to get enough from him.
I need him more than I’ve ever seemed to need anything. I want him as I’ve never felt before. My heart and soul craving him and only him. I won’t fight it anymore. I can’t. Not when I’ve had a glimpse of his heart and soul. And certainly not after I’ve had a taste. I need everything from him. I need to know every single piece and fragment there is of him. I have to feel every trace of his skin until I’ve engraved it with my touch. I have to be his and have him be mine for all eternity.
I guess what they say about forever love is true. No matter who you are or what creature you might be, you can’t fight it. You can try but will ultimately fail without it. No one can fight against it. Not even a mermaid. The more you deny it the more it grows and I have come to learn more about this vampire than I’ve cared to admit.
I know he’s gentle with others despite their race. I’ve seen his helpful soul and noble heart as he interacts with others. I’ve seen his forgiving nature when others make mistakes and are clumsy enough to drop something. I’ve seen his interaction with children knowing he’ll be a great father one day. I’ve heard him fighting for what is just and how much he strives to help others.
I know he appreciates art but has a passion for books. I’ve grown to learn from him, about him, through him. I know he has a knack for writing but stores it away yet leaving it out just for me. I’ve seen him worry for me and making sure I’m taking care of myself. I’ve gotten glimpses and have fallen madly in love with this vampire who I can no longer walk away from. I was a fool to ever think I could ever try to live without him.
He’s grown on me and imprinted me. Consumed every part of me. I just kept lying to myself and him unable to accept the truth and know the stories he had to tell but now I want nothing more than to hear them. Seeing his soul before me and getting a glimpse at his heart I can’t go on without knowing them from his lips. Ones that consumed me whole. I couldn’t live without him and one taste was enough to prove that to me.
I pull him even closer to me feeling too distant despite our bodies touching. There are too many barriers of clothing. They are driving me insane. I pull his shirt trying to get it off him but it’s hard when he has one of my arms pinned over my head.
“Make me yours,” I breathe when his lips graze my neck leaving his mark into mine. I want my touch to intertwine with his and be one with him just as I am one with the water and was with Sereia. I want us to move as if we were one. I want to be one with him. Move as one unable to tell where he began and I ended.
My words seem to fuel his fire as he tears open my top along with the top part of my bathing suit. I should feel exposed and feel freer than I have in a long time. But he’s wearing too much. I pull at his shirt finding the strength to tear it open. In flashes, we’re exposed to one another as a frenzy of lust and love consume us. We engrave each other with our touch, leaving a reminder of ourselves in one another for others to see.
We find ourselves moving as one unable to distinguish where one began and the other ended. Filling ourselves with as much as we could unable to stop. Wanting and desiring to be together forever as we showed each other just how we truly felt. Our souls connecting in a way never thought possible as we exposed our vulnerability to one another. The rawness of our true selves coming to light as together we created something beautiful.
The sun shining down onto his gracious features as he took me to paradise along with him. Together finding more about ourselves as we reached all new heights of pleasure that couldn’t have been possible without one another. His expert movements rending me weak unable to...
“I love you,” he whispers looking at my soul through my eyes evoking a smile from my lips as we were one. Unable to deny myself of letting him not know how I felt.
“I love you too and want to know everything there is about you. I want to hear all those stories you’ve been dying to tell and I’ve been dead set on not listening. I want to know everything and learn what I still don’t know about you as we live a life forever.” I answer him as I gaze into his soul with a smile. I’m tired of being the good daughter. Carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders.
I want a love like my parents had, like Sereia dreamed of. I don’t want to marry out of convenience. I want to marry the vampire that stole my heart. I want to be his and only his. Sereia would have given him a chance if it meant true happiness. She would be happy knowing I found a love like this even if it was with a vampire. She would want me happy, she always did.
He was my forever. I love him. I want to be his and only his. And I want him to be mine. I plan to live eternity with him and still save the merfolk just not through an arranged marriage. I can’t go on without him. I want my fairytale with him. We’ll find a way to live our love and overcome coming from two worlds.
“I want you to make me yours forever, I want us to do the ritual. I want us to spend the rest of our lives learning everything there is to know about one another but I want to do so knowing we’ll be together for eternity,” I say and he looks at me with love.
“Are you certain, till a few hours ago I thought you hated me,” he says sadly and I nod. I’ll regret hurting him but I’ll make it up to him in our life of eternity.
“I’m sorry for denying it but trust me I’m certain, I want everyone to know I’m yours and your mine,” I answer and he nods.
“I have to bite onto your neck and you’ll have to drink my blood to tie our life force with one another,” he says and I nod. “It’ll hurt at first but the endorphins will kick in and you’ll feel paradise.”
“But I already have so just do so just stay inside me,” I answer and he nods before biting onto my neck and I am transported to paradise. I tug onto his hair to claim his lips and bite onto his lip tasting the blood and letting it mingle with my own when he bites onto my lip. Sending us both into Euphoria as our blood mixes and forms a link between both our souls as his name is engraved onto me and mine onto him leaving our mark on each other. Each unique from anyone else’s.
Ours being a bat and water combined. With our initials engraved in both. Fitting seeing we come from different worlds. His name engraved on my heart like a tattoo visible to all. Only to appear when anyone else dared touch me as a warning of a terrible fate.