Change the past
The moment Tally stepped foot in camp he sent Mason to give her company before any other man attempted. He sat roughly on the ground against the base of a tree trunk, flicking twigs off into the dirt. He loved Kona, even the parts he didn’t like. Perhaps it was the Alpha in her but she was incredibly selfish at times. She thought of her wants, of her needs, of her desires, and cared little for anyone else’s. He was bitter toward that fact, that she was capable of selfishness while he had never been able to live for himself.
Kona was right, he had told her he loved her. But she had been silent in her response. What did she believe would happen? He’d be fine? His heart wouldn’t break? She could use him whenever she felt lonely? Was she that ignorant or emotionless that she couldn’t fathom something like love to affect him?
“Hey.” A woman stood in front of him, “Ciara, remember?”
Boobs, was all he could think of. She had passed by him a few days ago on her way to the showers, naked and cold.
Tally’s face heated up and he cleared his throat, “Yep.”
Ciara sat down beside him, grinning. Her red hair pooled into a bun on the back of her head. She had green eyes like his own but they looked nothing alike otherwise. She held a drink up but he denied it. Someone had to keep lookout.
“Alpha Kona is as amazing as I wanted her to be.” She admitted.
“You didn’t like Lorcan?”
“What woman would? I was raised Bisset but I watch TV. I know women in the human world aren’t nearly so suppressed. They’re cops and lawyers and doctors. If they can be something else, so can I.”
“Weren’t they your family?”
“Family.” She murmured, leaning back against the tree. “Some.”
“How can you follow someone that killed your family?”
She shrugged. “Just can.”
“What do you want from Alpha Kona?”
“I don’t know.” She answered. “Just something different to what Lorcan was offering. Maybe…” Ciara cut herself off, “You’re gonna think I’m stupid.”
“No, I won’t. Tell me.”
“I want to be important.”
Tally leaned back against the tree. He didn’t know what he was expecting. He was beginning to believe any woman that followed Kona would be like Leylanni. They were hoping for the end of men. It was a surprise to know that Ciara’s want and his were the same.
Kona laid on the forest floor, staring up at the trees. For a few hours, she was happy. The liquor had tossed her into a boat but all around her were waves of good feeling, erasing all her stress, all her fears and doubts, and for once, she could think clearly despite the constant teeter-totter she seemed to be playing with the floor.
Now the sea had toss her out and she felt nauseated, exhausted, depressed, and worse, humiliated. Her hands fell over her face as she thought about her run-in with Tally. She could feel the heat of her face as blood rushed up to her cheeks. How could she have been so stupid? She never acted so implusively. Out of all the people to embarrass herself with, why did it have to him?
But she wouldn’t be embarrassed if he hadn’t turned her down. Why had he refused her? He said he loved her. Didn’t he want her?
No, correction, he said he was IN love with her. There was no confusion. He was no longer her soldier that cared for her because he had too. He was a man that wanted to be with her.
Kona pulled her hands away from her face and found five women hanging above her. She went to get up but the movement tossed her right back into a boat but this time the waves were unfriendly. She fell back to the floor with laughter in her ears. The girls kneeled around her and one held up a leaf to her mouth, “Here, this should help with the nausea.”
She unwillingly took it, grimacing the whole time she chewed.
The girls spoke around her, talking about this person or that. Kona didn’t know who and wasn’t listening to most of it. But it was actually pleasant, not being alone.
As she thought back to her life in the compound, she was always alone. Sure Mason would be around sometimes and Tally would be following as per his orders, but she was without a friend. Her pack-mates treated her like she was a walking disease, barely giving her a smile, talking to her with distance between them, patronizing her when she could see the aversion in their eyes.
And now she knew the reason.
But here, with them, for the first time, being a female Alpha earned her their friendship.
“What do you think, Alpha Kona? Does he have a chance?”
Janis cackled, “My brother. Quid. He’s enchanted by you.”
Kona didn’t want to insult her by telling her she had no idea who Quid was. But instead changed the subject, “You found your brother.”
“Because of you.”
It was something she needed to hear. That out of her violence, something good came of it.
“Is there a man that already has your interest?”
Kona scoffed, stifling a bitter cackle. “Yes.” The word fell out of her mouth before she realized it. “I embarrassed myself though.”
Was she so willing for friendship that she was allowing herself to be weak? Isn’t this how Daxon got to her? She exposed so much about her life with a stranger because she was desperate to have a connection with someone.
“I kind of threw myself at him and he didn’t want me.”
“Typical.” Janis bit, “They want when they want. It’s all about control.”
“My mate doesn’t control our mating habits.” Hera bragged.
“I’ll never understand why you chose to be mated. It is much more fun having options. I mean what if his dick is small?”
Kona’s eyes bulged but she hung her head so no one would notice. These woman were obviously not a virgin like her.
Hera responded, “If size means so much to you, I feel sorry for you. There are plenty of ways to be pleased. My mate knows all of them because of the time and care I’ve put into teaching him.”
Under her breath, Janis replied, “And every girl he’s fucked since.”
Hera stood, “You question my mate’s honor?”
“Just being realistic. I know Alpha Lorcan didn’t allow mates. You think Warren stayed celibate?”
“That is none of your business. That’s the problem with you Cave pack wolves. You don’t know loyalty if it hit you in the face.”
Janis was a Delphi wolf who got caught up in a cave pack but she didn’t share this, continuing to smirk, “Bet you had a few too, didn’t ya?”
Nadia snatched a hold of Hera, “Stop it. You’re embarrassing yourselves in front of Alpha.” Nadia put a hand on her growing pregnant belly, “Our mates did what they had to do and so did we. Life is more important than a few unwanted touches.”
Janis reluctantly apologized, “I wasn’t trying to offend anyone. I’m never settling down. I like my freedom.”
“You live dangerously.” Hera remarked.
“I’ve learned how to protect myself for the most part.”
Lorcan hung above her. His blood dripping on her face. She blinked, squinting. He smiled to expose his bloody teeth.
“Can we forget our past?” Kona whispered. “Can we start over? Blank and new?”
Imagine if she could start over. Imagine all the blood that would wash away. She’d be innocent, and child-like. She’d be the girl her parent’s raised. She wouldn’t know hate or distrust. She wouldn’t know guilt and regret.