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Damnation Of Devotion (18+)

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"I would've prayed for Them to go easy on you too." He moves and his eyes are on me. Eyes where they're brimming with tears, but his soft smile confuses me. Gently caressing my temple to my jaw, he sees me as if I'm the most delicate treasure. His lips kiss my fingers. "They did. A few years late but They did. Their mercy on me is you." ✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧ While the World War 2 is absorbed in its own devastation, a runaway slave stumbles upon a meadow. He's saved by a curious, lonely spirit and builds an affinity with her; but will he be her only salvation or eternal damnation? Either way, she can't let him go. And neither can he... as they're more similar than they thought. With unexpected gifts and losses coming their way, they go on a journey for a sense of peace through a strange reality, a stark contrast to her own. The human world. Not an easy feat. Especially where ghosts and dreadful humans are concerned. ✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧ Warning: Death and war themes, smut, harsh language, mild violence, trafficking, miscarriage Copyright © 2021 by L.I. Lost Yearn *This story is a work of fiction. Names, characters, events and incidents are made for fictional purposes. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.*

5.0 2 reviews
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Another Halfwit

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{ KI }

“Oh come on! Really? These humans are... insignificant,” Taq sneers. She primps her bright-green, wavy hair at the nearest reflection, which is my river.

Glancing from Taq to Fomu, I’m unsure if Fomu is joking or not. He knows I’m particularly interested in this topic, and I do not appreciate that he would mock me by giving false information. Although now, judging from an excited tremble in his boyish appearance, I’m glad he isn’t.

Fomu ignores her. “I’m serious! They’re sooo passionate—”

“Passionate or reckless?” Taq glares at him.

“Perhaps that’s why they’re zealous about it. Hanging on to feel alive with each other as their mortality catches up on them,” I say.

“It’s actually sad.” Fomu’s melodic voice is laced with pity.

I sigh, however. “Pretty romantic too...” Such a novel concept to think about if these two would dabble about passion long enough.

Mortal creatures should’ve grieved their impending deaths and not enjoyed their short times, no? But not all of them do.

“You’ve idealized their lifestyle too much,” Taq speaks curtly.

“Am not,” I mutter.

She scoffs but I know she comes from a good place. She just doesn’t want me to feel bad because I’m stuck here. Unable to see... Well, out there. What’s there to offer. Aside from the global war that is caused by humans again.

Being a higher spirit supposedly being all-powerful but eh... it has its disadvantages. Other higher spirits have the best spots out there, even outside of this orbiting rock! So yes, I’m stuck here, even though I love this meadow and its weather with all of my being. They’re a part of me, spacious, despite being small compared to others.

“Don’t be a spoilsport, Taq!” Fomu laughs.

“Why do you need humans for entertainment? We’re fun by ourselves!”

These two... They’re my friends but... never close. Taq’s place is in the south wind while Fomu’s place is in the west wind. They occasionally bring me knowledge about humans and their creations. Afterward? They will fly off again and leave me alone for a long time. I don’t blame them, it’s in their nature.

It doesn’t help when our looks are vastly different too. Their skins are ivory and lush with a pink tinge, while mine is darker. My hair is dark brown and theirs are bright like the skies. And our eyes? Theirs are round like planets, while mine are... like comets. Even our heights are different—I couldn’t change this one if I wanted to, a perk of higher rank. Then again, I refuse to change my appearance, no matter how helpful it could be to feel close to them.

Now I think about it, I could have more friends, more humans to know a little, more everything. Natives were offering themselves to me. Intruders did too. The question remains: why am I damn picky about them?

Mmm… I have all the time in the world and will drive myself crazy over it at another time.

It’s hard to keep up with rapid civilizations, especially when there are many different ones in different places! Being immortal has its cons and one of them is the blur of time. I’m trying my best to learn every time and now, most humans like to use English in their mid-twentieth century. Such a strange language.

I hum in wonder. “Really, Fomu. I wonder what it’s like?”

“Sex, you mean?”

“Yes... To feel so passionate about one’s body.”

“I guess we’ll never know,” Taq interjects.

For fuck’s sake. I know we don’t have any sexual desires, but for once, can she ever lighten up about this? “That’s very pessimistic of you.”

“It’s called being realistic! We’re gods! Act like one.”

It doesn’t sit right with me. “Gods? Humans worshiped us as one but I still don’t feel powerful. The Highness has total power.”

“But you have more power than any humans ever existed. They’re fragile, restricted, and ignorant about the Universe. Unlike us. Cherish it, Ki.”

“I am, Taq, I am... I just don’t like the costs.”

Taq’s high-pitched sigh is toned with exasperation.

Fomu frowns at me under his sun-kissed bangs. “Costs are never meant to be liked. You’d think I like going around and never settle down? To never call a place of my own? It’s tiring.”

This… side of him caught me off guard. I didn’t know. “I’ve never— I’m sorry, Fomu.”

“Don’t be, we both have to suck it up, okay? Take care, Ki.”

I sigh. They both dissolve into winds, leaving me whispers of goodbyes. I then dissolve into my meadow, the rain, and the wind above as the evening falls. It’s hard work to nurture this place.

Can’t remember the last time when I had other forms except for these and a human one. I first saw a group of humans almost stumble into my meadow thousands of years ago; before I scared them away. I love how the female body looks, especially after what Fomu had described it to me. Sensual... And so, I did it.

I couldn’t feel any carnal desires, so might as well form myself into the most sensuous, voluptuous body I could appear as. At least, I’m close to the image of carnal desire, and I’ve been using this look forever. It’s not that I don’t want to use a male form, because I actually like it. I only wish to have sex with one, instead of becoming one.


I shake my head. “Wishes are dangerous. Stop it, Ki.” Wishes are prayers in general terms, thus I shouldn’t think about them flippantly.

But... the human body is a wonder. The blood and cells are working together to stay alive, yet decay. A large number of poor humans are forced to have them destroy each other in their very within, no need for other humans to do the deed.

And the pleasure. What they feel as rich chocolate lay on their tongues and down to their throats. Oranges and strawberries wash it away in sweet acidity. I could only taste things I’ve taken form, in which I’ve never taken the form of edible foods. How could I when animals and bugs are around? Those hungry critters would consume everything in sight.

And the humans’ chemical rush... When they touch, when they love, when they’re in love, when they make love. To a point, it shakes the very core of their beings and their souls.

Your Highness, forgive me! I shouldn’t even think—!

Wait. Right after the sun has set, screams are heard from the southern forest and slowly heading here. The faraway birds scatter in shrieks. “What is that?” I stop my rain due to worry. Humans? They’ll come here? My word. It’s been years. Time for another scare.

Back to human form and summoning my sword, I hope to Your Highness there won’t be any bloodshed. But run out of fortune’s grace, I smell blood. Damn them! I run to the edge of the forest. Under the smell of pungent adrenaline and booming shouts, I hear terrified but determined mutterings. Oddly, always with nos. That one... There’s no intention at all. Only a need to survive.

Alright then, come here. Let me see you, intriguing one.

{ AHT }

“Get back here!!”

No, no! I keep running and running and running. This forest is so thick, it’s difficult to get around. This sprained ankle and blood loss from the wound around my neck cause me to limp fast. Damn it, Harrison had put a number on me. I can’t afford to stop now when there’s a meadow in front—!

“You’re dead meat!”

Harrison pounces on me and sends us rolling on the ground to an open field. I struggle to get away from him, but my energy falters because I haven’t eaten since yesterday...

“What. Are. You. Doing. Here.”

A clear, stern voice stops the man on top of me. He stares at a person behind me and pushes me away, having the most disgusting predatory look. I look behind me to see the person.

Good God.

The most exquisite being I’ve ever laid eyes upon. Her gorgeous face is full of mischief and elegance, her amber brown skin gleams from the rain earlier, but her wild hair remains untouched. Her body is... naked. Ample breasts and perky rear fit nicely on her slim-toned body. Her limbs seem very strong from the way she swings an enormous sword. She’s a living sin, yet wafting out divinity. And so tall. Above-the-door kind of tall. Hold on, am I lusting? Is this lust?

“I said WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!?” Her voice turns thunderous and shock waves at us.

She is not human. Her intimidation seems familiar too and I couldn’t put my finger on it. Harrison seems too deep in lechery to notice that she’s holding a very threatening weapon. Oh, what a woman! Or whatever being she is.

“To take you,” Harrison foolishly states. Aihh... Bad move.

{ KI }

“Sorry?” My eyebrows shoot up. Shit, I can’t believe I have found another halfwit trespasser!

“I’ll show you how to earn my forgiveness.”

He has this sleaze look and I don’t like it. I glance over at the man beside him, who is all muddied up and bloody. I saw he was running away from the creepy man, possibly hurt by him...

I jerk my chin up. “No matter. I won’t go anywhere.”

The creep leers over me. “I’ll show you—”

“Did you hurt that man?”

He yanks the poor man’s long hair. The slimy man is an unforgivable lowlife then, pretending to be powerful. Greed of abuse entrenched deep in his heart. “What’s it to you, whore?” he snarls.

I dissolve his body into dust with a wave of my hand, gliding it up and away to the sky. He isn’t worthy of my sword and for his blood to be spilled on my home. Everything is quiet except the muddy man’s panting. Odd. Usually, owls and crickets would have conversations and their chatters are loud.

I pace over the muddy man—he’s getting away from me! Maybe my sword scares him. I vanish it. With no annoyance left in me, I coax him. “I’m truly sorry. Come here.”

He’s wary of me. I keep smiling at him, hoping he knows I’m not evil or anything. He slowly gets up and limps toward my way. Oh, his ankle bends at a strange angle, and the bloody neck... I grasp his cheeks with gentleness, causing a slight pause between his shaky breaths.

“Poor dear, are you fine?”

“I... I am. Thank you,” he mutters softly. His voice. A deep bass. Haunting even. Which is, humorously, attractive since his face is hidden under mud and blood. His eyes, however... are like mine. Comets. Dark color too.

I don’t feel alone as much. “I’ll show you my river to clean up.”

Taking him by the hand, I lead him to my river with caution. I couldn’t heal his ailments, but he will not get an infection if he cleans up. I wash his face as he washes the dirt off his clothes. It’s strange when he doesn’t strip, but no matter, he makes me giddy when he’s all gruff and careful in not touching me back.

We sit on the rocks in comfortable silence. It’s darker now, with moonlight showering on us. This man looks around and... blinks slowly? Now I can hear the owls and others, and they seem very joyous. What is up with them? I shrug off the thought and focus on him instead.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t help you with your wounds.” My fingers trace them around his neck. It must be excruciating...

“It’s fine, I’ll survive. I’ll patch them up in no time.”

He brings my fingers up and kisses them... to which he then clears his throat and proceeds to scrub the dirt away. My, a clueless charmer under the roughness.

I know he lusts over me, judging by his flexing muscles and hooded eyes whenever he looks at me. I couldn’t grasp him because he is a mystery. He has no intention so far and I can’t smell any chemicals from him except body scent, not even when he ran through the forest. The adrenaline smell came from that lowlife earlier.

He observes around. “Is this meadow your property? It’s amazing.”

He likes it?? Intriguing alright! His compliment makes me flutter all over, especially the small smile he has. People before him had given me flattery, though they were expecting something from me right after, unlike this man.

“Thank you. I deeply appreciate it. Yes, you can say it’s mine.”

There! He is all... cleaned up. My word. His whole being is beautiful. His face is intense and handsome, framed by his long, smooth, raven hair. I can see through his wet clothes clearly, where his muscles are so well-defined and full. His body is in peak condition with golden, light skin. He is even... taller than me. I’m right under his nose.

“Like what you see?”

{ AHT }

“What?” she asks in a small tone, looking up at me in soft surprise. Her normal voice is sweet.

“Do you like to see me?”

She stammers, and her head turns to the side. Adorable. Goodness, if only I could grip her hips and pound into her. And lick her damp skin... There’s no more confusion. I am literally capable of lust. My body needs warning signs. The way she looks at me tells me I’m not the only one who is attracted here, but I’m sensing no arousal from her, only admiration and interest.

“I’m sorry for being too forward.” Not fully sorry because it’s who I am, albeit I’d be too much for first impressions from most people.

My mind is fogging up with desire for her, and when she surprises me by turning my way with a bashful smile, my arousal dwindles. She deserves better than being lusted after.

Anyway, this place—even amazing is an understatement. Half of the velvety meadow is filled with different kinds of vibrant flowers, most are poppies, and the other half is clean-cut grass. It’s chaotic and disorganised as heck, contrasting the magnificent mountains on the far horizon and the moon-lit, crystal river. It is a beautiful, wonderful mess. I think she purposely does this.

As if she’s rebelling.

Oh damn! Out of thin air, all kinds of fruits fall on my lap. Some spill into the river. She giggles when I save the fruits clumsily. A cheeky lady she is...

“You realised them? What are these for?” I’m cradling the fruits. Most of them anyway.

“I heard your stomach grumbling, so it means you’re hungry, right? Eat up!”

“You sure...?”

“I’ll be offended if you don’t. Eat well, okay?”

My nose and eyes are overcome with a surge of force. I don’t want to cry, but finally, someone who is selflessly kind after all this time. Of course, she’s not human in the first place. I gobble up the fruits, tears roll down my cheeks while she gives me the most loving smile... Strawberries, apples, pears, and a lot more. Mmph she’s the generous type!

“Do you want some?” Haish! Wrong question, I forgot. Is she…? “I mean—”

“I couldn’t taste what they are like. Eat them for me, yes? I like watching you eat.”

I smile at her with a mouthful of apple chunks and keep eating. She sometimes laughs, though I don’t think it’s an insult. Seems she genuinely likes to see me eat.

After I’m full, she vanishes the leftovers away with a flick of her hand. I wonder what being she is, having this very familiar power. She never stops to amaze me—why is she sitting on my lap now???

“What happened to you?” Her head tilts.

Ugh, she feels good... Focus, Aht! “Mm. I was travelling around the world until the war happened. They captured me, turned me into a slave for their mines.”

“My goodness!”

She. Hugs me. Tight. All in her naked glory. Her breasts, her belly, her arms, her eye-rolling glorious smell... Poppies and rain, oh God. Please don’t get an erection, Aht.

“Is it safe to go back out there?” She rubs my back.

“It is, don’t worry. Their mines are far away from here. I had to run for quite a long time,” I choke out. My fingers are this close from squeezing her thighs and—

“Good thing you escaped! I’m proud of you!”

“I uh…” Inhale. Wrong move. Her goddamn scent. “Thank you. Again. Thank you for saving me.”

She’s facing me and beaming— Her crotch rubs against mine! I push her away and she stumbles. She looks hurt.

“I-I’m sorry! I don’t mean...” And I realise something.

She’s eyeing curiously... down? Down to my bulging erection. Ugh.

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