I pulled myself upright favouring my right arm.
"Ahh fudge cake " I cringed, rolling my stiff shoulders and right on cue, the subtle knocking on my door began. I fell back onto my bed and threw the less painful forearm over my eyes.
"Maybe if I don't answer, they'll go away..." I thought and then it was triggered. Those memories...
11 years ago
They told me I had to go away for awhile.
"Just until you're better darling" my father said one night after my siblings were sent to bed.
"Better?" I asked. I felt broken. What's "better"? I mean I always knew that I was not... proper. Like a rejected item. But "better"? And that too coming from my parents? It was only when I reached my destination that I realised what they meant. Man was I relieved. It was my father that accompanied me there. My home away from home. He pulled up to this castle. Just about as big as our home but a lot more... retro. Father chuckled at that comment. He replied to me "hold on to yourself darling. You're here for a reason. Just don't ever believe that who you are is one of those reasons." He smiled and then he leaned down a bit so that we were at eye level. He placed his hand on the side of my face and looked me in the eye as he continued "your mother and I... we'll be waiting for you life." He knew that despite me trying my hardest, I still felt like a reject.
I had been there for almost a year. I never visited home and my communication with them was limited and monitored. It was like prison just with better food and facilities. I was in my room one night and I remember the uneasiness, the irritation in my chest, it was almost unbearable. I remember sitting at the window suddenly feeling suffocated and my guardian, Ms Jessica, entered my room. I was about to question her about knocking but then I saw her sympathetic expression.
"What happened?" I asked cautiously.
"Miss Pendragon... I..." she stammered.
"Would you tell me already? What's happened?" I asked standing up from where I sat.
"It's your family..." was all I heard. I picked up my backpack and threw it over my shoulder as I made my way to the door.
"Miss Pendragon, you are forbidden to leave these grounds" she said as she swooped up in front of my like a breeze.
"Forbidden? Jessica it's either you move or be moved but either way I am leaving for home!" I said. Listening to those words leave my mouth, it was as if it wasn't my own voice. Such hostility and panic and... fear. Internally, I was shocked at myself but it's what I needed. How could they think that I would sit idle while something is off at home.
"Miss Pendragon I understand that you're worried but you need to understand the gravity of this situation." She explained. I scoffed. The gravity of the situation? Is she insane? Does she understand the gravity of the situation?
"Miss Jess..." is all I got out before everything turned black and I was falling into this frozen state. But it was in that state that I found out about my family. It was there that I lost my life. Not physically but emotionally. When I came too, they kept me in another room. This was apparently more "secure" than the previous one. I was numb. My family, my life, the warmth that accommodated my being. Everything and everyone... dead.