~I find myself
despite it all
I find it hard to believe but I am a vampire once more.
I have been diseased for the second time with this curse and I am not happy.
It has been several days since I killed my roommate. The police are now searching for the murderer and I am not a suspect yet though I should be, because she is missing only and they do not know yet that she is dead. I sigh. As a vampiress I require blood. I don't do human. As I mentioned once before. Not that I never tried it before. But I don't normally prefer human blood because it is too rich and pigmented and has a strange flavor to me that reminds me of cannibalism.
This is probably why I did not drink my roommates blood.
I get into my car and drive out to a farm where I purchase several chickens. I take them back to my room with some chicken feed and throw them in my closet.
The next morning, for breakfast, I feast on two of them and their blood. When I am done, I make a chicken dinner with mashed potatoes and gravy. I don't have to eat food but I do enjoy it once in awhile when I am bored and today I was extraordinarily bored.
I hate my life.
I really do.
But there's nothing I can do about that right now.
I missed all my classes.
I don't feel like going anymore.
Essentially. All I can think to do is sit in my room and be bored and waste my own time. I have killed. Yes. I am no different from the idiot Drake was, or the cruelty of the Devil's bargain.
I am and forever will be known as a murderer.
I don't want to think about it but I have to.
I don't want to dream about it but it haunts my nightmares. I have killed in the name of love, just to see Luke again, and it didn't even bring him home to me. I feel badly.
What would mother say if she knew I had killed just to see a boy.
What would my new family say if they knew I had murdered my roommate just to fulfill some pact I had made with the Devil ages ago.
Who was I to become a murderer, when I myself had hated murder and evil so much and only ever and to begin with.
Am I evil?
I am a vampiress once more.
Am I.... evil?