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Veins of Mana

By Moonfall All Rights Reserved ©

Fantasy / Adventure


Darkness crept across the sprawling city of the Eastern Capital as the sun dipped below the western Apalaise Mountains Across the city from mixed tenant homes, noble manors, shop fronts and churches of the Nine came the wavering glow of candle light already flickering against the growing dark. It was soon joined however by a more steady glow of silver light as the watch Magi began their patrols.

The boy, for he could not have been much older than fourteen, rode a dappled grey donkey down to the end of one road. the street was flanked by a manor house and gardens to one side and smaller, but well maintained, houses to the other side. The boy turned his gaze up to one of the metal lampposts, topped with an orb of etched glass. Each glass shpere was a marvel of the city Shapers work, a type of glass that only allowed mana to pass through it when controlled directly by a magi.

The boy held his hand towards the orb, index and little finger extended in a vertical position. He drew in the mana from the orc, then continued his gesture ; A clockwise ninety degree twist, leaving his fingers horizontal, before raising his hand upwards a foot. The seeming simple gesture caused the sphere atop the post to shimmer before glowing with a bright silver light. Similar lamps along the road soon glowed too, the Shaper’s work on the glass carrying the spell along the entire street.

Lady Liadreth watched from the manor balcony as the boy on his donkey lit the street lights before Lunaria manor. She recalled her own time as a watch magi, for she like all the magi that trained in the city, had performed her time as a Watch Magi. Most Magi did the job in their early teens for a year as both payment to the city for their training, and partially to train their control of mana.

As she watched the boy and donkey round the corner, no doubt moving to light another street, she raised a delicate hand. The Lady had been one of the most skilled Watch Magi, as only seven months into her service, her superiors had found that she had been lighting her entire district from a high church tower. This demonstrated not only her ability to use the Light orbs from a great distance, but fine control over her gift of magic.

She held index and little finger extended, much as the young boy had, but she began her pose at a horizontal position. Aiming her hand at the same lamp the boy minutes before had done, she lowered her hand one foot before deftly turning her wrist counter clockwise. The lamp flickered then extinguished its silver glow, It’s twins along the road soon followed. Liadreth smiled to herself at the piece of nostalgia. It had been nearly ten years since she had made that same gesture, and although her skills had developed beyond the need for simple hand signs, the motion had felt refreshing.

Turning away from, the now darkened street, the lady of house Lunaria walked back into her study. A desk lamp lit itself as if by its own accord as Liadreth say herself in a large chair beside the oak desk. She folded her hands as she stared at the orb of murky glass that sat before her on the table.

“Well than,” she whispered to herself, “Time for the show to start...”

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Papito: Interesting premise. Sentences choppy with some not even necessary. An experienced educated editor will help.

Helloitsemily: I am a girl that gets bored easy so does lots of things at once but this was incredible it made me read all of it and not get bored

Ginger: I like the idea behind this; the idea and story itself are great, However, I'm finding typos periodically and some of the sentences could be worded a bit more clearly. You might want to 'show' a little more than you 'tell,'

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