Winter was coming to a close. Farkas was getting used to being back in a body. He had spent the last few months doing simple tasks and thinking. He was looking forward to spring because the warmth would bring the garden back to life. That meant his little flower friend, Amira, would wake up. He had so much to tell her. She would be surprised that he now had a body. He hoped that she liked his new body. He glanced in the pond as if to assess it from a flower’s point of view. He couldn’t tell. Who would know what a flower thinks?
Much of the garden had already awoken and was spreading in all directions. Farkas kept looking at the spot where his favourite friend lived to see if there were any signs of life. Strange. I can’t remember Amira being a late grower. A terrible thought crossed his mind. She isn’t asleep. She’s dead. She’s not coming back. Farkas reassured himself with the memory that once before she had restarted her life as a tiny seed. She will do that again, he thought. She didn’t. She didn’t come back this time.
The summer days were long and warm. There was always a late afternoon sea breeze to sweep away the remaining heat. Everyone in the little town slept with their windows open. The waves, the stars, and the morning birds were the bed mates of all who lived in the village. Farkas had recently invited another bed mate into his home. Her name was Elise. It did not take long for the girls of the village to realise that there was a new resident in the cottage on the hill. He was reserved, masculine, striking looking, and seemed to be entirely single. Elise, being the prettiest and most confident girl of the village, marked him as hers. The other girls knew not to challenge her. She had a young, sleek body, long blonde hair, and an infectious smile. Her conversation style was bright and flippant.
At first, Farkas was not interested. However, he soon decided that it was ridiculous to grieve over a flower-spirit, no matter how close they had been. For God’s sake, he thought, she was a flower and, anyway, she is gone and is not coming back. Besides, he had forgotten that along with a male body comes the drive for a womanly one. Elise was very willing to be that womanly body. And so Farkas lost himself in her.
It was certainly fun. He even managed to forget his problems somewhat. He started to play with the idea that maybe it was maintainable and could bring him happiness. He reached towards her warm, sleeping body and drew it closer. Elise responded obediently although she was completely asleep. He could not help feeling two conflicting ways about Elise. One was simple, gratuitous pleasure. The other was dislike. Farkas didn’t like her. It crossed his mind that he never felt conflicted about Amira. She loved him purely and he responded with instinctive devotion. Amira was really the only place he felt no conflict. He simply liked being with her. As for Elise? He liked her body. He liked her smell. He liked her submissive adoration. Nothing about her scared him. Nothing challenged him. He also found her boring and needy and shallow. She did not love him. She needed him. Her loyalty was to her own survival.
Farkas knew he was no better. He struggled to find enough love to give to himself, let alone someone else. Yet, he thought there must be something inside him because he could love Amira. That love came from somewhere. Farkas’s memory of Amira and his previous life were fading fast. Once he was given a human body, it was surprising that he could remember his other existence at all. For some reason, he had retained his memories, however, they lingered but a while and then moved into the ether along with everyone else’s memories of such things.
After that day with Elise, Farkas could not quite bring himself to invite her into the house again. Even if he could not have love, he did not have to choose some meaningless, second rate version of it. It was better to be alone. In a few months, he happened to pass Elise in the street. She didn’t see him. She was too busy laughing with her companion, looking into his eyes as if he was God. Yes, it’s better to be alone.
Almost everyone in the world of Waldmeer visits other worlds but almost no one remembers it. They may have little, vague memories of things that happen inter-dimensionally, but they usually put it down to dreams, wishful thinking, confused memories, unaccounted knowledge, or synchronicity. Sometimes, people are given the gift of remembering things that happen elsewhere. The older, more advanced souls increasingly remember what they have experienced in all the dimensions.