Iron Manimal

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Chapter 7

Trains are front loaded because of momentum. A heavy caboose will try to crush you or make you jump the rails every time you brake, so we loaded as many of the barrels as we could into the shipping containers toward the front. This is where we packed the generators, propane tanks, and tents that were usually crammed on board The Other Flying Ghost. After our final show of the year, The Other Flying Ghost was always put into a long term parking garage and the tents always came with the train. No one could give me a good explanation why. Even Leon admitted he couldn’t figure it out, but that’s the way his father had done it and his father must have had some good reason we just weren’t seeing, some reason that would jump up and bite us the moment we decided to change. Honestly, I agreed with him.

The rest of the barrels were loaded into the Sweeney’s car, which had the misfortune of being located toward the front. Phil brought out Rob and Rhonda to help us with the barrels but the stationmaster stopped us almost immediately. Those elephants could have heart attacks and die and then what would we do?

“I think I’m about to have a heart attack.” said Dan.

“You’d be easy to carry out of the station.” said the stationmaster.

Work was relatively easy in the shipping containers. They were built to transport cargo. The Sweeney’s passenger car had to be torn apart in order to properly secure the barrels. Sensing the uproar this would cause, Leon had taken them out for ice cream and a movie.

We carefully unloaded their crap first. We’d all been through their car before but it was always mildly unnerving. There were several old doll houses and Barbie play sets and piles of coloring books and crayons that were clearly still in regular use.

“It’s a damn shame.” said Garbageman Mike.

“What is?” asked Dan.

“The Sweeney sisters. I think it’s part of the reason it’s so easy to get mad at them. By all accounts, all three of them are lovely girls, extremely attractive. But you hear them talk and you see this shit and you can’t even try. You’d feel like a child molester.”

“I know what you mean.” said Phil.

“I’ve fucked them.” said Dan.

“Me too.” said Dave. “Are you guys fucking nuts? They’re acrobats. Are you saying they don’t deserve a ride just because they’re stupid? The human race would go extinct.”

“Best ride of my life.” said Dan.

“Which one?” asked Phil.

“I have trouble telling them apart.” said Dan.

“I like Sue best.” said Dave. “She’s a real whore’s whore.”

We worked for awhile in silence.

“Hey Scotty.” said Dave. “What about Lulu?”

“What about her?”

“Crazy is usually good in bed, and she’s about the kookiest chick I’ve ever met.”

“I wouldn’t know about that.”

“You’re shitting me. Really? Didn’t you tell me I should try her honey?”

“Her honey from her bees you idiot.” I was starting to feel depressed. Happy that apparently no one else, especially the Duggans, had been with her, but depressed nonetheless.

“She’s not going to wait forever.” said Dan.

“Look around at the alternatives.” said Garbageman Mike. “She just might.”

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