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Through the Fog

By UndeadLadybug All Rights Reserved ©


The Next Street

A few days after Halloween, I came to school with a jacked-up face. The story is I did something stupid because I was dared to, but I'm gonna tell you what really happened. My friends and I were trick-or-treating when we heard some older kids talking about this freaky haunted house on the next street. 

Of course, we all knew about it already, but we'd never been allowed to go. Something about our parents not wanting us to be scarred for life or whatever. This was the first year they let us go out on our own, so we thought, what better way to celebrate than finally getting to see that haunted house?

We followed the other group to the next street, which was pretty tame, for the most part. Plastic skeletons, fake tombstones, cheap stickers on the windows, you get the idea. We thought we'd gotten our hopes up to high until we hit the cul-de-sac, which was about as creepy as it could get. It was suddenly freezing and covered in thick fog. 

Flashing red, black and orange lights. Slimy, bleeding monsters popping out of nowhere. Distorted horror movie soundtracks blaring from all directions. Whoever set it all up, they did a hell of a job. The house itself tilted to one side, looking a lot smaller on the outside than it did on the inside. Blood dripped from the walls, the way through lined with black, bubbling cauldrons. It smelled like something died, the smallest whispers and creaks echoing back at us.

We thought about turning back, and that moment there was a flash of freaky blue light. It blinded us, the eerie near-silance shattered by screaming. I thought it was all part of the game, but then something big hit me in the face. That was when I knew the game was over. Before the screaming stopped, my cheek had been sliced open, my eye swollen shut. My chin hurt, too, almost like someone was trying to crush it.

I was knocked off my feet, almost relieved when I felt the rough floorboards under my fingers. The cauldrons had gone out when the light faded, I just hoped I was going the right way when I started crawling. The fog had rolled in somehow, making it even harder to see. Before I knew it, I was outside again, except everything had changed.

The house and the fog were gone. I was lying alone in the middle of an empty street. A second before I passed out, a pair of men ran toward me, telling me to stay where I was. Yeah, like that would be a problem. When I came to, I was in the hospital. The cuts on my face had been stitched up and I could kind of see out of my eye again.

A cop was sitting at the foot of my bed, looking more than a little freaked. He asked me what happened, though the tone of his voice made it sound like he already knew. I told him anyway, the poor guy close to fainting when I finished. He gulped, then said there had been a house in that spot at one point, that it had been the scene of a mass murder in the mid-ninties. 

The day after, it had vanished, the still-warm bodies of the victims scattered in the empty street. It showed up in that same spot every three years, and there was never anything they could do to keep people away from it. I was the only one who had ever survived.

So, there you have it, the real reason I came to school with a jacked-up face. It's almost Christmas now, and all I can think about is that house. Will it be even worse when it shows up again, since even more souls are trapped there? Would I survive it a second time? Guess there's only one way to find out.

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E_W_Hemmings: First of all, sorry this review took so long: I've had science mocks recently and then when I came to read this, I made notes to put in the review like I usually do... but then I deleted them. Well done me. As a result, this review is a bit more general than most reviews I write, but hey ho, let'...

Resting-Madness: I've been in love that strongly, that I could see myself in the same situation as Surgio. The slow crawl of desperation was well depicted, I could feel myself leaning close to the screen, like he and I were conspiring together on how to construct this Frankenstein of Adela. And that's written thr...

Tobi Doyle MacBrayne: I was so impressed with this piece. The slow degradation of the main character into a dark and crazy place is beautifully written. I liked that the characters physical descriptions were not described because it gave me a sense that it could be someone I know or love. The grief that breaks the m...

heich: Excellent story and excellent writing style. I hope in the future read your works.The story you present is innovative, fresh, different from everything else and let a feeling that you know you want to read more of it. I hope you continue moving in the same, because he's smart and only you know wh...

Shannon Rohrer: This is probably one of the most imaginative stories I've come across in a long time. You have hooking down to a fine art; every chapter has been as engaging as the one before it, the story unfurling in a way that is easy to follow and paced perfectly for each round of events or backstory. Lookin...

Kiz16: After a truly shocking start to the story, I found the style and content slowed down as the author introduced a varied group of characters who I thought were fleshed out very well. After a slow couple of chapters, I found this story difficult to leave with the tension growing within the house. Yo...

MusketeerAdventure: Well - I really enjoyed this very much! The whole idea of a shared haunting really intrigues me. I thought you did a wonderful job; and I really liked the idea of hearing from the first ghost's point of view. It would be interesting to read more about these two - and the ghost-busters that inf...

Trahelion: While I started this tale hoping for an actual Anthropophagi monster story, I was quickly reminded that humanity is by far the most frightening beast. The reason being, we're real and there is not much we haven't done.Great work here, and at the end, I was expecting the lady narrating to be lying...

Alex Rushmer: I read the first chapter, and I'm not sure I can handle anymore, but I certainly liked what I read. The idea of the drug, Fortis, was very interesting, and I enjoyed how you conveyed its effects. The beginning is very intriguing. I think I'd like to see you do a little more with the main characte...

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