Sanity was Dying

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Chapter 2

How well did you know her? What was she like? Did she have a job ? What did she do at work? What was her interests? And where did her inspiration go wrong? Why ? What happens to these people? Why was she so distressed? How many people especially women wives feed on her?

Was she a call girl ? Did she put it about? What did she do all day? What did she make of her appearances? Did she become socially accepted? Why did she go to University when did she sought help? When is she now no matter besides the point underneath the bed. What we say unable to speak to seek help? Why is she silenced?

A man does not know what happens at home because he hardly at home. When he and Jane got married, she not at home. He had to stir and answer the click of the phone. It is so hard being this beast. He who has been handled so well. Now ditched in his own home. Left it to rot? He rough now had to be smooth. Within a inch of his life he hated.

He has the hurt. Wallowing in some infection he disliked his own image to such an extent. That is because he did do bad and then he did it worse and his wife Jane now illusion.

The man and he the woman staid and sober at home. It is well behaved and it is nice to be them. I am in something called humour because they are the ill wind. Once perfectly matched. The horse has bolted my dear sir. I laughed at him and at myself such shivers of delights that I grew afraid. Sanity it was not sane at all. That did me in.

I am so inclined to be in some therapy and that maimed me because the therapist is just as important as the therapy. When the ill will comes and takes control where is the kid gloves and the beneficial attempt and hardly that when she laughing at me. And that makes me feel bad.

I am they tell me stupid.

We all believe that you are stupid.

“She does not earn any money?” Ha there is a generous laugh. It is all a bit of fun. Someone has just made a beeline for some girl who was shoving up his mate. It is so crass even low class. This arousal of the aristocrats. They have nothing to do. Not as much fun.

What does a woman who has everything want. She wants to know what lower class means. This is what it means. When you have no choice. When anyone can have a go. When meaning to say no they shrug and continue with the whole game. The man taking control of the situation. That is the situation?

He will lead me to my death. Dad does not say anything. This is what the rich are made of. It is so funny. She is broken into. That she is now without cash. Was it you mate? Perfectly innocent. Nor me. She is now not worthy of notice. She has to do all the work herself. Put me down for it too.

He was in somewhere land. Called the cocoon land he did not even note it. That it passed him by. What got him? I thought in somewhere else some other dimension some other thought. He was he there and somewhere. He was where?

“Why? She stupid?” asks dad whose religion is money.

“My daughter has no sense. She is nonsense. She does not have a money brain. This is what most people now have brass.”

"I do brass rubbing at church dad."

"Wonderful. Did you steal the brass itself."

"I got some paper."

This is what you have loved more than me more than us? Said dad in some consolation. He the consolation prize. I priced myself more than a shag and what had I done? I was done for.

“Art is nothing it is all about money. We must copy. What you do and then earn. Be useful. Make more use of it.”

"I should win the bravery award for being in this beastly café."

"If you don't like it there is some other options."

Mother grins in some know how.

"Number 17 is wasted on her."

We all looked stunned. I think my face expresses this more than theirs it is because did not know how low they had sunk.. I can’t even think what I was loathing them or me. For having to be where I had been placed by life. My circumstances now, I hated them and wished they would all leave us to starve in peace.

Where was the protector?

"He is here your dear dad."

"Go away dad not now."

"You will be sorry."

“We do not care to be served by you at all.” Said the customers a whore a whore they jeered.

So, the gang went into action. Doing their degree and doing the note taking and most got on in life. It is with sorrow that the knife crime went up? But that is not your dad? Hotels just around the corner. A description matching one of him or his friends so what? It was not him he is an honest hard-working man.

He has a job works all hours.

He had so many nice surprises. I had a whole lot of worst nightmares.

James came back glowing with romance and fine living. I wanted to say something did not. I stayed silent there was no feelings left just that. He did not see or feel my sorrow. I did not want his pity.

He got on my nerves coming looking so refined. I wanted nothing more to do with him.

My lover has become my ex. That is what this is all about I told myself. I shook myself. I was not the first to have lost on love. The thing was that woman was destroying the business too. She had to have everything from me.

It was Jane who crept and said this is a haunted cafe. All the customers fled. It is a creepy way of saying that and due to staff shortages we were going under.

I wanted to tell the guy. But he so happy with that and he deserved all that she will bullshit him. I was going to enjoy being a ghost. I creepy crawling with the emotional backlash of being the lost in the queue. Wept all the time.

But she did not leave. His side the dishy man took on the mantel of the husband. Who would not believe it now. There was not much to seek in him. He had to shag his wife at the precise moment. He had to be where he could be found at his desk. He dreaded her jealousies as punishment intense. And at that certain time, he had to catch a plane. And that certain time he had to do this and that. When in the café he had her and his phone for company.

“It comes down to it love anymore or is it this disaster waiting to happen.”

“The policeman came saying if I hurt anyone I would be charged.”

“I was so frightened had the jellies.”

She must have sent them. I was over wrought nerves. This made her nervy? My God these creeps have everything under control.

The thing is when they are robbing the police are helping them.

Yes, damn right. The damn cop came telling me he the head or something. He was in charge. I must be good and gave me advise where he would put me. I got damn good at serving him out of the shop. I sat it out when he left.

He asked for something he did look slightly off. I made sure I made sure I had not broken the law.

She sure was busy? She took herself seriously I could see that now.

She did it with the barrels. She was so good and used the whole system.

"What a woman." He crawled.

He said all is fair in love and war.

“When I nearly got done in for sure. They did ask me out. I was free available but they just wanted the shag. The company of men they did take no for an answer. Because we now this creep show and there were no customers. No money and this half mad me waiting on tables on tablets. I make no apology for that. She got what she wanted.

He encouraged her by saying all is fair in love and war. It was as if he waved the banner. He liked to be courted he told us both. Whoever wins he would marry. She won so she got him. He a man so involved with his own side of things, he destroyed us.

He did not want me anymore?

No most definitely he asked for her all the time. He not involved with the show. He did not see the side show. He did not know what was happening. He disliked my growing rudeness and petulant manner. He did not know why it was.

He did not only not ask me but in a cursory manner. How is the flesh and how is the bone. He did not see. His happy thoughts made him blind to all else.

When at nine I had been narrowly raped. By dad who else. Than when I grew up he thought that people change. But dad was waiting under disguise disgusting and wasting everything that stood in his way.

What he does not know once the victim is earmarked that victim is always in danger. He did not see. He disliked unhappy thoughts he did not want me to be sad. He fond of me but that made me a what? You see? He asked time to think it over and then when time passed. His thoughts went to the same brood because she made him not sad but happy. She normal she good in bed.

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