Doggio´s Eyes

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After we walked up the stairs to the terrace leading up to Vincent’s house, we found out that it wasn’t there anymore. Everything was completely torn down. Only the heavy metal hatches of Vincent’s Laboratory were still there. Doggio was lying on the terrace with a wound on his ribs. He was still breathing.

‘God damn werewolves…’ Vincent said.

‘But who would fall in love with Doggio?’ I asked. Doggio grunted in the blood. ’I mean... what human would fall in love with Doggio?′ I said but Doggio just kept on grunting. ’I’m sorry for things I don’t mean to say Doggio, King of Kings, for I know they are meaningless,′ I said and then Doggio stopped grunting.

‘Maybe it was someone who was in love with Ann Frankenstein,’ Vincent suggested.

‘Who might that be then?’

‘My dad.’

‘But I thought you shot him!’

‘I just shot his kneecap so he couldn’t go anywhere and then I knocked him out. After that I decided that it would probably be safer to wrap some tie-wraps around his wrists before I could get to Frankensteining the fuck out of him.’

‘You want to see what’s in there?’

Vincent flipped his knife up and I drew the gun out of his holster.

‘You better have silver bullets in here.’

‘That doesn’t work. The silver is a transitional thing through which your energy has to flow and it can’t do that if it’s not connected to your skin while it touches the werewolf.’

‘You live you learn. Why don’t you kill this fucker Vince?’

Vincent walked into the laboratory. ‘It’s already dead! And so is Buck, I think. Buck? O no his still breathing.’

I walked in. Ann Frankenstein was gone but there lay Ronnie, half turned and everywhere were chunks of fur and puddles of blood. Buck had his silver pizza-cutter in his hand. In the corner of the Laboratory lay Vincent’s dad, tight up and passed out. ‘What the fuck happened here?’ Vincent said.

‘That’s a riddle I can’t solve either.’

Vincent got a glass of water from a sink in the corner of his laboratory and threw it in Buck’s face. Buck opened his eyes wide and said:


‘What happened here Buck?’ I asked.

‘Get me the fuck out of here, get me double whiskey and a smoke and I’ll tell you all about it but not until then!’ he said as he calmly walked out of the Laboratory. ‘Oh,’ he said, ‘here’s vodka, that’s good enough for me. Gather round kids and I’ll tell you the heroic tale of what the fuck happened here,’ he said as he sat down on some of the rubble with the bottle and lit a smoke. We sat in front of him.

‘Alright, so I said I would come over here to see you and I did. But then I saw the glass was broken. Also, a big pile of shit that your dog was sitting next to. I thought that broken glass was probably from the party but you can never be too careful so I got out my pizza-cutter and went in. I saw some hole in the floor and I wondered what was going on in there so I went down there. And what I saw there! I saw some fucking abomination! I saw some kid having sex with some tight up chick, while some bleeding old fart was dying on the floor. Now this motherfucker that was fucking... something was happening to him. All these hairs were growing out of his back… So, I thought that was you two and that Vincent was a werewolf like in Twilight or some shit. But when that motherfucker climbed off after I walked in, he looked nothing like you. He was all blond and shit and he had an eyepatch and he looked at me with these big fucking blue eyes that were like ALL BLUE and he said ″run″ in some crazy voice and I said ″What the fuck have you done to my cousin you fucking abomination of nature?!‘’ and he said he was defending your honor, that he has killed the King of Kings and that he was going to kill your vampire boyfriend. I didn’t know what the fuck he was talking about and so I told him to get the fuck out right now but he ran up to me so I slit that motherfuckers throat with my sixteen-karat motherfucking pizza-cutter! I wanted to walk out of there but I slipped over the blood and I must have fallen on my head or something. There’s blood on there but I don’t know whether that’s mine or not. I can’t taste the difference. He, what the fuck happened to your dog?’

‘So, Ronnie is also a werewolf?’ Vincent said, ‘Of course, he was in love with you Sam... and he... it’s kind of arrogant that I didn’t even think of that now that I look back on it.’

‘You can at least pride yourself on being the most arrogant person in the world and be arrogant about that I guess.’

‘It almost never happens that there is a werewolf and now there were two of the fuckers...’

‘Did you ever do cocaine Vincent?’

‘Yes. What about it?’

‘Well, I’ve never done cocaine but I’ve seen people on it and I think that might just explain the taste of Tygo’s blood.’

‘Your right Sam,’ Vincent said for the second time in this story and then his phone rang.

‘Vincent. Yes. Good,’ he said and he put the phone back in his pocket.

‘What is it?’

‘That was Kharkanov. He has taken Ghargatron’s advice.’

‘Wow, can you turn my dad so he can heal? He’ll get out of his coma and we’ll all hunt the wolf together!’

’But I want to grow old with you, not with your dad…’

‘I know but how else could I be certain he will wake up.’

Vincent sat down by Doggio and looked into his eyes. ‘You did good boy. And now we also know that it’s good enough to get fucked by a changing werewolf in order to become one. We didn’t know that before. Let’s hunt it all together, you, Sam and me… and Sam’s dad! Now I don’t know Sam’s dad but if she wants to turn him instead of her, he must be a WOW! What the fuck is that! WHAT IN THE...’

‘What do you see Vincent?’ I asked as I sat next to him and looked at Doggio’s eyes. They looked like normal big brown Rottweiler-Beelzebat-Wolfdog eyes to me.

‘My God no!’ he said.

‘What did you see Vincent?!’

‘Your dad... uhm... he is in great danger. I have to go to the hospital now. I’ll have to turn him now. I’ll meet you here in three hours,’ he said as he ran down the stairs.

‘Vincent!’ I yelled.


‘Be careful.’

He ran up to me, quickly kissed me on the mouth and ran down the stairs. I saw his Lexus race over the road and disappear into the landscape. Buck stood next to me. ‘Let’s get the fuck out of here before that fucking werewolf comes back,’ he said.

‘But what about Doggio?!’

‘Alright. I’ll carry Doggio,’ Buck said as he tried with all his force to lift Doggio off the ground. ‘We can’t go anywhere. Whenever that motherfucker comes back, I’ll just fucking slice it with my motherfucking sixteen-karat motherfucking pizza cutter!’ he said as he got that thing out of his pocket again and held it in some sort of Ninja position.

I laid down before Doggio and I looked into his eyes, hoping I could see something but they stayed the same. ‘You’re the King of Kings Doggio... and you’re my dog... and you’re the King of Kings...’ I kept on whispering to him. ’We’re going to hunt Ann Frankenstein Doggio, werewolf or not...’, and then I saw something. It was Vincent. He walked into the hospital. I saw him say something to a doctor, then he gave that doctor a roll of money and he walked on. He walked in my dad’s room. I hadn’t seen him since the accident and I didn’t want to. He looked horrible, with all sorts of tubes and wires attached to him. And then I saw Vince pulling the plug on him and he casually walked out of the hospital. ‘I see a car!’ Buck yelled.

‘Then it’s probably not a werewolf.’ I said.

‘How do you know?’

‘Because they move faster without them.’

‘Maybe it’s for disguise.’

‘It’s probably not but we have to defend Doggio, he is the King of Kings so get your pizza cutter ready!’

‘OK,’ Buck said and he took his ninja position again.

‘Something is not right with you is there Buck?’

‘I can’t feel fear.’


‘Nope, never felt it. I didn’t make a big deal out of it either. I never really understood what fear is for.’

‘Entertainment I guess... but my father... I just saw Buck, in Doggio’s eyes that Vince...’ and just as I said that, he came walking up the stairs.

‘I have to tell you something Sam. When I got to the hospital to protect your dad from what I saw in Doggio’s eyes, I heard that he had just peacefully died in a coma,’ Doggio was making a low sound when he said that. I saw a piece of wood on the ground that seemed sharp enough. ´I have a surprise for you Vince,′ I said.

‘I don’t want anymore surprises Sam.’

‘You’ll love this one. Just close your eyes,’ I said and Vincent said: ‘OK’ and he closed his eyes. And just when he did that, I grabbed that stake and jammed it straight through his heart. His eyes shot open. ‘Why?’ was the first thing he said and then he fell down straight on his back. I saw that his eyes were still open and he was breathing heavily.

‘You killed my father!’ I cried.

‘I’m sorry... I had to... I saw him in the eyes of the dog and I couldn’t let him be a vampire!’

‘Why not? Because he’s gay?’

‘You don’t want to know Sam. But it’s not that. You don’t want to know!’

‘I kind of do Vincent. I kind of do,’ I said as I wiggled the stake in his heart.

‘AAAHH! Shit! No.... you don’t want to know... just... promise me you won’t look in his eyes Sam! It’s just that... WE DON’T WANT HOMOSEXUAL VAMPIRES SAM!’ I looked at Doggio and Doggio’s eyes were shining a red glow over me. He had gotten up and was sitting there.

‘DON’T LOOK INTO HIS EYES SAM! DON’T LOOK INTO HIS EYES!’ I went to the dog and sat before him.

I saw my mom leaning over a tombstone, she looked like she was getting fucked and enjoying it. Then the film in the eyes of the dog zoomed out and I saw that my dad, as a monk, was fucking my mom. Vincent was right; I did not want to see that. But I kept on looking. He got off and handed my mom some coins. I saw my mom walk through a medieval city. She walked into a little wooden house. There was a very big and hairy man there. Then I saw him fucking her. I saw a baby being born. I saw the baby grow up. I saw people throwing tomatoes at her as the toddler walked down the street. I saw my mom, dressed in lumps, talk to my dad as a monk again and I heard a very loud whisper in my head, it was my mom’s whisper: ‘witch’, was that word. The kid grew and grew and then I saw that it was me. I saw them cut my eye out. I saw Mathilda scream but I could not hear her. And then I saw it. ‘No....’ I whispered. I saw my dad sitting on top of me in the clock of Sodom. ‘NOOOOOOOO!’ I screamed, ‘DOGGIO! BAD DOG!’ and I ran to Vincent. ‘Vince is there anything we can do... Jesus Vince.... I... Jesus...’

‘No,’ said Vincent, ‘Barabbas. Take care of him Sam. I can feel my life drain out of me. There is not much more than a minute left. Look under the sunscreen of my car. You’ll find something to remember me by.’

I looked around for SOMETHING and I saw that Buck just stood there, crying. Also, I saw a white package on the terrace that the mailman must have left there while we were away. I ran to it, unpacked it and gave it to Vincent.

‘You bought me a zippo!’ he said with tears in his eyes, ‘That’s the coolest gift in the world! Only the coolest people in the world know that! And it has Mozart’s face on there with Mozart above it and it’s beautiful! It’s so funny... I...’

‘Look on the back sweetie!’ I cried and Vincent turned the zippo.

‘Yes! You say yes!’

‘I say yes Vince. I’ll always say yes to you. It’s both a blessing and a curse but I couldn’t live if I wouldn’t.’

I felt myself get pushed to the ground by Doggio. I couldn’t look away and what I saw in his eyes was the most horrible thing: I saw Vincent cutting open the heads of dogs. I saw a pile of hundreds of them, dead. I saw a white wolf with red eyes. There was something strange about it but it was the most beautiful creature I had ever seen. Then I saw Vincent shoot it. And I saw Doggio in Doggio’s eyes, grunting. But then I suddenly saw Vincent’s dad, in the Laboratory, and I saw myself cut his heart out and walk out of the Laboratory with it. I got the stake out of Vincent’s heart and placed it in the hole. Doggio barked and got off me. I got Vincent’s knife out of his pocket.

‘What are you going to do Sam?’ he asked.

‘Heart surgery,’ I said and ran down the stairs. My leg hurt like shit. That’s what you get for not listening to Waking Dove, I guess. Ludwig screamed harder than I had ever heard anyone scream as I cut his heart out while he watched. It’s what girls do best. I ran up the stairs and pulled the stake out of Vincent’s heart and jammed his father’s in there. Vincent seemed dead. He didn’t respond at all. ‘Vincent!’ I screamed and then Doggio pushed me aside, put a paw on the heart and started massaging it. He lifted his paw and just like with the bullet the day before, the hole started vanishing. Vincent got up slowly. ‘I love you so much little bloodcowgirl of mine!’ he cried.

‘Bite me Vincent,’ I said and I felt his long, sharp fangs penetrate my neck. It felt wonderful. I saw Doggio sit before us, looking up at us and he wagged his tail.

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