Memento Mori

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The story of a neurotic adult male named Phineas Hines. Phineas has a mysterious illness and lives with his overprotective parents. Exhausted with his tedious life, Phineas is desperate to press the 'refresh' button. He soon meets an unusual woman through a social media group. Her username is Memento Mori, and she claims to be a 289-year-old vampire who is hunting a deranged historian that's desecrating corpses.  Phineas is suspicious of his new friend, but because of her bewitching personality and her similar lunacy, he travels to the Big Easy to revitalize his life. Memento Mori ends up changing it in ways he never could have ever imagined.

Horror / Other
Age Rating:


I was twelve the first time I kissed a girl. Mom had to go on set to film an advertisement for 'Put On Dem' Boogie Shoes', a 3 cassette audio collection of funky disco hits for the amazingly low price of $19.99. She dropped me off at Alessandra's house, her friend she grew up with in Vermillion. Alessandra had a daughter named Cauliflower. Yes, like the vegetable. Alessandra was a respected green chef at a restaurant with a plant-based menu, so she thought it was only appropriate that she named her daughter after produce.

We called her Flower, because being named after a creamy-white, brain-looking food was traumatizing for a twelve year old. Flower and I were close. We would set up easels and paint pictures in her backyard. We would knot friendship bracelets and go on bike rides together. We even made up a pretend language that only the two of us understood.

Everything always felt more exciting with Flower. I even started to like things I hated because she liked them. Slap braclets. Weird necklaces. Wite-Out manicures. It's crazy what a heart blinded by adolescent love can make you do.

I'm embarrassed to say, but we were "playing house" that day. Flower and I were pretending to be parents to two beautiful composition dolls. We were in the moment, celebrating our amazing make-believe parenting skills, and I suddenly went in for a kiss.

It was a disaster.

I did everything so wrong. I went in too fast. I used my untrained tongue. I was mostly just licking her lips and narrating the cringeworthy scene. The worst part was that I ate a peanut caramel candy bar before I visited.

Flower was severely allergic to nuts and it triggered a bad reaction. Alessandra made me walk home and immediately drove her daughter to the emergency room. I never saw Flower again. My mother never spoke to Alessandra again.

Mom belittled me and told me I shouldn't be kissing girls. She said I didn't have the emotional maturity yet. Dad just snickered and shook his head. I'm pretty sure he called me a moron under his breath.

"It's completely natural for girls to make you happy in your pants," mom blurted out. "It means that your penis is working properly."

I remember wanting to crawl under a chair or behind the toilet. Anywhere tight or confined to escape the embarrassment.

"There are two kinds of kissing. Family kissing and mature kissing. Family kissing is a kiss on the cheek and mature kissing is the impurity you forced onto Flower."

I know mom was always looking out for me, but she had an exceptional way to wreck my self-esteem.

I didn't kiss anyone for a long time after that.

I guess what I'm saying is, people - friends, partners can make your life feel better, but there's always going to be that one special someone. That someone you may bump into so unexpectedly, they instantly make you feel a spark in your soul. They take you and your heart by surprise and then change your life forever.

This is my story. This is our story.

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Further Recommendations

Suzan: I love this story. This is truly one of those books that you can't put down. It really is that good. You are included when I say, you need to read this story!

darling61rivera: Wonderful book I couldn't put it down till I finished it all. I usually don't cry reading but this one but it was heartbreaking. 👍🤩

Christina Kontogianni: A book is good if you are sad when you finished it. And I was sad 🤪

magersdk91: Absolutely loves this story it made laugh and cry

scarbrough71: 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Holly: Another amazing novel ♥️ I really enjoyed reading your novels ♥️ and love them 💯

shou<3: Oh my GOD, WAS THIS GOOD.I have absolutely no words to describe this. Incredibly exciting, well written, beautiful but also kinda sad at the end. I feel bad for Joelene.. I wanna see the future though, I read this is half an hour and was hooked till the end. Kudos to the author!!

Esma Avril: What can I say. You, the writer did it again. This book has all the things to draw you in and make you not put the book down till the end. Thanks for sharing your talent. I enjoy reading your books. Hoping for one about Daniel and Randy, also Beck.

More Recommendations

ayoooobroo: This is very real and relatable and I truly love that in the story's also everything a hopeless romantic could want lol good job, keep it up.

maggiev8mv: I enjoyed this story. You keep the pace going and added lots of plot twists.Only criticism would be there are places more detail would enhance the story. But that's just my opinion. I'm off to read the next story. Thank you for sharing

suzipuzi: will you continue with the story. very good book

Jasmine Morales: Never had I loved such a series of books. That I can read over and over again and not get tired of it. I loved reading this book and the rest of the books that had in relation to this one. Definitely keeping this one and the others in my playlist. 100% recommending this book to others. 👌🏼😍💕

Connie White: 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊🙏🏻

maggiev8mv: I enjoyed book 1, book 2 freaking loved it. A tad predictable, but the writing style and storytelling skills made up for it. Thank you for sharing your story!!! Now Book 3!!

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