While everyone was kissing and dancing there inside this house inside my skin. They were doing something difficult something beastly somehow wrong.
Let it slip let it down there is something underground let it come out. Let the air freshener in and let the bad odours go. Leave the house as you found it not at all clean it tidy it and make it nicer but they come and they leave nothing but rubble. It is a state of flux and there is nothing but mess and the tidying up goes on and on. Leave it alone there is no one else to clean the mess up.
"You threw us out of the house you threw me out. You did something wrong I had nowhere to go. You did not protect me."
The things which they did not realise was they had done something wrong and I had done something wrong too. Because when they left the house auntie was there waiting for them with her beastly son. I thought I had made them honest and leaving them to work and play and do the things which seemed normal would make them safe.
As I said dad was a schizophrenic and he had violent episodes did bad things and went mad with the stuff of nightmares for he had killed a man. He just did not get along with his own self and the girls in their under pants masturbating was enough to drive him mad. They did it on purpose as I noticed.
The things he did was to stay away from such stuff because he could get hurt. I had locked him inside the larder and he remembered the ordeal no that came later. Seems to be always mis- remembering the thing was he did not look then. He always looked when the victim came out.
He just was somehow a man who loved to look at victims and attack them finish them off. Glossy dolls with their huge bosoms made him smile. I worried incessantly they were vulnerable these two girls and they did not even want to know the reality of the whole set up. In the end they married the set up and became the permanent fixtures inside the mafia calling themselves the female mafia.
Mistake happen we all know the bogey man does not exist we all know that there is no such thing as vampires we all know that we do enjoy ourselves more than any other generation.
We had the Covid we died and now we believe again we can leave our money out to sea and somehow spend it because we deserved it.
Amber light says stand still, red says stop and green is to go. We are all in love at some periods in our life and when that happens there is nothing to worry about. Just leave the house as you found it. The fool inside the house did not realise that you had gone and it madden her thought it her own fault. The double lives of today is that the doubts which she had about herself the things he did not think about. Alcohol made him. Like mother's milk. He then began to drown in it.
Double lives are not the thing.
We are now more able to do doubles than at any other century.
We can fly and do the boat rides and then we can do the rides and riding higher than that we went to the moon to return much better. We are able to behave well towards each other.
"We are bombing this and that country because they are not one of us."
"Our difficulties is we are not able to see anyone else's point of view."
"He has nothing to do all day."
"So we set him up."
"She doesn't have sex with us so we are going to make an example of her."
"That is me?"
"Yes we are speaking to you."
We do not now think we only want and want. See there is something else there is the sense we were born with. Now it is we have the cesspit of the mafia inside us. Inside us there it is said.
Let it be said we are not silly at all.
"We are very serious people with the thoughts and feelings and the work loads and the time keeping. We do nothing but that. We enjoy ourselves we go to the beach and have the times and the pleasures and then we speak to the house keeper and say good riddance.
In fact we can clean our homes now. We do just that to much cleaning has matured us all. Look we have become grey with it all.
The clocks unwind and we are dead.
"We did nothing wrong we just went and enjoyed ourselves."
The female mafia saw the opportunity was knockers and did just that we will kill you all with the pleasures."
"No one will notice that,"
"So my sisters were married off to the men and the aunts who were into them and they all lived happier lives."
Such a lot to take in.
"We love to read it some time."
Let us say this is fiction let me say it is almost fiction. Let it be known no one knows whom I am speaking about.
"What is it sis?"
"You were 19 years old how could I have allowed you to have an affair with dad?"
"We were smitten with the ideology."
"Satanism is wrong?"
"It is not wrong it is what we have it is all that makes us. Our genetic make up speaks and seeks the likes of someone in the family. Our flesh. You are not family."
"You do not now have the vote we have cast you out because you are not us."
"You threw us out because we wanted sex with the whole family."
"That was wrong?"
"Who is to say it is. I am now in something called that way inclined. I am having sex all the time with everyone and my husband doesn't mind."
"I am earning my living playing doubles."
"I am not I am stuck indoors trying behave."
"Well you are boring sis. We are now successful. You are not we are what God made us. We were envious before now we have men and women and it is never dull."
The people that I used to know and protect were now resentful and filled with something called sexual curiosity and envy. They had somehow lost their souls in something called early activities which made them oblivious to the feelings and privacy of others.
That we were somehow connected no more that the family was now no more. We were dislocated disconnected waiting in front of the television the walls the prison which we had no idea of behaving like prisoners inside we were in some hostile behaviour.
We had no money we had nowhere to go. We were there hostile and there. Inside the house doing the seeming normal thoughts and processes. I was not allowed time to do the things I wanted.
There was simply no time because had to behave had to look out for others. There did not appear to be anything or anyone for me. I had refused three offers of offensive marriage and someone had suggested yet again that I share the bunk bed.