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Phil Osafa's Stoned

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Summary

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ "Clever character redevelopment." - Melbourne News ---- A humorous retelling for a different era. Who is Phil Osafa? What do The Dissentry of Magic do? How do you persuade your (drinking, gambling, thieving) weenix to behave like a respectable owl? What is ditchwitch? And why can't girls play? How do you tame the tiny, ugly, vicious - yet strangely desirable - beast on the third floor? The answers are waiting inside this clever little file of fluid locations... Barry's uncles, Vermont and Patrice, are petrified of all things magical (they don't mind the tax avoidance part so much) and try everything to stop him from taking his rightful place at Pigsnorts School of Wizardry, Witchery, and Judicial Evasion. With the help of wild, magical giant, Rumorous Haggard, he begins to learn of a world beyond Muddledom. New friends, Don Wheezeasy, Penelope Perfect, and Hermainly Grunger join him, lifting his spirits (Breville Shortass being more of a dampener) and an incredible adventure is about to begin! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ "Camp innuendo frivolity, à la Benny Hill, Carry On, etc, intertwined with ridiculous Pythonesque slapstick. But still manages to recreate the atmosphere of the original. Loved it!" - The Fantasy Review.

Genre:
Humor / Fantasy
Author:
Chris Whyatt
Status:
Complete
Chapters:
19
Rating:
n/a
Age Rating:
13+

Copyright/Foreword/Strange Beasts

All Rights Reserved

Chris Whyatt is human, apparently, and no forms of Artificial Intelligence were used to create the ideas, locations or characters in his works. Nor will they ever be in future publications.


To all writers of familiar fantasy using previously tried and tested ideas, situations, characters, and stereotypical dwellings. Only the names change. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to reinvent this onefor the pleasure of a different mindset.


Strange Beasts and How to Avoid Them*

In a magical world, anything is possible.

In a normal world, the extraordinary is highly unlikely. Hence, vastly more probable…

You’ll believe an emu can fly great distances.

You’ll believe it can rain frogs.

You’ll believe that a dragon guards the vaults.

You’ll believe that a woman (admittedly, a stern-faced woman) can morph into a wildebeest.

You’ll believe that a mangy cat can morph into a scantily clad seductress… who also makes a very nice brew.

You’ll believe in a mythical bird. A mythical bird who has returned, not so much from the ashes, but quite possibly the pub.

But! This is just a fantasy book—not a book of miracles. So please, don’t for one minute believe that Michael Halibut (met. hon. pub. nme.) can forecast the weather.

*Keep away from Whittlespoon public houses. Especially the one in Norm Alley.

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Further Recommendations

JuLȧȧy Je-s'ȧmour Chiffettȧ: This book definitely could be full length and I would binge read right through!!

loriharper1970: Wow a very intriguing story. Can't wait to see what happens.

SkyZix_: Tout est très bien dans cette histoire j'adore

paylox: An enjoyable short insta love story. Was great for my lunch break.

melissege: L’histoire est intéressante avec des rebondissements j’espère que sa ne se termine pas sur une fin comme ça, car il y a plusieurs sujets qui doivent ou peuvent être approfondis, avoir comme l’histoire évolue mais pour le moment elle me plaît vraiment cette petite histoire

Jodie Hill: Loved it, had me hooked from the first chapter. Cannot wait for the next instalment.

Peetysgirl: I need more. This was awesome and can’t wait to see what happens next to Cleo

Calise: I loved it. I literally finished the book in 2 hours because it was so captivating. Good job author. <3

Cyndi: I LOVED THIS STORY BUT BUMMED OUT cause i wanted to finish reading itI was so into itvery well written alot of details PLEASE finish it!!!

More Recommendations

Kaari: I love the fact that these don't have to be long stories to really get involved with the story and the characters.

RUHI: I loved this, amazing 🤩🤩🤩Thank you author for another wonderful story 🤩🤩🤩🤩

Marie julie: Jolie histoire un peu triste au début mais agréable et légère tout le long. J'ai appréciée la lire.

Susanne Moore: Ugh I hate those bad and selfish people. Can't wait until they all get there butt kicked

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