Pranks, Pajamas and Pretty Bad Puns

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If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport

“I cannot believe dad gave me the iPhone 9s! It’s due to be out in 2020!” Brittany chirped.

“Well Done,” I groaned, rolling over my bed.

“It’s waterproof!” She sang.

“Like your mascara,” I grumbled beneath the covers.

“Shut up. You’re just jealous dad gave a new phone and not you,” she narrowed her eyes.

I rolled my eyes and picked up my iPhone 10s. “You were saying?”

Her mouth dropped open as I smirked. “What happened?”

Her eye twitched as she let out a huff of air and got out of my room, muttering profanities under her breath.

I smiled and flopped back onto the pillow. Ahhhhhhh...peace and quiet-


“Caleb!” I heard Madeline’s voice scold him.


Ugh, so much for peace and quiet.

Suddenly a herd of groaned people walked past my room, yawning and trailing down the stairs.

I mumbled a few curse words and rolled out of bed. I fell to the floor with a thud.

“WHO LET AN ELEPHANT LOOSE UPSTAIRS?!” Caleb shouted from downstairs.

“Shut up,” I muttered as I held my now throbbing head.

I quickly got dressed and went downstairs.

Everyone was sitting at the table by the time I got down. I took the empty seat next to Travis and lay my head against the table.

“Charles?” Travis asked in concern.

I picked up my head and looked at him. “Yes?”

“Hi,” he giggled and stuffed his mouth with a pancake.

“Hello,” I groaned.

My dad entered and his usual suit and tie was replaced by a bright blue t-shirt and jeans.

“Guess what?” He said to all of us.

“What?” Everyone asked in unison.

“We going on a-” he started before I cut him off.

“- trip in our favourite rocket ship, zooming through the sky, Little Einst-“I sang.

“Charlotte,” my father warned. “We’re going on a boat ride!” He exclaimed.

I frowned. “Wow,”

And that’s how I ended up on a canoe half way down a waterfall.

“AAAAHHHHHH!” I screamed as I held onto Caleb.

“AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH,” Caleb shrieked, grabbing on to me. “I’M GONNA DIE!”

I gave Caleb a flat look. “I was talking about the fly,” I said, pointing at the fly on Stephanie’s head.

“Well, I was talking about that waterfall we’re heading towards,” he said, casually.

“Oh,” I said. It took a few minutes for me to register what he’s said. “Wait....” I said, my eyes widening.

I stared at Caleb with a panicked look. He mirrored my expression. “Uh-oh,”

We looked ahead and saw the fall about 6 feet away from us. I closed my eyes and waited for impact.

I had a feeling I wouldn’t make it out alive.

“Charlotte!” A voice said.

“I think she’s dead,” another deep familiar voice said.

“Maybe she’s in a coma,”

Gah, if assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.

“No, I’m pretty sure she’s dead,”

“No way, she’s -”

“I’M ALIVE!” I screamed, jumping up and running around in circles.

I almost lost balance before an arm wrapped around my waist pulling my closer to their body. I opened my eyes to come face to face with someone familiar.

My mouth turned into an o-shape.

“Hi, Jackson,” I said, nervously.

His indifferent stare made me want to jump in a hole.

“Hello,” he replied.

Oh my god. He just replied to me! This is so...urgh...

“Why are you here?” I asked. Wow, Charlotte.

“I don’t know. Why are you here?” He asked, staring at me.

“I was here with my family,” I said.

“So, your dad’s here?” He questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“Y..yeah,” I stuttered. “He is,”

He looked around, pulling me even closer to his body.

Oh my god. His body is so warm.

My arms wrapped around his neck, instinctively.

What are you doing, Charlotte?

I don’t know!

He looked at looked and where my arms were. But he didn’t remove them.

His gaze flickered down to my lips and I suddenly licked them, to keep them moist.

His eyes turned dark at my actions and he trailed a hand up and down my back.

Suddenly, Caleb entered with the rest of my family from behind the bushes.

“Wow...that’s a compromising position,” he said.

Jackson let go of me as I pushed him away.

I stood up and pulled down my skirt.


“Errrr...hi,” I waved, awkwardly to everyone.

My dad was scrutinising Jackson, narrowing his eyes at him. As if he were familiar in some way.

Brittany and Stephanie were drooling over Jackson.

Travis was on his phone unbothered as Caleb had widened eyes.

And Madeline had a smirk plastered on her face. ”Get that dic-” she grinned as I cut her off before she was going to finish that horrible sentence.

“-tionary. You mean dictionary, right? Oh my god, I am so failing English class right now. I really need a dictionary,” I smiled sheepishly.

All eyes were on Jackson now. The lust that had been clouding his eyes were now gone and his signature unbothered look was back.

“Jackson Anderson,” my father said.

Jackson stiffened as he turned to look at my dad. “Mr Ridgewood,”

“How have you been?” My dad asked, walking around Jackson in circles.

So they knew each other.

“Fine,” he snapped.

“What is your relationship with my daughter?”

“There’s none. All I can say is that she’s a scheming little bitch, sir,” he said, blankly.

I frowned at him and stuck my tongue out. Jackson clenched his fists and glared at me.

My father laughed at Jackson’s false statement. “How intriguing,”

“I know,”

“How about you come over to dinner one day,” my father offered.

“I couldn’t do that sir,” Jackson said.

“Why not?” My dad asked.

“It would be a disloyalty to my sister, sir,”

My father stiffened and looked at Jackson.

“Why?” He asked.

Jackson made brief eye contact with me before looking away.

“You killed my sister, Mr Ridgewood,”

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