That Horrible Child

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Little Piggy


Rain was pelting down on the window. My mum looked outside in frustration, shaking her head and glancing at me thoughtfully. I wiped my runny nose on the sleeve of my jacket.

Mum bent down and fastened my buttons. “Can you be a big girl and stay inside while I go to the shops next door and get you some medicine?” I nodded with enthusiasm.

“Yeah I can now, coz I’m this many.” I held up three chubby fingers with a smile.

Mum smiled back, as she dragged one of the dining chairs to the front door. “When I get back I will knock and tell you it’s mummy, then stand out on the lawn so you can see it’s me okay?”


“No matter what anyone says to you, you don’t open that door, do you understand?”

I nodded, as I gently closed the door behind her. My cheeky grin should have been warning enough, especially for my mother.

Within minutes, a car pulled up into the driveway. Through the heavy rain, I could see my Uncle race to the front door and bang loudly against the wood.

“Hello Uncle Bob” I yelled through the closed door. Our house was old and had no porch, so my uncle was standing in the rain, attempting to pull his jacket over his head.

“Kylie, open the door.”

“No, I’m not allowed”

“Kylie, its Uncle Bob, open the damn door.”

I giggled “Nah uh”

Before long, a wet through mum came padding up the path with a smile on her face. I knew she’d be happy with me. She rushed up the front steps and banged on the door. “Kylie, It’s mummy” she then stood in the centre of the lawn and waved.

I waved back and continued to watch her through the glass pane. “Okay, you can open the door now”

“Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin”



“Open the door.”


“It’s Mummy.”

“I know.”

The rain got heavier and both Uncle Bob and my mum were soaked through to their skin, but I still refused to open the door.

“Why won’t you let us in?”

“Because you said not to open the door to anyone, no matter what they say.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s Mummy, now open the door.”

“Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin.”

By the time they had managed to break in through the back window, they were both wet through and cold. I greeted them with a big grin, thinking mum would be so glad that I had actually done what I was told, for once.

“See, I did good mum, I’m big enough to be by myself now”

Mum nodded her agreement and hugged me in her wet clothes, her wet hair stuck to the side of my face. “You did well, I’m proud of you for not letting anyone in.” She rolled her eyes and chuckled. “But in future, always let Mummy in the house.”

Kylie Logic:

I was constantly in trouble for not doing as I was told. This particular day I was determined to behave. I wanted to show my mum that I was responsible enough to be left on my own more often – after all, that’s when you’re able to have the most fun. I am still making the error of taking things literally and continue to get myself and others into loads of interesting situations.

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