Hectic Holiday

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Been waiting for this chapter, haven’t you? I was, do you know how long it took me to write those two chapters? Ages! I hope Patricia is happy. Anyways here’s chapter 3….

We were all sent to pack whilst dad bought the tickets. I honestly thought that we shouldn’t trust him with buying tickets, for all we knew, he would buy us tickets to Australia. I ran upstairs to my room and emptied the contents of my wardrobe onto my bed when I realised that I couldn’t pack a suitcase to save my life. I started packing but halfway through the doubts came flooding in. Do I pack one of everything? Or do I pack two? Would I even have enough space for two of everything? What exactly is everything? I’m hopeless at packing, be it a one night or a two-week trip, I always manage to leave something behind. I remembered the time we went to Scotland and I packed flip flops and a straw hat, although that was purely accidental. I was a mess and instead of picking up my hiking boots I picked up my flip flips. Mum had to buy me a new pair when we were there. to avoid another situation like that, I packed just one of everything and some extra underwear. When I had just finished closing my suitcase, dad told us (well, he shouted up the stairs, that was our method of communication, shouting. It was the only language we could understand) that we were incredibly lucky, and he got us a cheap flight for the next morning. Before I came down for dinner, I looked for my money box, maybe I could buy some Danish souvenirs. I usually kept it under my bed against the wall, but when I got on the floor and wiggled under the bed it wasn’t there. I was ready for war, how dare they steal my money I thought. I took a deep breath, ready to shout and start accusing people when I remembered leaving it in my wardrobe. Before I could go and get it mum called us down for dinner. I’ll get it later, I thought.

After dinner we grabbed our suitcases and lined them in the hallway, ready to take when it was time to leave. We had about three hours until it was time to go to the airport and I decided to take a quick nap. When I woke up, the house was silent. I started to think I had been left behind while my family went on holiday like the kid from Home Alone. But when I went downstairs everyone was passed out in the living room and mum was calling a cab. I felt relieved, but also a bit disappointed, I had kind of wanted to be left behind that would’ve been fun.

So that’s how we found ourselves at Heathrow airport at the butt crack of dawn. Thanks to mum’s “you never know what might happen” attitude we were at the airport and through security an hour early. Oscar, Adam and Dad went to Costa to get us some hot chocolate whilst the rest of us were strewn about on some chairs feeling sorry for ourselves. I must say now that I think back to it we looked quite pitiful as sat there miserably. Sam’s eyes kept flickering to the door as if he was going to bolt any second to catch the first train home and Luna, well Luna just went to sleep.

They came back with a bag full of food and cups of coffee and hot chocolate. my stomach growled, I held my hand out and Oscar handed me one croissant. I continued to hold my hand out and he gave me a hot chocolate. the croissant wasn’t nearly enough to make me full and I kept my hand outstretched there was more than enough food in that bag and I was sure, from the crumbs on his t-shirt, that he had eaten on the way back. He pushed past my hand and continued handing out the food.

“hey!” I protested

“sorry, there’s not going to be enough,”

I waited patiently for him to hand out the rest of the food and saw more than five tuna melts left in there. the bloody liar. He hid them in his suitcase. He was lucky I didn’t like to have fish in the mornings otherwise I would’ve exposed him for his stingy ways. After my meagre hot chocolate and croissant, it was time to get in line to board the flight. We all joined the queue and were getting a pep talk from Dad. During Dad’s motivational speech which made us all even more depressed, Felicity, who was standing slightly out of queue accidentally bumped into the woman in front of us.

Before I continue I must say that this woman was FRIGHTENING. Her jeans were caked in dirt and had rips on the knees. She wore a t-shirt with a large ketchup stain and some brown unidentified slime. Her arms were thick and muscular with a glistening sheen of sweat. She had a black tattoo of a skull with serpents coiling round it and down her arm. You could see rivulets of sweat rolling down her forehead and getting lost in her dense bushy eyebrows that were bent into an angry frown. Shadowed under her eyebrows were her angry black eyes. Her lips were pressed into a tight scowl and she had a sharp pointed chin. I counted over ten piercings with some on her lips, nose, tongue, and eyebrow. Her hair was long, stringy and sat in a messy bun at the back of her neck. It was so greasy it was almost dripping oil and the sweat on the back of her neck didn’t help. There is no way to describe to you dear reader the stench that wafted off of this woman, but I hope you never have to smell it in your life. It filled the air making me want to gag.

“Sorry, “mumbled Felicity not bothering to look up at the woman.

“Excuse me!” the terrifying woman thundered.

Felicity looked up and paled, looking so panicked you could almost hear what she was thinking,

oh, dear lord, I’m going to die!

“Do you seriously have the nerve to push me and not say sorry. HUH!”

“But I did say sorry.” Wrong move.

By then everyone had noticed the exchange and mum and dad stepped in.

“Hey now, I don’t know who you think you are madam but that’s my daughter you’re speaking to…” started dad.

Now at this point, I was pretty embarrassed. Did we really have to start a fight in the airport, in public! I suggested that we just move places in the line. When nobody but Luna and Katie would listen, we three moved to stand behind a nice couple with two children. We watched the argument from a nice safe distance. Mum rolled up her sleeves. Uh oh, things were starting to get messy.

“This is ridiculous!” The woman in front of us exclaimed.

“You would think that those people could at least try to be civilised in public.” her husband agreed.

They turned to us and asked,” do you know those people?” to which Luna who just didn’t know how to keep her mouth shut, replied,

“Nope don’t know them at all, I think that their behaviour is completely atrocious. By the way, my name’s Luna.”

And so, Luna and the couple stood there for the duration of the argument discussing our family’s atrocious behaviour. I wasn’t paying attention to what they were saying as I was watching what was going on, but I did hear a few comments here and there. Mostly Luna’s.

“Disgusting behaviour.”


“Threatening that poor woman.”

When it was time to board, we heard a shout.”

“Luna, Katie, Tia, get over here now we’re boarding!”

The couple looked at Luna with a disgusted look as we all hurried to catch up with my dad. We boarded the plane with our heads bowed in embarrassment and found our seats in silence.

When we got onto the plane I was sat next to Katie and the seat next to me was free. Trying to take advantage of the two hours we had, I closed my eyes and tried to get to sleep. Someone sat down on the empty seat. a familiar smell hung in the air. Dear reader, please do not make the mistake of assuming that the word familiar in this situation means comfortable or has any positive connotations whatsoever. When I say a familiar smell hung in the air I don’t just mean I could smell a smell, I mean my nostrils were attacked, assaulted, battered. I turned to look at the person.

Black greasy hair, black t-shirt, filthy jeans. Oh, if looks could kill.

I’d be dead.

It was only when I was off the plane and in the airport, did I feel safe. I felt like I had gone through a traumatic experience. The worst part of the journey was when Katie who had woken up to the foul smell, whispered,

“Did you fart? It reeks around here, Eugh!” then, to make it worse, she giggled and said, “it smells like that woman,” I elbowed her in the ribs, but she just didn’t get it. “you know, the one that started a fight with Felicity, she reeked!” she paused, “she must really stink if we can smell her from here, unless she’s sitting near us.”

She had no idea.

“Adam? Is that you? Didn’t that woman we met earlier smell rotten!” at that point I’d probably left a bruise on her ribs.

“Ow! Stop elbowing me!”

Katie reached over and tapped the woman on the shoulder,


The woman leant forward and looked at her.

“Yes?” she raised one eyebrow and set her piercing glare on Katie.

Katie’ face dropped, and her smile disappeared.

“Nothing!” she squeaked.

The woman put on her headphones and started playing her music. I wouldn’t call it music as all I could hear was a continuous screaming with banging on drums in between. But to each his own, and anyway I was too scared to tell her to turn it down.

We picked up our luggage and dad made a call to our uncle Marty, so he could come and pick us up. Luna needed the toilet and Mum said that the car ride might be long, so I went along with her just in case. As soon as we stepped through the door I smelt the smell.

“I’m going back,” I said.

“Wait, don’t you need the toilet?”

I was sure I could hold I in.


“Wait for me outside then, we’ll go back together.” She went inside a cubicle leaving me alone outside. I heard another toilet flush.

When I thought about it, no I couldn’t hold it in. I entered one of the cubicles and took my time until I was sure that the woman was gone.

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