Chapter 31 || No Mess To Confess.
My mood has been rather at rock bottom since my grandma’s performance in our house. I’m glad my dad finally managed to stand up to, but the fact that my grandfather let’s himself still being manipulated still bothers me.
Well, you can’t choose your family.
It was hard for me to concentrate in school and I just stared at board, waiting for the lessons to be over. I really wanted to participate but my energy level was too low to even raise my hand.
The fact that Katie’s birthday is today made my mood dropping even more. Normally, I’d be excited to go there because I know that all of my friends will be there, but now ?
I just want to spare me those sympathetic looks and people asking me if I’m alright every five seconds. I’m not alright, I’m honestly not but I can’t tell them without looking like an attention seeking bitch.
The bell rang and I found myself in the middle of a crowded hall way in no time. The whole atmosphere in this classroom was really suffocating, triggering my inner instinct to flee.
Mindlessly, I was wondering through the halls, not paying attention where to go. It’s not like I had to be anywhere since Kyle and Sofía are in the library, preparing a presentation and Jana had to retake a test she missed.
Walking around is better than standing around, looking like a lost sheep. I had a free period and no idea what to do with my time, although my loads of homework grew exponentially with every second.
While I was still being occupied with my struggle to make decisions, I suddenly stopped when I saw Nate and Alex coming out of a classroom together.
I hadn’t seen Alex since our dramatic Hollywood worthy scene in front of the hospital. A feeling of excitement and apprehension grew inside of my chest when I saw him talking to Nate.
Although, one part of me hoped that it’s still not over, the other part knew that it was and it also knew that seeing Alex all the time would make everything worse.
It feels horrible to see the person you like going out with someone else, although I know that he only does that out of a sense of duty.
That is one of the reasons why I admire him so much, because he puts other’s well-being over his own. The thing is that he does it naturally, he doesn’t force himself to do it. It’s just a part of who he is.
This is something I can’t understand because I’m nothing like that. Of course, I’m nice and help other people but it’s not a natural thing for me, in contrary, I often try to find excuses not to do something because I’m a selfish and lazy bitch.
I wish it was different, but, unfortunately, it’s not. Helping others is nice and you feel good about yourself but, boy, things were way easier for me when I didn’t have to take everyone’s feelings into consideration.
I wish I was a little more like Alex or Jana sometimes, being thankful for everything you have, being nice to others just for the sake of it.
I never thought that I’d actually admit that to myself one day but Alex is the only guy I have ever really loved and probably will ever love.
Just when I decided to walk in the other direction, a voice sounded through the hallways, yelling my name.
“Jessica.“, my heart skipped at first, but my body relaxed again when I realized that it wasn’t Alex’ voice.
“Nate ? What are you doing here ?“, my surprised tone wasn’t even fake. I really had no idea why he would enter a high school voluntarily.
“One of the tutors got sick and I was asked to replace her.“, he answered, acting a little weird.
He scratched his head and looked to the floor, back at me and then to the ceiling. “Just say it already.”
“What are you talking about ?“, he tried to fake a bewildered facial expression.
“That you are so sorry for what happened with Alex and Jayla and so on. I saw you talking to Alex a few seconds ago. You don’t have to pretend like he doesn’t exist.“, I assured him but his weird behavior did not change.
“I did not intend to get on your nerves with phrases like that. I’ve experienced something similar to and people pitying you is the last thing you need when you’re in that situation.”
“Then what is it ?”
“It’s about Jayla.”
“Wow, what a change of topic.“, I commented, slightly annoyed.
He rolled his eyes.“No, not like that. It’s not about their relationship, well, kind of but not what you think.”
I was mildly confused by his cryptic sentences and had no idea what he was alluding to. “What ?”
“I believe that Jayla just fakes her illness, but I can’t prove it.”
“What’s up with you guys ? Kyle suggested the same thing. I know she is not a sweetheart, but faking a severe illness like MS is impossible. How would she do that ?”
“I don’t want go all “I’m-studying-medicine-therefore-I’m-right” on you, but the entire course of her illness seems really controlled. She’s having a phase in the most convenient situation possible and does not act according to her illness. I know multiple sclerosis is unpredictable, but sometimes it’s just weird.“, he explained pensively.
“I trust your knowledge, but faking something like that is just almost impossible.“, I replied, not being convinced of what I just said.
Jayla would have the money to do that but this is really random. You do not just walk into a hospital and bribe the doctor to tell your family that you have multiple sclerosis. Why not cancer ? Technically, that would be way easier to hide. I understand his suspicion but this doesn’t make sense.
Let’s just assume Nate was right, I’d flip. I couldn’t guarantee for anything because that would mean she tried to
“Have you talked to Alex about your assumption ?”
“Are you crazy ?“, he blurted out.“He’d never believe me. Plus, this is a pretty hard accusation which I have no proof for. My life would be screwed, if someone found out that I falsely accused someone of faking an illness who eventually turns out to be actually ill. The thing is I can’t just do nothing, it’s so aggravating.”
“What are you suggesting ?”
“I have no idea, I really don’t.“, he sighed, biting his lower lip.
I know that feeling. I had that too back when I was hopeful and optimistic about the outcome of this whole drama, but I have learned my lesson.
“Wait. Is Jayla coming to the birthday party today ?”
“Hm.“, he uttered, thinking. “Yes, actually, I think she does. Alex didn’t want her to go but she insisted, saying that a little distraction wouldn’t hurt her and that she’d be careful.”
“What if we try to expose on the birthday ?“, I proposed.
“I don’t know if we can do that. The only way to expose her is if she confesses her lie and there’d still be a chance that she is actually ill.“, I thought about his words and I knew he was right, but maybe luck will be on our side.
“I trust your instincts and I know Jayla. She’d be able put on a show like that.”
“But the problem is that she’d never come clean about it.“, he replied concerned.
“Then we’ll make her.”