Benjamin Ulysses Maitland-Abyss & Chips BOOK SIX

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Chapter 17

Ben’s head was full of ideas for how to take the submarine out of the Dx4H and rest it somewhere in shallow water but the one idea that kept coming into his head was so far off course that it seemed a bit ridiculous even to Ben. He had to get hold of D-Mac and some of D-Mac’s friends who had boats to be able to make his plan work. Ben dropped his air tanks into the office and connected them back onto the compressor for them to recharge themselves then he bolted up to his room to have a shower and change into some warm clothes. Once he had changed he was bolting back to the office that had a shortwave radio in it to try and contact D-Mac and his unsavoury guests on the Crushed Asian.

‘Amazing and Graceful to the Crushed Asian do you read me over?’ said Ben with the professionalism of a radio announcer and awaited a reply through the static.

‘I hear you Benno and so do the offensive gargoyles sitting next to Gotcha. What can I do for you?’ said D-Mac in a quiet voice back to Ben.

‘.....We need to talk about something D can you come back over to Amazing and Graceful for just a little while I discuss something with you?’

‘Sure Aqua Man,’ and Ben heard D-mac yell over the PA ‘COMING ABOUT’ then all sorts of middle eastern language as the two nasty, ugly, smelly, demented travellers were thrown from their seats onto the deck of the Crushed Asian. ‘Be there before you can say.........’ (Now I could tell you what he said but as it even made Ben cringe with the toxicity of the language, it’s probably best that I don’t.)

Ben replaced the microphone and went out into the reception area to have a cup of tea and wait for D-Mac to arrive....again. Hambone was never more than two huge Irish wolfhound steps behind Ben and Lamb Shanks was nestled in front of the fire chewing the living daylights out of an old tennis ball. Hambone was exceedingly jealous of Lamb Shanks and his tennis ball. He wanted nothing more than to be able to do exactly what Lamb Shanks was doing also. Ben had just settled back into his chair with Raphael wanting more info on the size, shape, hair colour and breast size of the mermaids when he heard D-Macs engine approach.

‘Sorry Raph, some other time mate,’ and Ben heard Raphael snap one of his vines like two fingers snapping in exasperation. Ben left the reception area and leaned up against the dog kennel watching the Crushed Asian putt back toward his home.

‘Wut arr we fugging ear 4?’ said Verandah trying to pull several old rusty fish hooks out of his $5000 Armani suit.

‘Quick stop, don’t panic all will be okay,’ and once again Gotcha moved on the bottle and both Verandah and Sorehead looked at the crab pot at the same time. Any movement over the cash in the bottle was cause for concern for the two ugly brothers. D-Mac thought that they thought Gotcha was maybe going to eat the cash and the bottle at the same time. This was not to be but it made D-Mac grin every time they looked at the crab pot when Gotcha moved. D-Mac slowed the boat to an almost crawling pace and went to the bow to throw Ben a line with which to tie the boat up with and then have some conversation about God only knows what. The two ugly brothers would just have to wait to go ‘nutting’ (netting) as they so succinctly put it.

Ben tied the boat off and pointed up the stone steps to the kennel to have a few choice words to D-Mac about his proposition. All that D-Mac could ask was... ‘Is it a cash job Benno?’ and the reply he got was, ‘Yes D it is!’

D-Mac could hardly contain his enthusiasm to dance around the kennel and it wasn’t until Ben reached out and he felt five firm fingers in his shoulder blade that he curbed his excitement enough for Ben to tell him to keep it quiet, especially from the ugly brothers in his boat. D-Mac nodded his acceptance to the priority of the conversation and turned to return to his boat and continue with his passengers to the destination on the mud map.

Ben went inside to use then phone to ring into town to chase up some very long thick rope and chains that could help pull a submarine off a ledge under the water.

D-Mac set a course for the back of Amazing and Graceful and the boat lurched into a blistering 5 knots of speed into the Loch.

Zillath collected her family, food and belongs and then moved deeper into her cave and hopefully out of harm’s way.

The submarine above Zillath sat in docile stillness on the ledge above the Merrows home while sea shells filled with small crustaceans looked for morsels to eat inside the rusted rib caged interior.

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