Wish Making For Idiots

All Rights Reserved ©

Summary

Have you ever been a situation where you KNOW your wish is stupid? Have you ever stared down a malevolent genie? This guidebook is here for your wish making needs. Learn the basics. Happy Wishing!

Genre:
Humor / Fantasy
Author:
Adam Goff
Status:
Ongoing
Chapters:
8
Rating:
n/a
Age Rating:
13+

Chapter 1

Lesson 1

INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH(S):

It has come to my attention, through the reading of many stories such as the monkey's paw and many "Twilight Zone" episodes, that wishes are more likely to be received by idiots or people who are blinded by desire than those who are such sensible folk as myself. Through the watching of stories such as "Aladdin" or "I Dream of Jeanie," however, one is also able to see a pattern of not making good wishes.

Genies can be tricky. If you rub a lamp or hold an old relic that can potentially grant you wishes, keep in mind that genies and old relics have a vast knowledge of the human grammatical system and know how to find loop holes ridiculously well. After all, being stuck in a lamp or having your soul imprisoned in an old relic for 10,000 years gives you "such a crick in the neck." 10,000 years actually isn't all that long. For genies and old relics, that is. This is, of course, besides the point. 10,000 years is long enough for a genie to know that there's something else he could be doing with his time. Such as studying grammar, mayhaps?

I know what to do in this situation, and I wish to spread that knowledge with the common idiot. Be it that wishes fall upon you, use this guide as reference material. Good luck.

Lesson 1: Determining the trickiness level of the genie.

For now, we will concentrate on genies. Genies are very deceptive. They will act like your friend and then stab you in the back, literally, all while humming to the tune of 'you ain't never had a friend like me.' There are a few dead give-a-ways that can tell you if your genie is out to get you. Emphasis on dead.

1: Cautiously Contemptuous -if they use a monotone voice, or sound tired (If yes, than no go).
2: Sassily Sadistic -Whether or not they use sarcasm (If yes, than no go).
3: Feminine Fury -If they are male or female (Female is almost always a no go).
4: Confidential Con-man -If they will tell you about themselves or not (not going into detail isn't the same as not telling).
5: Horrible Hobo -If their lamp is well furnished (If not, than no go).

(To be noted; No go does not mean to turn them down. It simply means to be cautious.)

If the genie displays any of the negative characteristics listed above, proceed with caution. You can rate their trickiness on a scale of 1-5, 1 being not tricky, and 5 being oh-my-gosh-you're-killing-me. Remember, a tricky genie is an easy way to hurt yourself and others. (Deduct 1 point for every aspect above.)


Continue Reading Next Chapter
Further Recommendations

jh7693: Good story intriguing characters original plot its dif than most v books iv read so that makes it prety good

dreamgurlcute2005: Nice book I need a Alpha like Luke too.

Miss D Lester: Omg love this novel so much

Laura Wylie: This is a really good book so far I have enjoyed it very much considering I wasn't going to read it it has been a very nice surprise so far

Tasha Fernandez: compared to her first work this is a little bit off in terms of how the narration went. how the shifting of POV was at times confusing. her previous work was my favorite... it was clear, the plot was smooth and the feelings it invoked.... left me speechless. but still this work of hers plot wise ...

erin e: The grammar isnt great but the story line isnt bad I wish it came from his point of view as well

Jazmin Rogers: I need this story updated! The author is so good at it. Really let’s you feel what the characters are feeling! Please please update

More Recommendations

Priscilla Abreu: It was very sweet and cute.

Priscilla Abreu: Liked that one too and I'll continue reading. Keep on writing for me!

Manuela Lauschner: I love this story so much.

Grace: Can I help you with your family walking t I am not 19 the same time as the feeling of being in bed wbu I don't know why but I just wanted to let you know that I have been your best friend but I don't know if you want to be my best friend

Cwazykitten: This book was absolutely fantastic. It had an amazing plot, and well developed characters.As a whole l give this book a 99 out of a hundred, just because there were some grammatical errors.

Pamela J Atchley: Wishing that there was more to read

About Us:

Inkitt is the world’s first reader-powered book publisher, offering an online community for talented authors and book lovers. Write captivating stories, read enchanting novels, and we’ll publish the books you love the most based on crowd wisdom.