Wish Making For Idiots

By Adam Goff All Rights Reserved ©

Humor / Fantasy

Lesson 4

Lesson 4: Cause and Effect

Now, even if you judge the genie correctly, form your wish to be loop-hole free, and abide by the standard rules of wish-making, you still might create something disastrous because of your stupid near-sightedness. It is entirely plausible that a good wish turns baaaaaaaaaaaaaad. The best course of action to avoid this is to go through the following checklist to see if your wish will only end badly.

_ Is my wish directly harmful to myself or others?

_ Does my wish create a situation that the comic book government S.H.I.E.L.D. would take notice of?

_ Does my wish mention anything about the world or the universe?

_ Does my wish cause any chain of events that would lead to baaaaaaaaaaaaaad things happening?

(Please do not write checkmarks on your computer screen. If you really want to 'check' the list, then print it out and do it then)

Is my wish directly harmful to myself or others?

Make sure your wish doesn't specify people unless you want something good to happen to them. In which case, make absolutely sure that your wish is absolutely loop-hole free. It's best to not include other people in your wishes at all (unless you are very confident in your wish-making skills. Which you shouldn't be [See title]). You shouldn't be toying with other people's lives period. Nonetheless with something as powerful as a wish, mind you! You should also be wary about how your wish effects you. Think to yourself, "is this the kind of wish I might regret later?"

Does my wish create a situation that the comic book government S.H.E.I.L.D. would take notice of?

No. It shouldn't. To even think about what mind-boggling stupidity the wish of yours might contain, the unfathomable reaches of insanity that dwells within your thought processor, why oh why would you want to be a superher... oh, huh. Yeah, I guess that's a fair point. You can wish powers upon yourself, just be very, very, VERY specific on how they work.

Does my wish mention anything about the world or the universe?

This is a big no no on the wish making scale. Do not make any wish that compares something to, involves changing all of, or involves obliterating something in the world or universe, or the world/universe itSELF.

Does my wish cause any chain of events that would lead to baaaaaaaaaaaaaad things happening?

Think. Through. This. One. Carefully...
Alright. You're done thinking. The correct answer, obviously, is to keep thinking. Think through what could possibly happen as a result of your wish. Think of what you would do in response, how others would react, and incorporate physics into what might happen as a result. Think for a good fifteen minutes or so. The best method for thinking without distractions is to place a pillow over your head as you rest your head on a piece of ice. At least, from my own experience. It works for me!

As a conclusion, JUST MAKE SURE YOU DON'T SCREW UP ON THE WISH. OR ON THE OUTCOME. OR ON ANYTHING INVOLVING THE GENIE.


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