It has been so long since I started missing you. At first I was angry with you but my resolve broke soon and I found myself apologizing to you. Will you ever come back?
As I put my pen down, I noticed the page of my diary in which I was writing was stained with my tear marks. I smiled faintly; it was an everyday occasion now. I cannot think about him without getting my eyes wet. I pulled the tissue from the fancy little basket they had placed on every table in that café and slightly cleaned my nose. As I stifled a sob, a sad smile crept up on my lips as I remembered his words. “You get a runny nose every time you cry.” And I wonder maybe it was my red runny nose that always told him I was crying or was I really an open book to him? Either way, I don’t care now. All I want is just for him to come back and tell me that I have Granny styled glasses.
“Hey?” a voice broke my train of thoughts and I hurriedly pushed the tissue away. I don’t want anyone to wonder why a woman in her early thirties was crying alone. Kids these days think everyone is going through a toxic relationship like them. I inhaled sharply and turned to look a familiar shade of raven hair on an unfamiliar face.
“Are you crying Miss?” She was a small girl maybe of seven years with features familiar to someone very close to me. Raven hair, brown eyes and a cute smile just like his. I don’t know what came into me when I opened my arms and nodded the girl to come in my lap. “Nope Princess,” Princess… It came out so naturally like I used to tease him. Another wave of longing hit me as she looked at me with the same pair of big brown eyes. Her eyes then fell on my bracelet that tiny wolves hanging from it. Her small fingers touched it slowly, maybe with wonder. Then she looked up at me with curiosity sparkling as she asked me, “Do you like wolves?”
I couldn’t help smiling as I nodded.
“Have you read THE RED RIDING HOOD?” She asked as she kept playing with my bracelet, turning the wolves upside down and just merely twisting them.
“Yes I have.” I replied as I wondered what that little ball of cuteness was thinking. I shifted her to adjust her weight but her attention didn’t part from my bracelet.
“Do you believe in werewolves?” there was innocence in her voice but the question she asked opened way too many wounds for me. My hands felt numb as my body froze. It felt as time has stopped and I was living that dreadful day again. Red was everywhere… the smell of blood dominating the caffeine as the chairs replaced the dead bodies.
“I am so sorry Miss Parker,” a voice brought me to the present and I watched with blankness when one of my colleagues took that little girl away from my lap.
“Samantha say sorry. She is the senior researcher here, Ashley Parker. Don’t disturb her.” My colleague Walter scolded the kid as I heard a faint ‘sorry’. I bit my lower lip and raised my eyes to look at her in the brown eyes that always haunted me. So common yet filled with so much warmth. I needed to let it go someday. Everything haunted me. Everything reminded me of him. I couldn’t keep finding his shade in every colour.
I gulped the saliva stuck in my throat as I released the breath I didn’t know I was holding.
“Hey Sam, would you like to hear a werewolf story some day?”