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The Falmouth Saga

By Zachary Halteman All Rights Reserved ©

Humor

The Dramatic Tale of Falmouth

Matt Willis looked at the minuscule map in his hands and felt barmy.

He walked over to the window and reflected on his beautiful surroundings. He had always loved old-fashioned Falmouth with its rotten, racid rivers. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel barmy.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Maureen Humble. Maureen was a considerate volcano with wobbly and skinny feet.

Matt gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was a callous, special, brandy drinker with sloppy feet and fluffy feet. His friends saw him as a dripping, decaying doctor. Once, he had even rescued a worried blind person from a burning building.

But not even a callous person who had once rescued a worried blind person from a burning building, was prepared for what Maureen had in store today.

The snow flurried like shouting tortoises, making Matt worried.

As Matt stepped outside and Maureen came closer, he could see the vigorous glint in her eye.

"I am here because I want a phone number," Maureen bellowed, in a thoughtful tone. She slammed her fist against Matt's chest, with the force of 4028 lizards. "I frigging love you, Matt Willis."

Matt looked back, even more worried and still fingering the minuscule map. "Maureen, I ate your puppy," he replied.

They looked at each other with sneezy feelings, like two mashed, massive monkeys eating at a very forgetful holiday, which had piano music playing in the background and two smelly uncles jumping to the beat.

Suddenly, Maureen lunged forward and tried to punch Matt in the face. Quickly, Matt grabbed the minuscule map and brought it down on Maureen's skull.

Maureen's wobbly feet trembled and her skinny feet wobbled. She looked jumpy, her body raw like a bewildered, blue blade.

Then she let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later Maureen Humble was dead.

Matt Willis went back inside and made himself a nice glass of brandy.

THE END
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Further Recommendations

trippix1963: Not really a big surprise at the end, but it's pretty well written and fun. I liked the characters - they were more developed than in some successful published books I've read. A few typos but I've seen that in published books in the last few years.

deevee: This book was soooooooo amazing... I enjoyed every part of it

Nishchitha Shetty: It's really very simple and cute storyAnd I love the sarcasm........Ur definitely good at jokes....can't stop laughing sometimes Ur pretty good writer love to read ur stories...:)Gooooog job;)

Wisher13: This is a really good. I loved how she changes into looking like a boy. But I think it's way too short and there should be at least 5 or 8 chapters instead of just one.

_AestheticPotato_: I loved this book. It was honestly, hands down, amazing. No lie. It had me feeling all sorts of emotions. Heartbreak, laughter, mad, jealous. You name it. I really like it though I am, no matter what, still #Crace. (Ship name of ColexGrace)

More Recommendations

tinaasante871: when Max first got introduced to the story I was like#where the hell is sara#...lol... I loved every minute of reading this book... it was fantastic although I would have loved to read more about Sara and Allie's wedding.....Anyways I hope u have more of these books installed for us because you'v...

AryaTara: Very fresh and interesting read. I couldn't keep it down for later. I enjoyed the way the story flowed seamlessly. Keep up the good work

ayesha wali: you serioudly need to read as you missing out a great book! the relations between the characters are so beautifully described to perfection that you cant hekp but fall in love eith them! idk why this book isnt published and please write up a sequel!!!!! good luck!

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