The Falmouth Saga

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Summary

A series of short and wacky stories, some of which are set in Falmouth, Massachusetts.

Genre:
Humor
Author:
Zachary Halteman
Status:
Complete
Chapters:
4
Rating:
n/a
Age Rating:
13+

The Dramatic Tale of Falmouth

Matt Willis looked at the minuscule map in his hands and felt barmy.

He walked over to the window and reflected on his beautiful surroundings. He had always loved old-fashioned Falmouth with its rotten, racid rivers. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel barmy.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Maureen Humble. Maureen was a considerate volcano with wobbly and skinny feet.

Matt gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was a callous, special, brandy drinker with sloppy feet and fluffy feet. His friends saw him as a dripping, decaying doctor. Once, he had even rescued a worried blind person from a burning building.

But not even a callous person who had once rescued a worried blind person from a burning building, was prepared for what Maureen had in store today.

The snow flurried like shouting tortoises, making Matt worried.

As Matt stepped outside and Maureen came closer, he could see the vigorous glint in her eye.

"I am here because I want a phone number," Maureen bellowed, in a thoughtful tone. She slammed her fist against Matt's chest, with the force of 4028 lizards. "I frigging love you, Matt Willis."

Matt looked back, even more worried and still fingering the minuscule map. "Maureen, I ate your puppy," he replied.

They looked at each other with sneezy feelings, like two mashed, massive monkeys eating at a very forgetful holiday, which had piano music playing in the background and two smelly uncles jumping to the beat.

Suddenly, Maureen lunged forward and tried to punch Matt in the face. Quickly, Matt grabbed the minuscule map and brought it down on Maureen's skull.

Maureen's wobbly feet trembled and her skinny feet wobbled. She looked jumpy, her body raw like a bewildered, blue blade.

Then she let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later Maureen Humble was dead.

Matt Willis went back inside and made himself a nice glass of brandy.

THE END
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Further Recommendations

Sijile: Such a great pick me up and just what I needed to lift my spirits. A few typos here and there but nothing a quick edit can't fix. Love the storyline.

Columbine Pirouette: Its so entertaining I could not put it down. I enjoyed everything about it and would definitely recommend this enthralling novel.👍👍

Oratile Keabaitse: One of the best we'll constructed novels I have read in a long time. It's all about the pure innocent love story that shows that the world is still a beautiful place to be. Recommend it to all

Ben Santiago: Good quick read that makes you want to keep reading to find out what happens next!

Maureen: Cute Christmas novella. I really enjoyed watching the two main love interests come together and appreciated the lack of smut and yet it was still a little steamy.

bobbi❤: This book was a great read. I enjoyed that this author made the characters and plot realistic and interesting, that I found that I just couldn't put it down until the very end. Now I'm off to reading the sequel!! 😊❤️

Melody Velazquez: This is a great novel. I recommend this novel to everyone. It keeps the attention of the reader. I don’t have any dislikes about the novel.

Wendy Leverton: This is a unique story, with characters you can relate to. There's witty banter, welcome comic relief.

Maiabitcheese: Great story ❤️ love the CD of the FL with all the bullying and moving on. Great new found friendship and love. Perfect mix. Oh and I love Milton 🤷‍♀️♥️

More Recommendations

HamiltonForLife <3: THIS IS SUCH A GOOD BOOK! Need to add more or another like this. Such an awesome plot 😆

jogamaspearce: That was nice reading. Thank you.

BookReviewer88: A actual love story in 2021! Good job!

Ally_kat: I read the next book first and when I realized this was a story I immediately had to get my hands on it! It's such a wonderful story and I liked how there wasn't a ton of drama and it was very realistic with feelings, how busy adults are and the. Simple struggles couples go through after moving i...

Geanina: Sweet story, love it

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