Chapter 1: Prisoner
I laid on the bed while listening to music that I didn't even like, hoping that it'll exhaust the Hell out of my brain and that it will eventually switch off. I put Ariana Grande's song 'One Last Time' on repeat for one last time. I was beginning to have a headache, I can still hear my mind through the awful music. I heard him say, in a aggressive tone, 'Put that off! Make her stop, you're gonna kill us both' I hate to admit that he was right. Yes, I hear a male voice speak in the back of my head 24/7. What's worse is, he has a British accent! Don't get me wrong, I heard dudes who speaks in a British accent and I think it's kinda hot. But to hear this thing speak in a British accent all the time, it grates on my nerves! I put off the music and rolled over to the other side of my bed. 'That's so much better. Why don't you take your pants off, darling? I know you feel warm in that sweatpants." I put the pillow over my head and thought, 'Can he just shut up?!' Now he started again, 'Never darling, you can't get rid of me.' I sighed and tried to force myself to sleep. I hated this voice inside my head. He was rude, he always judges me, criticizes me, makes fun of me, make me feel insecure sometimes, he never gives me a break and he always has something to say about literally everything! He made me feel disgusting about myself when I hit puberty and often commented when I started developing breasts. When I stood in front of the mirror, he'd say something like, "Oh, don't you look like shit today." And when I was naked, "Is your one breast bigger than the other? Sad". He is literally the worst! I remember it very clearly when I heard him for the first time, that was the moment my life became difficult. Because of him, I was known as the weird or crazy child. Before him, people were kinda like assholes to me because of my backstory when I was still a orphan. I'm glad that I got taken in by the Wong couple. A Chinese man and a sweet Latina woman who couldn't have children of their own. My original name was Kitade Khan and they changed my name to Tamika Wong. The nun at the orphanage told me that I had a Arabian mother and a Japanese father, it was forbidden for them to be together. They were hiding but my mother's brother found out where they were hiding. My mother was stoned to death because of their relationship and my father had took me to the orphanage because my mother's family were looking for him. They wanted to kill him too. No one knows if he's still dead or alive. That's something you just shouldn't tell a five year old. I had to deal with that and then this parasitic voice later came into my life. He made life hard for me. Not once has he ever apologized for all he's ever done to me. If he could shut up, then I'd be able to actually breathe. I laid with the pillow over my head and shut my eyes. It was about 3am now.
I woke up to the voice in my head saying, "Rise and shine, sleepyhead. Seriously, get your lazy arse up. You have so much to do today." Why did I have to get up early today? Oh yeah, I had to go to the doctor. My adoptive parents insisted that I should go because of my behavior. I have been acting more strange and grumpy, according to them. But how could I not? They don't understand what I have to deal with. I'm so sick of this voice inside my head. I wish I never had it. I brushed my teeth and tried to ignore the comments in my head about how I look like a dork when I smile. I don't smile that often and even the voice inside my head can agree on that. I remember it like it was yesterday when the voice suddenly awoke in my head.
I sat at the end of the table next to Mabel, she was a beautiful 5 year old African girl. She had coco skin, sharp features, dark brown eyes and ebony curly locks that framed her face perfectly. She was my only friend at the orphanage after our 6 year old Scottish friend got adopted. Erin was a funny child, of course people would want to adopt him. He was just so full of fun and he was naturally funny without really trying. Mabel and I were talking about how lucky Erin was and wishing how someone would want to adopt one of us. There was this rude 7 year old Russian girl who used to bully everyone and for some reason, I was her target for now. Anissa pushed Mabel off her chair which made her fall to the ground. "Why did you do that?!" Upset, of course I raised my voice at Anissa which was a big mistake. Anissa gabbed a fistful of my black hair and yelled at me, "What are you gonna do about it, freak?" Mabel started crying because she was unable to help me. Felt something rush over me, I can't explain what it was but suddenly I heard something say in a British accent, in the back of my head, 'You gonna let her push you around like this? Fight her.' I shut my eyes and kept saying, "No, no, no." Anissa looked at me as if I was crazy but she was also amused to watch me shrink in fear. "Are you scared, dragon girl?" Anissa was laughing at me. I heard the voice say again, 'Don't just look like an idiot! Do something. Do something now!" It was so demanding that I suddenly punched Anissa hard in the stomach and caused her to fall to the ground. "Kitade!" Mabel screamed in shock, and rushed over to me. "You hit her. Oh my gosh, you actually hit Anissa!" Mabel was happy that I did something no soul in their right mind would do in this place. I fought back. Anissa was holding her stomach and groaning in pain. A lot of kids were cheering besides Anissa's friends of course. One of them called the nuns and they came to take me to the head office. That's where madame Phiefey wanted to punish me but luckily I was spotted by the Wong couple who wanted to adopt me. It was a bit of a process but eventually I got to go home with them. Unfortunately, that didn't take away the voice inside my head.
End of FlashbackI was getting dressed. I just decided to wear a simple grey tank top, dark denim skinny jeans and my red converse shoes. I wore a deep purple hoodie to complete my casual look. My long black hair hung loose over my shoulders. I put on some eyeliner and mascara to bring out my eyes more. I suddenly started thinking about Mabel and it made me sad. The day I stood up to Anissa was the last time I ever saw her. I don't know if she ended up being adopted by a lovely family and how long she stayed at the orphanage. Wherever she is, I hope she's okay. 'Ah, yes. The friend you abandoned.' he's starting again with me! 'I didn't abandon her. I got adopted and I couldn't take her with me.' I sighed. 'Haha, so glad you're not my friend. But worry not, I won't abandon you little princess.' I hope the doctor can solve this problem. I know it seems unlikely to work but I can hope. 'Please abandon me, I beg you' I brushed out my hair and rushed down stairs. "Morning, mama" my adoptive mother smiled at me, "Good morning, Tamika. Did you sleep well? Are you feeling okay?" She hugged me. "Yes, mama. I slept well and I am feeling okay" I smiled back. 'Liar, you are not.' Mama Tila noticed my face changed when I heard the voice in my head. She thought that it was depression causing me to hear things. She pulled me close to her chest and held me. "Don't worry, I'm just waiting on your father to finish up and then we can go to the doctor to get you checked out." She sometimes spoke to me as if I was 5 years old but I didn't really mind it much. She just loves me. My adoptive father came down stairs. "Tamika, Tila, I'm sorry to keep you two waiting. I had to sort out a couple of documents." He was always obsessed with his job but at least he made time for his wife. "Finally, Li-Shou! You're addicted to those documents, I swear." Tila giggled at her husband. "Not as addicted to how I am to you." He winked at Tila. "Okay, wow, not in front of me!" I fake shrieked before we headed to his white mustang.
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