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A New Field

And that isn’t it, that’s just primary school I’ve been in some crazy situations with girls, I know all men have, but the difference with me is, to be honest, I mostly start them. Hey I didn’t know better, I always had to learn the hard way, luckily I had Kieran through secondary school. Zara got accepted to an all girl school in West London and Trey got accepted to some other school, more about that later. One minute “I’m coming Kieran man just let me get my suit ready!” That guy is always rushing me, just like in secondary school.

When I started secondary school I was studying a lot so I didn’t really focus on girls even though there were some nice girls in my school, but most of them started to get boyfriends half way through year 7 and everybody was trying to get close to each other, but not me, I was cool all through the summer; I just hung around with Rodney and sometimes with Kieran. We did nearly everything that summer together, and not once was I with any girls, so going to this new school with all these new people, I was kind of scared because secondary isn’t like primary this is a whole new field, these girls have got that Jade mentality and I didn’t want to step in that realm again. So I stayed focus on my work, but Kieran had other ideas “Sprat that one star, she’s nice” Kieran said as he pointed at an okay looking girl. You see its ‘98’ so light skin is in fashion, so any light skin girl guys see they automatically think they’re buff, but I don’t think like that. Nah not with me I look for that prime rib not saying light skin girls aren’t nice, I mean my wife to be is light skin, I’m just saying not all of them are, but that’s just my opinion. “Nah star she’s not my type” I replied “What’s your type then? I showed you bare girls and you won’t sprat none of them” Kieran moaned. “My type is special you know, she’s got to have that thing that makes me want to say wa gwarn buffers!” I said jokily. “So are you telling me she weren’t a buffers?” Kieran said as he pointed at the same girl again. “First thing stop pointing it’s rude” I said as I put Kieran’s hand down “And second thing you only think she’s nice because she’s light skinned” I continued to say “Nah she’s....she’s....Yeah your right she isn’t that buff” Kieran said before we both started to laugh. “So what’s your type then? Who’s got that buffness?” Kieran asked “I don’t know but when I see her...” I replied and stopped because just as I was speaking I saw my type walking by. Her name was Danielle the hottest girl in year 7, she was so cute, she was brown skin, body weren’t too developed but hey its year 7; year 8 and 9 was the charm though. The girls started to develop and their bodies were like bang! Danielle always had her hair in two pig tails and carried a pink lip gloss that could always be seen in her blazer front pocket and her friends weren’t bad either. First you had her friend Rochelle who was the quiet one out of the three she was mixed raced black and white, had curly black hair, a cute beauty spot near her upper lip, and was very sweet and then you had Ella her and Danielle were really close friends like how me and Kieran are she’s light skinned, had short brown frizzy hair with blonde tips, short and petite with and a really pretty face but a fierce attitude at times. “There she goes J, you’ve got to sprat that” “I’ve barely spoken to her though” I replied as I contemplated weather I should speak to Danielle or not “So?” “So what if she doesn’t remember me?” “Then you can just hide away from her and never speak to her again” Kieran said sarcastically “You idiot” I replied “Stop being scared J man, just go over there and speak to her quickly and I’ll come and support you if you need me” Kieran said as he tried to encourage me “You got my back yeah?” “Course” “Alright I’m going in” I said to Kieran before I started to walk over to Danielle and her friends “Hey Danielle” “Yeah J” Danielle replied so sweetly ‘Wow she actually remembers me’ I thought to myself but then I froze for a second because I didn’t really have nothing to say so I just thought of something quickly “How can you just walk past me without giving me a hug?” Danielle then stepped forward and put her arms around me and said “Sorry Jay, I didn’t see you there” softly into my ears which made me so weak but I had to keep my composure. “It’s Ok” I said with a smile as I hugged her back “Aww that’s so sweet” Ella said sarcastically as she leaned against the wall “Why you hating for?” I asked “I’m not hating I just think it’s sweet how you came over here just for a hug from Danielle” Ella replied and as she said that Danielle looked at me to see my response. At first I felt under pressure then I replied “I never just came over her for a hug I also wanted to know where you girls were going? Because me and my boy Kieran were wondering if we could join you” “Ah that’s sweet we were just going to jam in the library, it’s too cold out here” Danielle replied while rubbing her arms. “Ok so do you mind if Kieran and I come with you?” “Nah it’s ok. Come on then” Danielle said as she waved to Kieran to come join us. “Why don’t you guys just stay in the cold” Ella said as we walked to the library entrance. “What don’t you want us near you?” Kieran said as he put his arm around Ella and hugged her “Get off me” Ella screamed “Stop screaming Ell’s you know you think Kieran’s buff” Danielle turned and said to Ella “Ah you got exposed!” I shouted before I put my hand over my mouth “Shut up Jemmel” Ella said as she began to blush. “Why are we going to the library anyway? Can’t we jam inside the classroom when it’s cold outside” I asked the girls as we stood outside the library entrance “Nah we tried to chill in our Form Rooms but Mrs Rosenior told us we can’t stay in the building when and we had to leave” Danielle said before she kissed her teeth “She’s such a idiot man” Ella added “Alright calm down, calm down” Kieran said jokily to Ella to which she just gave him a bad look “Do you guys have library cards?” Danielle asked “Um mm” Kieran and I hummed as we looked at each other and shrugged our shoulders “Come on Dee do you think these two would have library cards?” Ella said as she mocked us “Why are you so facety?” I said to Ella “Hey J don’t watch that star. I like that she’s feisty” Kieran said to me with a smile as he put his arm around Ella’s shoulder which she removed instantly. “Don’t worry about their cards Ell’s. Michael will let us in. He likes me so he’ll let us slide through without cards” Danielle said confidently as we walked into the library. When we went into the library Danielle nodded and smiled a cute cheeky little smile at Michael who was sitting at a desk by the entrance and we all went straight to the back of the library to chill because there was a nice little area in between the Victorian Era and French Revolution section were we could all sit on the big pillows and talk as much as we wanted. No one ever came to that section because no one especially in my school was interested in History probably because my school was mostly full of black people and we all know what our history was like, it’s just about boats and beatings. So we hung out in the History section because it was like our own section and from then on that became the normal hang out for us. We would stay in the library all through break time bussing bare jokes, listening to music on Ella’s tape player and messing around with each other till lesson time, me and Danielle became really close and then we finally got together. So did Ella and Kieran but Danielle and I had a different sort of relationship because I was a different person and still changing, and I don’t mean puberty. I mean my outlook on life and people was different from an average twelve year old, Danielle and I were happy but I started to go through some shit that really threw me off, to help you understand more let me take you to after school.

While I was going out with Danielle, Kieran and I used to go over to Rodney’s house after school to just hang out; we couldn’t go to mine because my Mum’s likes her privacy and Kieran was a bit vague about why we couldn’t go to he’s house, so we hung out at Rodney’s plus Aunty Farah was mad chilled about having people coming over to her house probably because Rodney always had people over so I guess she just got used to people always coming around. One day when we went there, we were just chilling listening to 2pac, Rodney always had the latest 2pac tapes; Kieran and I were playing the Playstation then Rodney pulled out a spliff while he sat by his bedroom window “You man want some?” Rodney said to me and Kieran. “What’s that Rods?” I asked as I quickly turned my head to see what he was holding. I weren’t really paying much attention to what he was holding because I was playing the game. Rodney then opened his window while he sat on the window ledge, lit the spliff up and started smoking it. Kieran being so eager dropped the control pad during our game and asked Rodney if he could try some. Rodney gave the spliff to Kieran and Kieran began to inhale “J it’s nice, cuz...” Kieran said with squinted eyes and smile like a Jester on a joker card. I wasn’t quite sure if I wanted to try some but I wanted to be like my cousin and friend I took the spliff from Kieran and hesitantly took a big pull on the spliff which made me cough a lot. It was like I had a fire in my throat and my chest was begging my mouth for some air ‘I’m going to die’ I thought to myself as I gasped for some air “You alright J?” Kieran asked with concern as he patted my back “Ye...Yeah...Yeah” I said as I finally caught my breath “Why didn’t you help me? You prick!” I shouted angrily at Rodney “Because you’re over exaggerating man and you’re not supposed to pull so hard AND you’re fucking the weed up. Come give me the spliff let me show you how to do this boy” Rodney said as he took the spliff from me “You’re so cold man” I sulked as I sat on Rodney’s bed still breathing heavily as my throat started to not burn as much as it did before. “Stop moaning and come watch and learn” Rodney ordered which made me stand up, cross my arms and listen to what he was going to say “First you got to pull on it, then take another breath in to inhale, but you have to be nice with it” Rodney said calmly as he demonstrated how to smoke. He then gave the spliff back to me and told me to try again “I’m cool man” I said as I shook my head and tried to give Rodney the spliff “Stop being a girl cuz and try again” Rodney argued “Nah man cause if I choke again you won’t help me” I complained “Ok, ok. I’m sorry I never helped you when you were choking Jamelia. Now try again” Rodney unsympathetically said as he mocked me “Don’t call Jamelia! Rochelle!!” I angrily said as I got wound up “Alright cuz stop crying if you’re not going to smoke it just pass it back then” Rodney said as he became tired of arguing he then put his hand out for the spliff “No. I’m going to try again” I said “Finally” Kieran huffed as he threw his arms up in the air “Shut up!” Rodney and I both said to Kieran at the same time which made us both smile. I then put my hand out for the lighter which Rodney cheekily threw at me and repeated his instructions “So you pull on the spliff then, breathe in again right?” “Yup” I then lit the spliff before putting into my mouth. “So you pull on...” “Yeah man! Just do it, don’t think about it too much” Rodney said as he tried to hurry me up, as Rodney and Kieran looked on at me I did what Rodney said to do and I was fucked up. All I could see was Rodney and Kieran smiling at me while nodding their heads up and down, the room was wobbling from left to right and my head felt so light but I also felt so relaxed, so free and so happy. So from then on after school that was what we was doing getting high at Rodney’s house, but after a while it really messed me up with Danielle, one minute were cool, next minute were arguing over some dumb things. But when we had our good moments we had some good moments, I had my first real kiss with her I don’t mean primary kiss, I mean kiss, kiss, you know! We stayed in touch throughout the summer, but when we weren’t in touch I was out and about with Kieran spratting girls left, right and centre. This one girl I met called Sabrina who was a nice brown skin girl with a banging body and always had her hair gelled back into a ponytail and when I say gelled back I mean Gelled Back! Her hair had so much gel in it that not even one strand of hair got loose and if it did then she would apply more gel and she was a hood chick. I kind of had a thing for hood chicks back in the day mainly because of the music I listened to; I always heard 2pac say he needed a ‘Ride or Die chick’ and because I was heavily influenced I thought I needed one too. Plus she went to the school down the road from my school so I thought, yeah that’s convenient but also trouble. But I didn’t care there were no strong feelings between me and Danielle I mean I liked her a lot but I was young and just wanted to have some fun. One day Kieran and I were walking home from Rodney’s house and we had a conversation that at the time we didn’t know that in a little way it would change our lives forever. “I don’t know how you do it J. I mean two girls? My one chick is giving me problems” Kieran said as he held his head as if he had a headache. “That’s just me though K, I got it like that” I laughed and replied “You’re a dog, you know that?” Kieran said as he gave me a slight push on my arm “Woof! Woof!” I barked loudly. “But seriously though J, that’s what I’m going to do, Ella’s trying to put a chain on me, and I’m a man, I need to pop my collar!” Kieran said as he unbuttoned his shirt collar. “Finally! Because you know Sabrina may have a friend for you, you know I couldn’t leave my boy hanging” I said with a smile. “See that’s why I love you man, you’re my brother” Kieran said as he nudged me and gave me a hug “I’ll see you at school tomorrow” he then said as he crossed the street. As he did that I thought about what Rodney said about showing no emotions, to anyone not even your closet friends, and I hardened up for a second but then I thought fuck that, Rodney words didn’t seem to matter to me, Kieran was more than a friend he was like my brother so that rule doesn’t apply to him he’s my family. “Ok K, I’ll see you tomorrow” I said to Kieran as he turned the corner to walk home, I then began to walk home just smiling to myself.

Looking back now those days were crazy but like I said before yr 8 was the charm but yr 9 was the CHARM! Danielle body blossomed, and so did the other girls around me, we still had a few ugly ducklings but their bodies were ripe. Hey I was like 14 at the time; you think it’s about the personality? NOPE! It was about trying to have sex, yeah you heard me at 14 years old I was thinking about sex. When did you think its starts when were 16-17 HA! Not in my school, that’s why I loved my school.

I remember this one party that other school had as an end of yr 9 celebration that Sabrina my girl from the other school invited me and Kieran to. It was a house party in a tower block around Sabrina’s friend Natalie’s area and the party was so live it had everything, music, drinks, weed, no parents because Natalie’s mum was basically a bad parent and always left her in the house alone. But anyway the party was really good Natalie’s flat wasn’t really big but she moved the TV, dining table and a few other bits to the other side of the living room near her mum’s Panasonic speaker system so we had space to dance and so more people could fit in the living room and she changed the light in the living room to a red bulb so the whole room was red; now tell me if that isn’t the mood setter; tonight was going to be so much fun and I think Sabrina was ready to have sex with me so I really excited but I was also nervous because the problem with these sorts of parties and having two girlfriends is the other one might show up. “Tonight is going to be hectic!” Kieran said excitedly as we walked into the estate “I know Kier. I’m excited” I said to Kieran with a big smile as I rubbed my hands together “I’m going to get a few numbers tonight I can feel it” Kieran said as he pulled out his brand new Nokia 3210 “Put your phone away blud. You know we’re near Myatts Field, you can’t go around stunting like that” I said nervously as I looked around to see if there was anyone around “Look who’s talking” Kieran replied as we stopped for second outside Natalie’s tower block “What you mean?” as I looked at myself to see if I saw what Kieran was talking about “Your wearing your new huarache’s” Kieran said as he pointed at my new trainers “So?” I replied as I shrugged my shoulders “So you don’t think that’s stunting?” “They’re all black. No one going to notice them” I then said as I open the door to the block to see three boys sitting on the staircase all wearing black hooded Nike Jackets and track suit bottoms and all I thought to myself as Kieran and I walked over to the lift was ‘Please don’t let these guys notice my trainers’. I then press the button for the lift hoping that it wouldn’t take long to come and as Kieran and I waited for the lift in silent, I started to hear the guys murmuring to each other about trainers “Shit” I said quietly to myself which made Kieran turn and look worryingly at me “Hey fam!” one of the guys said to me loudly at me that his voice echoed through the small corridor I then turned around to look at the guy as he said “Are those the new all black huarache’s?” “Yeah” I replied calmly in a monotone voice because I was scared that these guys were going to rob me so I had to act calm and not show any fear “They’re sick still” the guy said as he nodded his head in approval of my trainers “Safe” I replied as I nodded my head back. Just then the lift doors opened and Kieran and I step in, pressed the button to go the twelfth floor and as the doors closed Kieran and I just looked at each with a look that said ‘Phew’.

When we got to the twelfth floor we could just tell where the party was because there were a group of girls and guys standing on the balcony outside of the house and you could hear the base of the music trembling through the floor as we got closer to the party “Jemmel look at that girl there” Kieran whispered to me as he nodded at this girl with dark beautiful skin, mid length jet black hair and stunning eyes. As Kieran and I looked at her as we walked up to the front she noticed that Kieran and I was watching her and she shyly smiled at both of us and put her head down as she rubbed the back of her neck which made Kieran and I smile back at her. “I need her number. She’s tick” Kieran said as we stepped into the house and stood outside the kitchen door “I know Kier. You have to chirps her” I replied as I nudge Kieran “I’m going to talk to her now” Kieran said before he nudged me again and went outside to go talk to the girl. I then started to look around from where I was standing and from what I could see Kieran was right this party was going to be hectic. The ratio from girls to boys was just right; the music was heavy, everyone seemed to be cool and the guys weren’t on this bad boy vibe it was just a nice un-chaperoned house party. Just then one of my favourite songs by Ma$e came on ‘Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad Boy you me feel so good’ everyone started to sing and dance which got me in the mood to go find a Sabrina so I could maybe get a little dance. So I started to walk towards the living where the music was playing hoping that Sabrina was in there and she was with her friends. Sabrina and her friends were in the corner of the room sitting down on the couch conversing and dancing. Sabrina was sitting on the armrest of the couch that had been pushed to the side to make some space for everyone to dance; she looked really pretty as she waved her hands in the air and sang along to the song. Her hair was gelled back as usual but on the side of her hair she had her hair in finger waves, she also had big silver hoop earrings on, a long cream woollen cardigan on with a black vest top underneath, light blue jean shorts on with black tights and all white plimsoll shoes she was looking buff. I then made my way through everyone to approach her “You alright” I said with a smile “JJ!” Sabrina said excitedly as she jumped up from where she was sitting and gave me a big hug “Everyone this is Jemmel the guy I’ve been talking about” Sabrina said as she introduced me to her friends “She’s been talking about you every day at school this week” one of her friends said to me “Is it?” I turned and said to Sabrina with a cocky smile “Shut up” Sabrina said to me as she started to get shy “I’ll be back in a moment you guys I’m going to be with Jemmel” Sabrina then said to her friends before me and her came out of the living room and into the bathroom. After spending a little time with Sabrina kissing her and holding her in the bathroom, she went to hang with her friends for a little while whilst I spoke to Kieran “Tonight has been hectic so far. I was in the bathroom with Sabrina and she was kissing all over my neck and shit and telling me that she wants to have sex tonight” I said excitedly has I stood by the staircase while Kieran sat at the bottom of the staircase with a plate of chicken wings “Are you going to press her?” Kieran asked before he took a bite of his food “Of course I am standard” I said as I gave Kieran a hand clap “Err man your hands are all greasy” I said with a look of distaste as I wipe the grease from my hands on the banister “J you see me eating these chicken wings so what do you expect?” Kieran said with his mouthful “A napkin” I said which made Kieran shake his head and carry on eating “You alright Andrew” the dark skinned girl that Kieran and I saw before we came into the house said and waved at Kieran as she walked by us “Yeah I’m cool Jasmine” Kieran replied back with a little smile which made me giggle a little “You told her your name was Andrew?” I said and laughed “Yeah blud! I’m not trying to get caught by Ell’s if that girl calls me and ask for Andrew I’m going to tell her she’s got the wrong number” Kieran said confidently as if he had it all figured out “You’re so dumb you didn’t have to change your name all you had to do was take her number and when you call her just call her on private number so she won’t ring you” I said before I shook my head “Listen her Puff Daddy I don’t have no money to be buying credits to be calling no girl” “But yet you’ve got a brand new 3210” “Yeah so people can call me” Kieran said emphatically which made me and him laugh “You’re a fool you know” I said as I shook my head at Kieran “Just like you bro” Kieran said before he finished his last chicken wing “I need a drink star” Kieran said as he got up “You want something J?” Kieran asked as he stood in the kitchen door way “Nah I’m good” I replied. Just then Sabrina came up behind me and said “This is my tune! Let’s dance J” she then took me by the hand and led me into the living room where they were playing Donell Jones You know what’s up “Are you having a good time JJ?” Sabrina said in my ear as we danced “Yeah I’m with you in it, so its perfect” “Aw you’re so sweet” Sabrina said as she put her arms around my shoulders. “Your sweeter” I said as I gave her a kiss on her cheek, then I felt somebody give me a little push in my head, as I turned around I couldn’t believe who it was “You alright, Zee” I said happily as I hugged Zara “How you been? I haven’t seen or heard from you in a long time” Zara said with a beautiful smile. You see Zara has always been pretty, but that night I saw her it was like I was seeing her all over again, her light caramel skin was glowing; her hair was long and straight but with small ringlets at the ends. Her pink lips looked so soft that I just wanted to kiss her, and she wasn’t wearing her red rimmed glasses so I could proper look into her eyes which I always did because her eyes are beautiful but then again even with her glasses on I’ve always loved Zara’s eyes ever since we were young. That night was different because that night I never saw her as my little friend Zara that night I saw her as a women, a beautiful young women. As I looked at her for a few seconds, Sabrina then came from behind me and gave Zara a hug and said “You alright Zara?” “Yeah I’m alright Bri” “This is so weird, how do you guys know each?” “We go way back” Zara and I said at the same time, that was a cute moment “Ok well I’m going to speak to Nat, you guys should go and talk somewhere because it seems like you got a lot of catching up to do; but just don’t try take my man Zara” Sabrina said jokily with a little smile. But Zara never answered she just smiled at Sabrina then turned and smiled at me. “Do you want to talk outside? It’s a bit noisy in here” I asked Zara “Yeah I would like that” Zara replied with a smile. We then walked through everyone in the living room to out onto Natalie’s back balcony and just like that we started to talk about everything we missed out on each other’s lives; it had been nearly 2 years since I last saw Zara but it still felt like we just saw each other the day. We were out there for at least 2 hours just laughing and talking “So how do you know Sabrina?” I asked “I don’t really know her know her but she’s a friend of one of my friends, how did you guys meet?” “I just saw her outside her school talking to her friends so I thought I might as well talk to her, so I did next thing you know one thing led to another and now we’re...” I said and stopped “You’re what?” Zara said as she waited for me to say that Sabrina was my girlfriend “We are who we are” I laughed and said “I knew it!” Zara said as she nudged me in my arm “What?” “I knew she wasn’t your girlfriend I could just tell” “How? How could you tell?” “Because I heard you’re still a dog and I heard you say to her ‘Your sweeter’ in that little voice that you do” Zara said with a slight smile as she shook her head slightly from left to right “What little voice? And who told you that I was a dog?” I said shockingly. “First thing you always do that little voice thing when you don’t really like a girl, you’ve been doing it ever since primary school and second thing I know some of the girls you AND Kieran have been chirp-sing. You’ve got quite a little reputation you know” Zara replied with a smile which made me laugh a little “I’ve got a reputation?” I asked but Zara never replied she just nodded her head slowly “Wow” I said under my breath ‘I haven’t been that bad have I?’ I thought to myself “Anyway forget all of that probably just rumours and I don’t do a little voice thing” “Yes you do” Zara laughed and replied “I don’t, and if you know some of the girls me and Kieran talk to then I need to be more careful on who I talk too” I laughed and said. “You think?” “But listen Zara…that’s just how I …” “No, no, no” Zara interrupted “…don’t say that’s how you are, because I don’t believe you really think that” “How do you know that?” “Because we’ve been friends since we were little JJ and even though we haven’t seen each other for a while, when I look at you I still see a really special person who just wants to be loved, as much as he loves, plus I know you babes so don’t act with me” Zara continued to say as she looked deep into my eyes. When she did that I started to feel that same feeling that I felt the day that we kissed in the playground so I quickly turned away, and as I did I started to look down to the ground floor and I saw two kids a boy and girl playing “Do you remember when we were that young?” I said with a smile as I looked down. “Yeah of course I do, and we used to ride our bikes together” Zara replied as she looked down at the children “Shhh I don’t want people to hear you” I said “What? I used to love when we rode our bikes together after school” Zara said with a smile “Me too” I said as I smiled back “I even remember when we chased the ice cream man on our bikes because he gave me the wrong ice pole, I couldn’t keep up with you, you were gone”. “Nah man I had to catch him you wanted a strawberry flavoured ice pole and he gave you raspberry and I know you’re allergic to raspberry so I had to catch him” I replied and laughed a little as I turned to look at Zara, but she wasn’t laughing she was just standing there looking at me in amazement. “What?” I asked, Zara then snapped back to reality, smiled and said “I can’t believe you remember that. You remembered that I’m allergic to Raspberry”. “I remember a lot of things about you Zee. We had a lot of fun together” I replied as I looked over the balcony again and Zara did the same, we then became quiet for a minute “Do you remember when we kissed? When we were young” I said as I turned and looked into Zara’s eyes “Yeah...I never forgot it” Zara replied softly with a smile “I know it’s crazy but I…..” I began to say before I was pulled by my arm into the living room by Sabrina “You were out there for too long, I need you now baby” Sabrina said in a babyish voice, as she put her arms around my shoulders and head on my chest and started to slow dance with me to Lauryn Hill’s song Ex-Factor. That tune was big at the time, and it still is, anyway, as I slow danced with Sabrina I was still looking at Zara as she stood on the balcony staring out into the night sky. “Let’s go into Natalie’s bedroom” Sabrina whispered in my ear, I nodded yes but I was still thinking about Zara, but I couldn’t see her on the balcony because Sabrina’s big head was blocking my view, we then began to walk out of the living room where everybody was dancing and began to walk upstairs. As I held her hand as we walked half way up the stairs, Danielle walks in and see’s me with Sabrina and goes mad! “Oh my gosh! What you doing with my man?” Danielle shouted at Sabrina “He’s not your man, he’s MY man, and who do you think you’re shouting at? You don’t know me” Sabrina replied angrily as she walked down the stairs towards Danielle “I would bang you up, you know?” Danielle said angrily as she pointed in Sabrina’s face and when I saw that I started to slowly walk up the stairs towards one of the rooms “Alright then bad girl, lets sort this out then outside, if your bad” Sabrina shouted while pointing outside getting her gangster lean on, and that’s all I can tell you what happened from there, because something better happened. All of a sudden I was pulled into one of the rooms which was Natalie’s mum bedroom I could tell because I’ve seen Natalie’s room before her room is so messy; but this was a adults room “Shhh” Zara said as she put her index finger on my lips “I missed you” Zara whispered before she bit her bottom lip; I then slowly moved closer to Zara and we then began to kiss each other. “I missed you too” I said as I caught my breath we then started touch each other and kiss passionately, we then undressed each other and I laid on top of Zara as she rested on the bed I then softly kissed Zara on her neck as I touched her body which made Zara pant heavily, I then stopped kissing her neck looked straight into Zara’s eyes and said “Are you sure you want to do this?” Zara looked straight up into my eyes and said “Of course I do I’ve never felt for anyone but you, so why not?” which made me smile “But what if someone comes in?” “Just lock the door” Zara replied so I quickly got up and tried to lock the door but there wasn’t a lock on the door so I got a chair and push it up against the handle so no one could get in. “I’m so happy that I’m here with you” I said to Zara as I laid on her “Me too” she replied before we started to kiss each other again and make love.

Zara was the first girl I ever had sex with and just like our kiss, it felt so right, after that night I obviously dumped Sabrina and Danielle, and spent that summer with my friends and family Rodney, Kieran and Zara, yeah I said it, Zara and I stayed friends she thought it would be better that way. I didn’t really agree with her because I wanted to be with her but I respected her wish and we stayed friends nothing more, even though there was something more. But Zara never really wanted to get into it. That summer of ‘99’ was crazy, we had so much fun and Trey came back into town, he explained to us that he got accepted to some school in Kent. Trey and his mum moved to Kent because she thought it would give him a chance to get a better education and even though it was better for Trey educationally he was still the same old cocky Trey. So we all hung out with each other that summer we went snuck into Chessington World of Adventures and Thorpe Park. I nearly got a tattoo done but at the last moment the women wanted to see some ID so I never got the tat I wanted but that summer was fun. “Why are you taking so long?” “Kieran we have a whole 2 and a half hours be easy!” “Whatever man” “And stop slamming the door” you see he’s always rushing, that’s why when him and Ella finally got it on, it weren’t very long if you know what I mean.

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