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Extended Family & Harder Times

See we were about 16 now, making mad dough, sorry about this, my phone is ringing, look who it is; Mr Smith himself. Let me put him on loud speaker, “What’s good Trey?” “Nothing much J, I'm just getting ready for your big day. Are you nervous?” “I was, but I’m cooling myself out”. “Nahhh nigger, you’re nervous, just like that day”. “I was just thinking about that time, and I’m not nervous, you’re making me now though”. “Be easy guy; just relax its going to be a good day. But make sure your on time”. “Course I would be”, “Ok cuz, One”. “One”.

Where was I now? Oh yeah, so it’s about 2002 and me and Kieran were about 16, making mad dough and we were schooled up in everything, Rodney taught me and Kieran how to drive so we wasn’t out on the street too much, so after Kieran paid all his house bills he brought a car, a nice little Volkswagen Polo he only had his provisional license but that didn’t stop Kieran from driving around and lucky for him he never got stopped by the police. As for me I’m the cocky one as you all know, I brought myself a TT 125cc Moped, and damn I loved that bike. “What’s good Beezy*?” I said as I stepped off my bike. “Same old fam, just out here waiting for you man to try to make some pee’s” Beezy replied as he stopped leaning against the wall. Beezy was Kieran and mine friend. He’s the big guy around his area that knows everyone and he’s always in tuned with what’s happening. Kieran and I met Beezy on night while we were selling some goods to a couple of guys around his area but we didn’t know that these guys were snakes and they wanted to rob Kieran and I. Everything was going to plan for them they had the goods, Kieran and I were not armed and we were in their territory which was a stupid move on my part because Rodney always told me to meet people on mutual grounds and to never go to their estate or area because we’ll be playing on their grounds “Safe you man for the food” one of the guys said he picked up the rucksack full of drugs as he walked backwards out of the dimly lit park that we had met up at while the other guy with him who was wearing a black scarf that covered his mouth and a black hoody that covered the rest of his head except his eyes walked backwards slowly while holding onto something which was in his tracksuit bottoms which Kieran and I thought was a gun. All of a sudden Beezy came up from behind the two guys with five other big guys and which made Kieran and I think we’re definitely dead now because at first glance Beezy looks like a killer because he’s big and stocky, has a grisly beard and looks like he doesn’t ever smile so we thought it was game over for us “Stop acting like some badman Simon and give them man back their food” Beezy said with authority “And take you hand out of your pants Daniel you know you don’t roll like that” he then said to the other guy with the scarf on to which they both listen and done what Beezy told them to do “Come out of here man” Beezy said and nodded to the guys before he kissed his teeth and slowly walked up to Kieran and I. “You man can’t be moving like that around here you know” Beezy said to me and Kieran “What sides you man from?” he then asked “K-town” “Bridge” Kieran and I replied “Ok, ok Kennington and London Bridge” Beezy said as he nodded his head “Who you get your food from?” he then asked “From Moods” I answered calmly “What Moods, Moods?” Beezy said in shock “Ok so you man aren’t on this little boy ting you actually got the good food from the big man. You man need to put me on to Moods” Beezy said “After you help us it’s the least we could do” I said as I put my fist out to nudge Beezy to which he nudge me back and said “We’ll link up soon. You man be easy” before he bopped off with his goons following behind him like foot soldiers. From that day onwards Kieran and I always did business with Beezy plus was actually a really cool guy and someone who we could trust as a friend “Have you seen Kieran today?” I said as I leaned backwards on my bike. “Yeah Marley was here a minute ago. Isn’t that him coming now?” Beezy said as he pointed to Kieran’s car as Kieran drove towards us, oh yeah I forgot to say they called Kieran ‘Marley’ because he grew his hair and always had his hair in single plats. His hair was long like dreads and he was one of the first ones to grow facial hair. So he grew his beard quite long even though Ella didn’t like it so because he had the long plats, his complexion was fair and he had a beard kind of similar to Bob Marley’s, everyone started to call him Marley. “What’s good Beezy? You alright bruv?” Kieran said as he lowered his window. “Why am I here before you?” I said to Kieran. “Cuz I was here from early, but you took long so I had to pick up Ella and drop her to Danielle’s house; oh yeah she said hi by the way” Kieran replied. “Who? Ella or Danielle?” I wondered. “Both of them, anyway come we do this ting and move out I can’t even park here” Kieran said as he looked around for traffic wardens. “Ok pass me the food, me and B would deal with it” I said as I reached into the car for Kieran to pass me the weed. “Be quick though, we got our exams in about 30 minutes”. Yeah that’s right our exams you see even though we sold drugs we still kept our grades up, I know it sounds impossible with the late night supplying and studying at the same time, but we made it work or at least we tried to make it work. After we finished supplying, we rushed to take our exams and then we had a class later on that day. Now because it was coming to the end of year 11 and it was basically summer no one really paid much attention in class unless it was important for our exams, so Kieran and I always came to class late, all dress up in our fresh Gap jackets and Prada shoes, slash trainers you know the ones. “Nice of you gentlemen to join us” Mr Presley said to us as we came into the room. “Jay Jay! Come sit over here babes” Tanya my girl at the time said as she waved at me, I then tilted my head and looked at Kieran “Go on then, I’m going to sit near the back anyway, I need some sleep” Kieran said as he gave me a nudge and went to the back of the class room. “You alright Tanya?” I said with a smile as I sat next to her. “No, not really. I need some new shoes baby” she said as she made a sulky face. See I didn’t want to buy her no shoes but since Zara was gone I wanted to make a fresh start with women. I abandon most of the rules that Rodney taught me and just try to actually be with someone and I thought by giving her what she wanted that was like me giving her a bit of me. But I still played it tuff because I still wouldn’t allow myself to show any emotions that was one rule I felt that I needed to keep and stick by for now. “Why do you need shoes though? What’s wrong with the ones you have on?” I said. “These? These are school shoes. I am not walking around on the street with these shoes” Tanya replied. “You shouldn’t even be walking on street though. You should be at home behaving yourself” I said with a cocky attitude to which Tanya seductively said “I always behave myself” before she started to whinge again “But I really need some new shoes please baby, I’ll pay you back” “How?” I said as I smiled and slightly licked my lips. “I’ll show you” Tanya whispered into my ears, she then looked into my eyes, she bit her lip sexually and gave me a full on kiss. As she did that, all I was thinking of was Zara because she used to bite her lip before we kissed, but it was more of a shy thing. “Gwarn Jemmel!” and wolf whistles was all I could hear, as I moved my hands up Tanya’s shirt, then Mr Presley came over and stopped my fun. “What do you think you are doing?! This is not the place or time for that Jemmel” Mr Presley shouted I then kissed my teeth and said “What man? Just because you can’t get know girl you want to try and block me”. As soon as I said that Mr Presley’s face went red in embarrassment, it was like I touched a nerve. “Get out my classroom!” he then shouted at me. “What? Who you talking to? You mad?” I shouted back and with that Kieran woke up and saw what was happening and jumped on top of the tables towards us. “Don’t talk to my brother like that, we’ll see you, you know” Kieran said to Mr Presley. “Yeah with your pretty blue Skoda car outside near the corner shop across from the school, we see you no know” I said in a so sure voice. “That’s not my car” Mr Presley replied. “Why are you lying? We see you coming out of that car everyday” Kieran said. “Yeah so we know it’s your car, you’re new car” I continued. “Ooooooh!” everyone in the class said which made Mr Presley uneasy. Which was what we wanted to do, I mean we weren’t going to do nothing to his car it was just a bunch of empty semi treats. But he didn’t know that, all he wanted was us to get out of his class and leave his car in one piece so he calmly said “Could you two please leave the classroom please” as we got our things and left we were just giving out high fives and nudges to our friends in class as we left. Mr Presley then came outside the class with us and said “Please don’t do nothing to Betty I just brought her 6 months ago”. “Do you really think we were going to touch your car?” I replied as I tried to hold back from laughing. “Well you described my car and you know where I park it” Mr Presley replied anxiously “So?” Kieran said and laughed “Get back in your class man” I said before we both started laughing and with that Mr Presley went back into the classroom and slammed the door which made me and Kieran laugh even harder. “Let’s go eat fam” I said as we left the Science department still laughing; we were some real trouble makers.

The next few days after that was normal, I was hanging around with Tanya and Kieran was with Ella. You see Kieran was always over mine so my mum knew him well, and since I started going over to he’s house his mum got to know me well. One day I went over there to see Kieran but he weren’t in and Ms Lee and I had a deep conversation that I have never had before with an older woman. “Jemmel are you happy with things in your life at the moment, I mean I know you’re only young and that’s a big question to ask someone your age, but sometimes you don’t seem truly happy” Ms Lee said as she looked at me with concern. “Yeah I’m alright” I said with a vague smile. “I don’t think so, are you missing somebody?” Ms Lee said as she squinted her eyes to see if he lying. You see Ms Lee was very spiritual she could sense how you were feeling by your aura, I personally didn’t understand how she knew certain things but all I knew was that I couldn’t lie to her. “Well there is somebody I’m missing. It’s a girl” I said, “OK” she replied. “I know this sounds crazy because I’m only six-teen but...You know when somebody’s right for you and when they’re around everything feels right, well I feel that this girl is that somebody” I said. “Is this person your girlfriend?” Ms Lee said with a little smile. “Nah she’s a friend” I replied. “Well why isn’t she your girlfriend Jemmel, if you feel so strongly about her?” Ms Lee asked I then put my head down and said “Because things always stop me from getting close to her”. “What things dear? You mean people? Cause I’ll ruff them up for you” Ms Lee said as she lifted my head up by my chin, I smiled at her and said “Nah Ms Lee, I mean walls like barriers”. “Well it sounds to me that the only person putting up these walls and barriers is you. Listen here child, you got to let people in before you push them out, you’re a very special person, you and Kieran are so much alike it’s unbelievable. So I’m going to tell you like I told him once before” Ms Lee said, this part gets deep people “Don’t let life OR love pass you by, it only comes around once or twice and if you miss it, you’ll never know what it was like” Ms Lee said to me with a smile. She made me feel so happy that I just gave her a big hug “What’s that for?” she said happily as she hugged me back. “Just because you’re just like someone I know and it’s unbelievable. Do you want to go for a walk?” I said “I would love to Jemmel. Let me get my coat on” Ms Lee said as she got up to get her jacket. “Where are we going?” Ms Lee asked “Just for a walk” I replied with a smile. That day we walked it to my house and talked along the way she told me about good stuff when you’re in love and relationships, things that I wasn’t opening my eyes to see, things that I was avoiding that I wanted to have. She also made me see that all these rules I had were stupid and weren’t always right. As we walked through the park it was kind of mad because as I talked to Ms Lee I saw all my thug boys and a few addicts that I usually sold too, but Ms. Lee didn’t pay them any attention even though she knew who they were, and I knew she knew I mean she’s spiritual not stupid. When we got to my house I introduced Ms Lee to Mum and they got along like a house on fire, it was just like seeing me and Kieran talk and laugh, my Mum and Ms Lee became really good friends after that day, her and Kieran started to come over for dinner and we went over their house too, they were like my extended family, so now I had two mums and a brother.

We finished school that June and got our results in August, mine were good I got six passes an A in ICT which was good because I wanted to do a web designing course in college. Double C in Science which was surprising because after me and Kieran disrespected Mr Presley he made it his mission not to teach us; a D in Maths, which I thought fuck it we got calculators in the real world, we even got calculators on our phones, and a C in Art and Spanish. I was ‘playing around’ with some Spanish girl; she helped me a lot, in a lot of ways! Kieran done well too, he got five passes, but he just really wanted to pass Maths and Textiles, yeah you heard me Textiles, but don’t get it messed up that guy can design some bad boy clothes, but more on that later on. That summer was hard, I barely saw Rodney, I spoke to him on the phone a couple of times, but he was always busy, the rest of us hung together that summer, it was me, Kieran, Ella and Tanya. Tanya and Ella didn’t really get along, because there from different groups in school, but girls don’t like each other anyway, I remember when Kieran passed his driving test and we drove down to Brighton to celebrate.

“When we get there, can you get me some sunglasses? Oh yeah and this hat I saw last week, oh oh and this boom red dress, that would look so good on me” Tanya said to me. “Where do you think we’re going, Harrods? We’re going to Brighton; they’re not going to have everything we have in London you know. Plus do you need Jemmel to pay for all those things for you, why can’t you buy it yourself?” Ella said as she looked out of the backseat window “I weren’t talking to you” Tanya rudely replied “Well I’m talking to you” Ella said as she looked Tanya up and down. “You girls be easy man! Why do you always have to argue? It’s getting kind of long hearing you two bitch all the time” Kieran said as he drove. “Nah babes I’m just tired of hearing her shit, ‘I want this, and I want that’, I don’t see why see can’t get it herself” Ella said to Kieran looking pissed off. “But it hasn’t got anything to do with you what J gets me. You’re not his girl” said Tanya. “You're not his main girl” Ella muttered as she looked away “What you say?” said Tanya, knowing this was about to start an issue I had to intervene. “Tanya jam man! She didn’t say anything, you’re just trying to start a problem, man would get you your dress. It’s nothing” I said before I kissed my teeth. “Hey cuz, how much longer is it?” I said to Kieran, “Hopefully not long fam” Kieran replied as he shook his head from left to right. When we got there we had a better time than in the car, and yeah I did buy Tanya what she wanted, but it was nothing, I had some change saved up so when I could I would spend a little. Tanya always paid me back though, like that night we stayed in Brighton hotel “You ready?” Tanya said seductively as she pushed me on the bed and climbed on top of me as she wore a red lingerie outfit that I brought her with red diamond stockings. “I’m always ready” I replied “I hope you are. Do you like my outfit babes?” “I brought it so I must like it” I replied. “That’s true I’m going to thank you” she said with a sexual smile. “Go on then” Tanya then looked at me sexually and then started to kiss my neck softly and undressing me and damn! She really thanked me.

Now I know she was a kind of sket but at the time I didn’t really fully realise or thought nothing of it. I just thought she’s a freak with me, a bit of a gold digger, but she couldn’t dig that deep with me. Like Rodney always told me and its going to sound raw ladies but here I go “Don’t pay for pussy” I know that sounds rude and vaguer but I’m just reciting what Rodney said to me. After Brighton Kieran and I got mad busy, we were trying to get as much money as possible, so I never saw much of Tanya, only when I wanted sex. Plus I was seeing that Spanish girl a lot, I had sex with her a few times but we both knew we weren’t serious about each other. But I did want her around so I kept her sweet just in case Tanya needed to go. Anyway because I only saw Tanya when I wanted something, and I weren’t buying her stuff no more, I guess she wasn’t feeling loved so she started to act out a bit, she started to go out more with her so called friends, when I used to call her she never answered the phones sometimes and when I got to speak to her she was acting really shady but I guess I got what I deserved because I would do the same to her when I was out with Beezy or when I was spending time with that Spanish girl. As time went on Kieran all of a sudden went missing at first I just thought needed time by his self because we were always hanging around together but after the second week of not seeing him or talking to him I started to get worried. One night as I was chilling in my bedroom watching a pirate copy of the new Spiderman film I got a call from Beezy “Hey family, I’m at some shoobs up in Mille Tow Estate around Fazer’s bit yeah, and I swear I see your girl here with some prick”. “What? Are you sure it’s Tanya?” I replied “Yeah fam, want me to pull her up for you?” Beezy said. “Nah cuzie, I’m going to be there in about 20 yeah. Call me if she leaves” I said “Alright big man. One” and just like that I got ready as quick as I could. I tried to call Kieran but all I got was his voicemail so I left a message to tell him where to meet me at. When I got to the house party I parked my bike outside of the estate and made my way up the flight of stairs to the second floor where the party was ‘I hope Beezy wrong because if he isn’t I’m going to go mad’ I thought to myself as I walked towards the party. When I got to the door it was open and Beezy was standing by the living room door like he was standing guard. I walked up to Beezy and he nudged me “There she is cuz” Beezy said as he nodded his head over to the other side of the room, and there she was with some guy all cosy in the corner. I was ready to explode but I kept my composure and I didn’t get angry, I just walked up to her with a Beezy and a few guys that were with him and said “Rah you alright Tanya? Didn’t think I was going to see you here tonight” “Umm Jemmel, you alright?” Tanya said nervously as she looked at me and the five guys standing behind me. “Hey cuz, kiss her behind her ears she loves that shit” I said to the guy with a cocky smile. “Who you talking to?” he replied angrily as he stepped towards as if he wanted to fight “I’m talking to you in it!” I replied angrily as I step forward and leant my head against his, and as I did that Beezy and the guys behind me began to form a little circle around Tanya, Me and the guy she was with. The guy then started to look around and could see that this wasn’t going to end well for him so he backed away slowly while saying “Man don’t want no beef. I barely even know this chick” “Oh you don’t know me now?” Tanya turned and asked as she felt disrespected. “Why are you talking for?” I said heatedly as I approached Tanya but she didn’t reply she just looked up at me worryingly as I looked down at her. I was so angry that I was letting my anger get the best of me; how could she do this to me? How could she try play me like an idiot? I know I wasn’t the best boyfriend but I was trying to be good and I brought her so many things to show her that I cared, nevertheless it wasn’t enough. I couldn’t do anything to her physically and never would put my hands on a woman but she hurt me and I had to make her feel my pain “You’re air anyway you think you were going to play me? When I was already fucking some other chick” I said to Tanya as I stood over her before I walked off with my boys to go and try enjoy the party. I know that was cold but I was hurt I tried to be with Tanya and I know I cheated on her. So she had every right to do the same back to me but I couldn’t let her know she hurt me I’m the big dog and wasn’t going to let no bitch get one over me sorry for my language but she is a bitch though. Tanya stayed for the rest of the party with that guy, but she kept staring at me, I didn’t pay her any attention though, I just stayed in the kitchen with my boys and just got tipsy and high with my people. I was kind of out of it, or so I thought until Kieran showed up, he had a bottle of rum in his hand and was pissed out of his head. “Hey J, what’s gooood!” Kieran shouted, I was out of it so I was like “I’m good, family, I’m good” I mumbled as I nudged him. “Hey where all the hoes at?” Kieran said in a drunken slur “Most of them went home Marley, you came too late, where were you?” Beezy said to Kieran. “I had some things to deal with, some deep things” Kieran replied as his head slumped down. “That’s cool though fam, there’s another house party up in North London, you man rollin’?” Beezy asked. But I knew something was wrong with Kieran he’s never been this drunk before and he really cares for Ella so when he asked for hoes I started to think that he doesn’t want any chicks he wants a solution to whatever problem he was going through. “Nah B we’re cool, me and K are going to go home” I said to Beezy. “What? I’m not going home, I’m going to North London to get some chicks” Kieran said as he leant back onto the wall because he was way too drunk to stand up by himself. “Don’t listen to him we’re going to go home” I said to Beezy, “Are you sure? There’s going to be bare gash there” Beezy replied. “Nah were easy B” I said with a faint smile “Ok” and with that Beezy gave me and Kieran a nudge and left with his boys to go to the other party. “Come on bruv, let’s go home” I said to Kieran as I stood up and pulled his arm a little “I don’t want to go home” Kieran replied as he pulled away, he was drunk so I thought I’ll just trick him to get him out the party by saying let’s get something to eat and then slowly walk him home.

So we left the party and were walking to Kieran’s house, Kieran wasn’t talking much he was just looking at the sky a lot and he was saying some crazy things that made more sense later on that night. “Hey bruv, I wanna go man, I wanna go up there” Kieran said as he pointed upwards and looked up at the night sky. “You’re a joker cuz, we’ve got a lot to live for” I replied “I don’t feel like that no more” Kieran said as he started to walk backwards. “Oh shit!” he said as he bumped into two girls outside a chicken shop “Oi!” the girl said. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going, but good thing I bumped into you, your mad nice” said Kieran to the girl. “Thank you” she replied as she started blushing, “I’m Kieran and this is my boy Jemmel, what’s your names?” Kieran asked as he tried to be smooth, now these girls are talking to us like everything was cool, we didn’t know their boyfriends were in the chicken shop, so when they came out of the shop and saw Kieran and I talking to their girlfriends it didn’t look right so I can understand why they were so upset, but what I didn’t understand is why they would come straight to me to argue. Maybe because I’ve got the baby face they think that they could start trouble with me, but remember I’m tipsy because all of the drinks I just drank and Kieran’s drunk. “Why are you talking to my girlfriend for?” one of the guys says in a high pitch voice, his voice was so high pitched and girly that me and Kieran instantly looked at each and started to laugh. “You think it’s funny mate?” his friend said “Be easy man” I said calmly to them as I turned back to the guys so I could continue to talk to the girls, then one of them grabbed me by throat collar, I was just about to be flipped over when out of nowhere Kieran comes in and smashes the bottle on the guy’s head and starts beating him up so I thought fuck it and started beating up the other guy. But then the police came over and broke up the fight; we didn’t know that there was a police station nearby and as quick as we started fighting was just as quick that we got arrested. To make matters worse we had about 2 bags of weed on us, but we got arrested for disturbing the peace and not intent to supply I mean it was bad getting arrested in general but it was 2 bags of weed, no big deal. When we arrived in the police station they took my phones and everything else we had on us, as they usually do, but because Tanya always tried to check my phone I put a password on phonebook, so I no they couldn’t get into it. As we sat on the bench in the police station and we sobered up, I just got pissed off at Kieran “Why did you have to hit him with the fucking bottle?” I whispered angrily to him. “I don’t know” he replied while looking down at the floor. “What’s wrong with you man? I haven’t been able to reach you in two weeks and when I do finally see you you’re drunk and your acting like a dickhead” I said. “I’m sorry J” Kieran replied as he sniffled “What’s wrong with you K?” I asked again but Kieran just put his head lower and then I saw tears fall from his face on to the floor, he then looked up at me and said “My Mum died this morning” I just froze. I couldn’t believe what Kieran just said; it was like getting a shock to the heart that left your body cold and paralyzed. This was my first time dealing with death and the feeling left me numb.

Ms Lee was badly ill the two weeks that’s why I never saw Kieran, she kept vomiting and was always feeling faint; Kieran kept telling her to go see the doctors but she wouldn’t, old school black women can be stubborn sometimes. He told me when things got worse he called the ambulance himself, but it was too late, she died that morning from bleeding on the brain. “My Dad’s gone, and now my Mum’s gone, I don’t have any family left” Kieran said as he looked down at the floor. “Yeah you have. You got me, man’s best friend” I said to Kieran as tears rolled from my eyes, “You gentlemen can leave now, you haven’t been charged but we’re going to give you a warning” the police officer said as he walked over to Kieran and I and un-cuffed us . As we walked out of the police station I was expecting to see my mum standing there with a screw face, but she wasn’t even there. Trey was, see Kieran didn’t have his phone on him but I did and because my phonebook was locked the police must of checked my other phone which only had one number in it and it was Trey’s. Trey also got the police to just give us a warning, because he was studying to be a lawyer he used spoke to the police and argue the case for us that it’s was the first time that we had ever gotten arrested and that the weed we had on use was just for recreational use and a warning would be fair. I personally don’t know why the police even listened to Trey because he wasn’t a solicitor and wasn’t old enough to represent us but I think because it was late and the police didn’t want to fill out any paper work they just agreed with him and let us go with a warning. “I bet you didn’t expect to see me here, did you?” Trey said with a smile, “Nah cuz we weren’t” I said as I nudged him and we all walked out of the station. “You guys don’t ever change” Trey said as we stood by his car I then kissed my teeth jokily and laughed. “Don’t you have nothing to say J?” Trey then said “I have the rights to remain silent” I said and laughed. “Joker! Go on then Keenan & Kel get in the car” Trey said as he unlocked the car for me and Kieran. “Ah shit” I said as I sat down in the passenger seat “What’s wrong with you?” Trey asked with concern as he fastened his seat belt “I left my bike parked up outside the estate” I sighed heavily as I pushed my head back against the head rest “What estate?” Kieran asked as he lifted his head up “It doesn’t even matter now. Someone probably stolen my bike by now” I replied as I shook my head in disbelief “That’s mad. So where are we going?” Trey asked as he put his keys into the ignition, I then turned and looked at Kieran who was sitting in the backseat then looked at Trey and said “We need to go to the hospital, we need to go see mum”.

I told Rodney about what happened that night and he said ‘That we were slippin’ and was stupid to get caught by the police’ and that same month Rodney got arrested for GBH and got sentenced to 3 years in prison and he said I was slippin’. He had to do at least 22 months; Mum and I visited him as much as we could but then Rodney started to change. I think being inside really got to him plus it didn’t help that I was telling about everything that was going on outside so he eventually told us that he wanted us to stop visiting him. I guess he thought that if he never saw us he could cope better but he didn’t realise how much that hurt me not seeing him because I wanted to be there for him but I guess he did what he had to do for him. That time was hard, but Ms Lee had a beautiful funeral, we all cried, sometimes I still drop a tear for her, I wish she was here, damn I still miss her.

“Hey Jemmel we need to start driving there. What are you smiling about?” “I’m just thinking about Mum, I wish she was here man”. “Me too bruv, me too. Come on man Ella and Ashley are waiting in the car and I’ve got to drop her and Ashley at Danielle’s house”. “Damn I forgot Danielle was coming” “That’s going to be so funny your secondary school girlfriend at your wedding, I swear only you could do something like that”. “And only you would laugh at something like that” “Don’t act like you wouldn’t laugh if it was me”. “Yeah you’re right. Anyway let’s go”.

“What’s good Ell’s? How’s my little solider doing?”. “I’m alright Jemmel. But this little man giving me trouble, more of his teeth are coming through now so he’s a bit whiney today” “He’s never whiney with me though init Ash, your never angry at uncle init?” “Uncal Jay”. “See Ashley loves me but look at him though, he’s a big man now and he looks like his daddy, even has his head shape” “Aww you leave my baby’s head shape alone”. “Thank you baby” “I was talking about Ashley. Haaa!”. “You got to give a five for that one” “Ha Ha Ha you two always got jokes it was better when you guys used to cuss each other”. “Just start the car K” “Anyway, are you nervous Jemmel?” “Nah not really…” “Why are you lying, you’ve been up since morning shitting bricks”. “Kieran! Watch your mouth in front of Ashley, anyway you shouldn’t be you know she’s a good women” and Ella was right, there’s been a few girls plus wifey in my whole life that I’ve treated right and they treated me right back, one of them of course is Zara, another one was Laila.

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