Shit! I'm Sorry!

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Chapter 25~ Those Liquor Lips

Chapter 25

That’s right Alexis; you just go ahead and wipe those damn tears, because all you do is screw things over and you’re one complete mess.

I laughed bitterly to myself. My thoughts were right...I am one big mess.

It was now 7:30 pm which meant I had been sitting in my car on the side of the road for three hours. Ok, time to get it together Alexis. I breathed in and out. Drying my eyes with my denim sleeve, I then started my car and drove home.

As I drove into the driveway I saw a figure sitting on my front porch...

How cliché.

As I hopped out and got closer to the porch, my eyes made direct contact with Ryan’s.

Then and there I melted. My heart broke. My jaw was wide open and my breathing hitched. The figure in front of me was not my Ryan. It was a broken and injured boy sitting on my porch steps looking so empty.

A cry escaped my mouth and straight away covered my mouth with my hand. I did this to him? How? Why?

Because you’re a dumbass Alexis that’s why.

“Ryan” I breathed out.

He just stared and then raised his eyebrows.

“Oh, look who it is? Alexis Harrington. My Muffin” he slurred.

He had been drinking. God dammit.

“My muffin is talking to me. Ha, that hasn’t happened in a while. I tried calling like a million times and texted you constantly that I think I lost count”.

“Ryan please-”

“No” He cut me off, “Don’t say a thing. I’ve had enough for the night”

“Ryan you’ve been drinking” I stated.

“Thanks captain obvious but I’m just trying to fucking control myself right now”

His harsh words had taken me aback. They really hurt. So he wants to act like a jerk? Well, two can play at that game.

“Oh really? Then what are you doing on my front porch drowning yourself with liquor?”

His face softened immediately and he looked away. He breathed deeply in and out and shook his head slightly.

“I just wanted to know you got home safe” He admitted.

Well, I wasn’t expecting that response. Did he wait for me? Wow.

Immediately my heart lost all its fire and crumbled into the softness of his words.

“Really? Why?”

He stepped towards me and held both my shoulders which had now melted under his touch.

“Because...I...I really...” He stuttered. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and his eyes which looked straight into my own. But how could explain my feelings of what he said next?

He cleared his throat and looked at me confidently. “Because, Alexis Harrington I really like you. And oh my fucking gosh it’s killing me. You’re killing me. But in the best way possible. Like I can’t even explain it because I’ve never felt like this before. Dammit, Alexis what are you doing to me?”

At this point, a tear had streamed down my cheek. Not of sadness but of joy and love. I smiled at his words. Out of all people who to say it...Ryan Einstein. A boy of many bad ass skills and looks. He chose me to say it to and oh my god do I feel special right now.

Even amongst all this chaos happening, could I really, ever be truly mad at Ryan? As I said before, I just don’t have it in me.

There was no reply. I had no words. So I just jumped in his arms, wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck and I just kissed him. I kissed him like I had never kissed before.

I could taste the liquor, the hurt and the happiness all in one burst. But this is what I liked. I like the way he kissed me, I like the way he smiles at me, I like the way he laughs and jokes around, I like how he can switch from being so serious to the most passionate person I’ve met. I just like him.

But is ‘like’ all there is?

We both part for air and all I could see and feel are smiles and love.

“So that’s what this is?” I accidently said aloud.

“What is?” Ryan asked but I had better answer.

“Is this...I don’t know...love?

He just smiled adorably as I was still in his arms.

“I guess it is Muffin, I guess this is love. Our type of love”

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