Dude's A Lady

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Chapter Three

“This is really stupid.” I grumbled indifferently.

“No, it’s necessary.” Sawyer pointed out.

“I’m not going to hit on girls while you’re gone, so why am I doing it now?” I was fine with dressing and talking like him. I had trained for a week already, but now this was ridicules.

“Because I’m a guy. And I don’t want the other guys to think I’m gay because I haven’t hit on a girl. So this needs to happen.”

I tugged at the wig my brother forced on me and frowned. “You’re ignorant and this stupid wig is fucking itchy!” I complained.

“Too damn bad, now come on.”

“No! I look like an idiot!” I pouted planting my feet firmly on the ground.

“No, you look freaking hot!” He countered.

“That’s because I look just like you!” I hissed.

“Exactly, you look like a freaking stud!” He smiled tugging me along.

“More like a dud.” I mumbled under my breath.

“Heard that.” he sang.

“You were supposed to.” I mocked him.


“Okay red head at ten o’clock.” He whispered.

I turned my head towards the Sunglasses hut. No red head though…

“I said ten o’clock not twelve.” He hissed. I still didn’t know what he was talking about though! This whole twelve o’clock- one o’clock thing was confusing!

“Oh my god Sawyer this is stupid!” I ground out in the male voice, I had perfected. I was surprised how easily I sounded like Sawyer.

“She’s over by the purse kiosk.The red head looking through the purple purse.” He pointed with his nose.

“Oh my god, I love her top!” I squealed like a true girl. Beside me I heard Sawyer sigh, exasperated.

“Vivi focus! You’re going over there to flirt not fangirl over her top!” He said.

“Fine.” I raised my hands. Begrudgingly, I walked towards the red head. I really do love Sawyer if I’m willing to flirt with a girl.

I slowly crept up to her, before I reminded myself the rule of stride. Which in my opinion, is really dumb. Basically it goes like this-

‘Walk like you own the fucking place.’

My brothers words, not mine.

“Hey girl.” I said nodding my head at her and narrowing my eyes in a smoldering way, “What’s your name?”

“Tiffany.” She blushed.

“The name’s V-Sawyer.” I quickly recovered, “Just moved to town and looking for a loyal girl. You wanna be her?” Bite the lip seductively. Sawyers voice echoed through my mind.

She responded with a deeper blush and a giggle. Really? That’s all it fucking took to get here! I swear, if this turns girls on, then we’re lagging behind in evolution.

“I-I really like this leather jacket.” She mumbled fumbling with the leather material.

I lit up like a fucking christmas tree. “Oh my god thanks! I thought it would clash with these boots, but they totally match! I was thinking if I got a red leather purse it would totally-”

“Hey man!” Sawyers voice broke through. His hand rested on my shoulder squeezing it in warning.

“Uh oh yeah.” Act like a guy! “But what I really like is how you look in those jeans.” I purred craning my neck to look at her backside. “Size six in skinny jeans?”

The red head flinched back and made a hasty escape. Sawyer sighed loudly again and I knew I failed this round.

“Size six? Matching and leather accessories?” He cocked his head and slapped me upside the head. “Really Vivi what the hell were you thinking?”

“Fashion is my kryptonite.” I shrugged, “In all fairness, I think that went better than I thought. And she was totally into me before that whole fashion debacle back there.”

“We have some work to do.” He groaned slugging away.


It had been two weeks of straight Sawyer boot camp. Some was easy. Like football practice. That was when I had the most fun, and it made it almost worth it.

But then there were drills like, snag a date in ten minutes. I hated that the most. I did however snag three dates in one week.

Basic Sawyer training was pretty simple. All I had to do was walk, talk, and act in all things Sawyer. That was the perk of being his twin. I already knew what he wanted before he even batted an eyelash.

So now it was our final test. Mom was leaving in the morning for Australia. Sawyer was leaving for Verona in the evening. And I was starting my first day of school in two days.

“Walk!” Sawyer shouted out.

‘Walk like you own the damn place!’

“Talk!” He commanded.

Slow and steady…never eager. Drawl, but don’t sound mental!

“Pick up line!” I rolled my eyes and talked to his pillow which we had named, Patricia.

“Hey beauty, can I introduce you to my beast?” I smirked.

“Perfect!” He cried out, “You did it Vivi. You’re ready for the kingdom of dude.”

“Couldn’t have done it without you…or really wouldn’t have to do it if it wasn’t for you.” I grumbled.

Sawyer sniffled and rubbed his eyes, “Is this how a father feels? I…I think I feel pride for my little Vivi-kins!” He cried out, smothering me in bear hug.

“You’re so weird!” I cried out, my voice muffled by his shirt.

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