Why Did I Disappear?

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Chapter 13: Confliction and Charge

I ended up sleeping in a chair in Luke’s hospital room again. Anxiety tires you out, I guess.

I woke up at 5:00 am.

Trev was still sleeping but he must have gotten up at some point cause he wasn’t in the same position.

It was pitch black outside and windy.

I glanced at my phone. Aaron had tried calling me at eight-thirty last night. He’d only tried three times, I guess he decided it could wait.

God, I was so tired still even after nine hours of sleep. I settled back down and went back to sleep.


The night was long and lonely. I missed Dean. He was one of the nicest people I’d ever met. He understood about Samuel and he defended me from his own family. I wanted to see him again.

Make sure he was okay.

I had his number but it felt kind of rude to call him at five in the morning. I’d probably be disturbing his sleep or work.

Maybe I’ll go to the hospital. It would be nice to get to know his brother and his boyfriend. I didn’t want to intrude though.

I sit staring at myself in the mirror. The black eye has turned brown and yellowish. The scatches look like I got in a fight with the neighbor’s cat.

I liked him but didn’t want to make his life worse.

I didn’t know what I could do that would help him at this point. I was conflicted about whether I should go to the hospital and be there for him or back off and wait for things to calm down.

My phone started to ring at five-fifty. The number displayed was Dean’s but when I picked up it was his brother, Luke.

“You need to get here. We think he just had a heart attack. They say it was a blood clot. He’s going into surgery to have it removed cause blood-thinning drugs are a concern because of his sex-change surgery,” he says slightly panicked. “They say he doesn’t have any brain damage and that he’ll live but I still think you should be here when he wakes up.”

“Okay, Luke. I’ll be there soon. Thanks,” I reply quietly.

Heart attacks weren’t common in people this young but it normally was caused by blood clots or blockages.

I was worried that this would affect his mental state. All his late nights and worrying probably hadn’t helped. His mother was probably worried sick.

I don’t know where his father would be or what he’d be doing.

I raced out to my car and got on the highway to the hospital. It was a forty minute drive and I was worrying all the way there. And I would be till he woke up and healed to a hundred percent. He wouldn’t be able to work for a while. Or go places for a week or two at the least. But he probably still try to escape the hospital’s confinement. He didn’t seem like the type of person to sit around.

When I arrived Dean was in still in surgery getting the blood clot removed.

Luke and Trevor were sitting silently, you could tell they were worried.

Dean’s mom came bustling in with coffee and breakfast for everyone. And as joyful a person as she seemed to be you could tell she too was worried about her son.

Nobody talked much.

Their mother’s phone started to ring. She stepped out after glancing at the screen name and cursing.

“What do you want?” she hissed.

“Dean just had a fricking heart attack so no, I’m going to go back to Bristol with you after you’re charged, you moron,” she hisses again.

“Stop, he is our son, he is Haley,” she hisses angered. “Grow up, Nick! You’re not twelve anymore. This is unacceptable. ”

“No, I’m staying till he’s out of the hospital. He may not be your child but he is mine and I love him, okay? You should be supportive, you’re his dad. Honestly, what’s wrong with his being a guy and Luke liking guys? That’s like saying you can’t be male and love me,” she exclaims.

“Yes, it is the same, Nick. It’s not any different,” she replies quickly.

Nothing more was said. She came back, I think she hung up on him.

A couple hours later Dean was rolled back into the room. He was still out but they said the damage wasn’t severe and that he should be fine. Of course, there was always that chance, that he wouldn’t remember us or wake up even.

I wonder if that happened if he’d deny being transgender, now whether that meant he wanted to be a girl again or that he’d been a guy since he was born was a different matter.

I wondered about a lot of things. Would he remember me? Would he still be the same person? Or would he change?

All things we wouldn’t know till he woke up. Which wouldn’t be for another four or five hours probably.


At 2:30 pm the same day...

I woke up, my vision was blurry at first but soon it cleared up. I looked around. Luke was in his hospital bed beside me. What had happened? I remember falling asleep in a chair across from him and Trev but now I was in my own hospital bed like I had passed out in the middle of the floor or something. My chest hurt. Rebecca was talking to my mother and Luke. Trev must have left to get coffee or something. What time was it? The sun was up, it had been dark the last time I’d been awake.

“What happened?” I croaked.

My chest hurt more when I spoke.

“He’s awake,” Luke commented.

“Did I get shot or something?” I croak again.

“No, you had a heart attack. Blood clotting caused it. They had to do surgery,” my mother replied gratefully.

“Well, his memory seems intact,” Luke comments.

“I’m sorry but who is she,” I ask jokingly pointing at Rebecca. “I’m kidding. So did you lose your boyfriend to a hot nurse or something?”

“Very funny, Dean. You don’t seem to have lost your sense of humor either. He had to go to work because if he doesn’t work we won’t be able to buy a house later if we decide to move in together, ” Luke replies.

“Oh, you’re moving in with him now? What about me? You going to let me stay at my house by myself. What if I have another heart attack?” I joke.

“It was an idea, you consider these things when you start a relationship, Dean,” he comments sarcastically.

Aaron appeared in the doorway.

“Trev told me what happened. Do you know when you’ll be able to work again?” Aaron asked sounding concerned.

“No, why did you try to call me last night? Did you find something?” I asked.

I was going to call him back but obviously, a lot had happened.

“Yeah, ah, your dad illegally smuggled some items into the country. I found them in his hotel room and he said he brought them from England. We can legally send him back to Bristol where he will be charged. And you have a sister,” he added.

“What?” I and Luke say in unison.

Mom glances at the floor nervously.

“Turns out, Dean, that the day you were born, you were born along with your twin sister, Maya, but Maya was more open about her gender issues. At three years old, she started wanting to be a boy and your dad took Maya and left her on the step of an orphanage,” he whispered. “His name is Peter Campbell now, he lives in Florence, Alabama with his wife and kid.”

“Do you have an address or cell phone number?” I asked excited to get in touch with the twin I could of related to all these years.

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