Diaroom: A Room of Abaddon's Memories

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Chapter 3: The Gallery of Misery

"Without someone guiding me, I got lost.
First, I was bullied.
Second, I became neglectful of my studies.
Third, I was easily misguided by the people around me.
Fourth, I developed an anxiety disorder.
Fifth, I subconsciously hid my true self and created a persona to catch all of the negativity that was thrown all over me.
Sixth, it started sense what others could not sense, and that scared it a lot.
Seventh, it still kept my intelligence. However, it was no longer the best. It fell down and it never got back up.
Eight, the current persona subconsciously created another persona, one that was able hold another baggage full of negativity.
Ninth, the bullying got worse even when it transferred to another school.
Tenth, it became weak and pathetic. Its anxiety got worse and whenever it got overly stressed, it would end up having an upset stomach. In other words, diarrhea.
Eleventh, it learned how to fake my emotions, it became apathetic. More accurately, it didn't care anymore.
Twelfth, the current persona created a new one the manipulative one. It became prideful and more unstable.
Thirteenth, all created personas unconsciously created the scariest persona of all, the demon. The demon spent its time asleep. It would only awaken when the current persona got angered or pissed off. The current persona would lose itself as the demon took over.
The demon, despite having the body of someone who was weak and pathetic, had the strength and speed of six average human beings. It was full of id and it lacked superego. Its heartbeat would reach up to or more than two hundred beats per minute. Its eyes are constricted and its grin was horrifying.
It was wild and sadistic. Its fingers were curled like they were claws, and its feet were tiptoed at all times. Its legs and arms were bent while it hunched over to better see, smell, and hear its target.
Fourteenth, this led to the creation of the fifth and the sixth personas. They would take over at random intervals.
The fifth was the possessed and depressed. He rarely ate and rarely bathed. He would spend a lot of time resting and idling around. He would neglect his basic needs and would waste time with people that he rarely knew. He would waste money on stuff that would give him temporary happiness... sleep, games, bars, and women.
The sixth was another me from a previous life, way older than this one. I believe that it probably was the one who made the Diaroom. He was a dreamer and he knew that something would happen to me. So, he started storing mementos, this pin included. This pin was like an outline of the complete picture of my life.
He brought me back in control and told me about our Diaroom. He told me to record everything before it was too late. At first, I tried putting in lies but then, I realized that it never recorded them. So with this pin, I started telling the truth.
I blame myself, my family, my fake friends, my relatives, my circumstances, my upbringing, my curse, and my whole destiny.
With this pin, I hope that you, the next in line to inherit the Diaroom, the next me, will learn from my mistakes. If only I remembered that I owned this Diaroom at an early age, it would have made a great difference in my life.
My life is not worth living for, trust me. My life is wasteful, I guarantee. My life is not as good as my previous life, I've seen it. My life, I hope that if you continue viewing it using my next memento, then you must remember to not let it affect your current life."

"Damn... Damn... Damn it all... I don't think that I can still continue looking at his life for now. Don't worry, I am way different than you think I am. For now, I will take what you've shown me to heart. It will be lesson learned on my part as the current one alive.
If I have the courage to view his second memento for tomorrow, then I will return here. His second memento was a notebook. This will probably explain a lot of things. Diaroom, I will continue my current life as usual.
I've decided. I will continue viewing his gallery. I believe that his life, no matter how negative it was, is still worth living.
Noel Von Gondra"
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