is the world in its right mind?

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courage

COURAGE

the light of the sun betrayed again. everyday it does. it’s nothing new. slowly it gets dark and nothing is seen except some stars. it does so everyday. it’s nothing new. don’t you get tired of this? it does this everyday. what does it want us to know? nothing, to be honest. it is just something that happens like you have to pee when you drink water. it just happens. when you open your, you see. just like that.

what is that you think by writing this? what does you want them to know? isn’t it okay to just let things as they are? they doesn’t have to know, right? everyday is just like this. saying, it’s not important. saying, they don’t have to know. saying, i am just a human. saying, it’s okay to be like this. waking up and starting to put hypes you feel the entire in the back of your mind. there should be nothing new. there should be nothing worth mentioning. nothing at all. it’s been hours now. it’s been days now. it’s been weeks now. it’s been months now. it’s been an year now. the counting goes on. seventy eight thousand four hundred sixty three. seventy eight thousand four hundred sixty four. it’s goes on. it’s nothing new. seconds over seconds. hours over hours. days over days but the wait never ends. it’s been ages that you have forgotten what you were waiting for. why are you telling them this? what will you gain from this?

this is what interests me.

new days keep on banging on the door. the door vibrates in its frame. legs barely can be felt. head is tilted down waiting for the hype to end. eyes fixed on the still ground. hands are covering ear. no more sounds. no more words. no more sentences. no more thoughts. no more dreams. it’s better this way. is that what you want them to know, you coward? well, yes. this silence drowns your thoughts, whether good or bad. it slowly drains you. you lose the light of your eyes and this world becomes similar to you. walking to the door, you open it indeed. no one is expecting you to dance at the door, now. you walk out and ignore the day. no one is stopping you. with this realized, you come across opportunities. courage. it’s what you need, right? but what you have is enough, right? you can’t keep on asking for every random opportunity you see, right? you want to break free. you- you- you but can’t because there should be nothing new. yeah, you don’t have to. but you can’t. you leave a window when you can’t. when you don’t, you seal everything.

if i have enough courage to walk out and ask whys then, i could....but courage, just how much of it is needs.
the sun’s light betrays again. it’s does that everyday. it’s nothing new. nothing’s new.

it’s feel like i am too big for this house or i am too fat for these free size t-shirts or i am too stupid to be in this college or i am too dumb to be in the group of delinquents or i am too much of a child to be grown 23 year old. it’s like i don’t deserve anything. not even drinking filtered water. like i should be drinking my own blood to stay alive.

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