Where is Cassandra

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“Bumboclaat!” I exclaimed like I was a Jamaican, out of surprise and shock, when Stefi told me the truth I was out to discover.

“I was out to prove I could have babies and that if there was any problem, it would not be from me,” she had begun her story. “And it was in the process of trying to prove myself that I met a man whom I understood had no qualms about playing the kind of game I wanted. Then I fell for his charm that tickled my fancy, and his exciting unorthodox style. I was hooked on him, especially at the point when my relationship with you had hit its all-time lowest. He was the porn I could not stop watching. You were the darkness and he brought light. His touch, patience and mastery of every inch of what my body wants are out of this world. I’m married to you, Jan, but he made me a bitch and I grabbed my liberation. Somewhere along the line, Tammy, Hadley and Dick became the result. And I won’t lie to you. I’m still loving it.”

“Bumboclatt,” I had to yell again.

It was him! He was the one I did not suspect. It never crossed my mind that it could be him. Did he know his job and expertise would eventually point me in the direction to what he had done? Ask him when you see him. Ask Greg Graz, the fertility specialist and the biological father of Tammy, Hadley and Dick. It was at this time that those signs in his office made sense to me. Life is Too Short, Have an Affair! He lived by those inscriptions. It was a philosophy he cherished.

“I asked him why he would have such inscriptions in his office when I went to meet him,” Stefi had told me. “He told me it was what he believed in,” stefi had said to me further. “And there was nothing to stop us when I told him I was also up for it,” Stefi went ahead to inform me. I had broken down and was already in tears by now, though not the way a child would do it. It was in such a way that a drop coursed down each of my eyes. I tried to not let it happen, but I was not strong enough.

“So what happens to us?” I had asked Stefi. She took one long look at me and laughed.

“I’m hooked, Jan,” she said. “I’ve said it before. Didn’t you hear me?”

“This is our marriage I’m talking about,” I said, believing Stefi had no idea what I had first talked about.”

“No use hanging on when you’ve been shown to be a man who can’t make a woman a mother. Would you hang on if you were a woman? We can continue to live together. I have no problem about that. But don’t expect me to warm up to you when you can’t bring on the show, if you know what I mean.”

“The show? Now you’re suddenly interested in having more children?” Stunned, I asked.

Stefi laughed.

“The show?” She said. “I’m already pregnant for the one man that knows how to bring it on,” she informed me. “Two weeks,” she went ahead to say with excitement.

“And that would be Greg?” I asked, not wanting to believe it was him again.

“Who else?” Stefi announced.

Did I say I was speechless? That was what I had to be in my helpless hopeless situation, for lack of what more to say, when I knew at that point there was nothing left of my life. Why me?

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