CHAPTER TWENTY NINE
I thought I had to probably go so far away from Virginia to be able to set my eyes on The Voice. Somewhere deep down my heart, my deep yearning for companionship made sure I did not care about any sort of distance I had to walk to make that happen. But to my surprise, The Voice started to give me directions intended to lead me to a near-by park. A park? Wow!
That is where I love to go and sit down and watch you, Jan,” said the voice. I’m right there waiting for you.
“Really?” I said, walking along, as The Voice kept directing me.
“What else do you do with your life besides waiting for me?” I asked, getting more curious, more interested in The Voice, in as much as it all felt ridiculous because The Voice was yet no one I could hold and touch and possibly kiss.
A lot, said the voice in response to the question I had asked. And they are all about waiting for you. Our lives can’t really start until we get together.
What was driving the feeling of love I had begun to have inside me, I could not tell. It all was getting as exciting as much as it felt strange.
“I hope you don’t mind my asking you this question again,” I said.
Go ahead, Jan.
“Who really are you?”
Who am I?
“Are you from somewhere in Virginia or Chicago or New Hampshire or Buffalo?”
That is what you’re about to find out.
Even though distance would not have been able to serve as a barrier that could stop me from reaching anywhere The Voice would wait for me, not even if it meant travelling to the East Coast, or up north to Seattle, I was all the same happier that I did not need to go so far at all. It was on a summer Saturday. The time was twenty five minutes past five in the evening, and the park had many folks in it—senior citizens, teenagers, youngsters I thought were in their early twenties and early thirties, as well as kindergarten kids: Some strolling, some laughing, some chatting, and some playing improvised baseball games. The atmosphere was nothing but fun-filled, as slight breeze that was around, made leaves of trees that surrounded the park dance about.
I had my mind firmly fixed on my goal, in spite of all leisurely activities hovering all around me. None could distract me.
Look right in front of you, the voice said to me. I did as I was told. I had never been so expectant. I was a bit edgy, my glances scurrying to all directions.
“I see a lot of people,” I said, my response being more of complaint. “Which of them would be you?”
Let’s take it slow and easy. How about making this exercise a bit romantic? I can’t wait to hug you and run my fingers through your lovely hair.
“I can’t wait to give you a hug…. and fill your face with kisses,” I responded.
I’m hugging you now… I just kissed your lips…
“Oh… stop kidding. Where are you…?”
Relax, Jan. Those in a hurry often miss the point.
Are you sure you want to do this, Jan?
“Yeah….. More than anything else… Yeah… Where are you? I want to run to you… But why are you playing all this like a game?”
Because that’s one of the sweetest parts of you and me together.
I love you, Jan.
“I love you too,” I said in response.
I am warning you, Jan. I’m ugly.
What if I turn out to be a black beast with ten curved horns? Dracula? A werewolf?
“Don’t try to be a clown,” I said and laughed. “People around you will always forget to laugh.”
Now look to your left.
I did as I was told once again, from where I stood.
“I’m doing that now,” I reported, urging The Voice with my hurried tone to get on with it. If meeting the human behind The Voice was a crime, then that was one hell of a crime I was bent on committing.
You’re not sure you want to do this, Jan!
“What do you mean? I don’t care if you are a sort of thing that makes people scream and reach for their torches and pitch forks. You show me love and I want to see you and kiss you and tell you how much more I love you. You’re so romantic, warm, and must be Princess charming…”
“Yeah... Instinct tells me so… You have a name, don’t you?”
Call me Cassandra.
“Oh! What a sweet name! I like that!”
Jan, there is a tree you’re looking at right now. A lanky tree.
“That’s true,” I said. There was a lanky looking tree ahead.
Do you see a man sitting under it and reading a book?
“Oh… no… you can’t be a man,” I said, being a little unpleased. “I can’t start being gay now.”
“Don’t worry about that. Go to him. He used to be my husband.”
“Used to be? You’re divorced?”
“What do you mean?”
Jan, asking more questions now means knowing less of me. Obedience lands those that embrace it into the light they seek. No more questions, Jan. Go!
And Cassandra had only set me up for what was yet to come.