"Only words bleed." (3)
7th of July 2017 (Friday)
We were supposed to go back home, but Beth begged me that we should stay for a while. So we are staying in Vienna, Austria, for a week now. We went out shopping almost every night at Mariahilferstraße; my friends became sick of it. So to change the scenery, Beth researched and took us out to Stephansplatz for sightseeing one weekend. It was just as gorgeous as Rome, and I would love to go back there someday. It felt like walking to Gringotts (smack me for being a Potterhead). Some days I roamed alone; it is a habit of mine. Ryan and I were on video chat most of the time, anyway, so it didn’t feel like I was alone at all.
22nd of July 2017 (Saturday)
It’s our last day here in Europe. I’m already packed and ready to leave tomorrow. All I have to do is roam for a while and soak up the richness. I’ll be back in a few.
OH, YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE WHO KNOCKED ON OUR HOTEL ROOM DOOR. Jace! I was so surprised when he asked me to hang out. I tried texting Ryan, but he was not replying, so I told him what I would be up to today. He was in New York already, and I bet he was busy.
Jace took me to his private plane (as spontaneous as he is), and we went to London and DelaCour Estate, my childhood home! He showed me a series of text messages he exchanged with my Nana Charlie. In my childhood home, Jace wanted to visit the places I went to when I was younger. It was really funny how much he wanted to get to know me. He and I would be great friends. He also showed me around where he grew up.
When he flew me back to Austria, the sun was slowly setting down to the other side as the sky bathed in orange, pink and purple clouds. We went to Schloss Schönbrunn, and he led me to the beautiful garden. I didn’t have time to book a reservation, but he remembered that I wanted to go to Café Gloriette.
When we reached the end of the gardens and climbed the steep path walk (mind you, it was like nine in the evening, so technically the cafe should still be open), there was no one around except for the staff. I had no idea Jace Richardson’s name was massive to have this kind of treatment. The lights were on, and the pavilion was shimmering in the rays of sunset. The café was empty of tourists and locals, but a table for two, with lit candles, was in the middle of the room. For a friend, it was a bit too much. So I asked him why he was doing that, he just smiled and made me turn around. Ryan was standing there, in his suit. I was really surprised that I gaped at Jace.
He left us alone and talked to one of the staff. It felt like Ryan was going to propose to me, but he didn’t. He held my hand across the table and told me he loved me.
I calculated why Jace took me out to London and why Ryan wasn’t answering my calls and text, and it was because he was on a plane to Austria. How romantic.
23rd of July (around three in the middle of the night)
He booked a hotel room. We might be tired from the trip, but it didn’t stop us. Ryan and I made love all night. ;)
25th August 2017 (Friday)
Ryan and I talked through Skype, Snapchat, and all the online social media, the works, every time we were free but, it was hard, different time zones too, now that he’s living in California. What we had back in Europe was fun and vibrant… and hot. But not having that physically every day was driving us crazy. It also felt like we were growing apart, and even if he didn’t show or tell me, I felt that Ryan was jealous of my friendship with Jace. He left me. HE LEFT ME!! I just… I couldn’t stop him, we both respect each other’s opinions and decisions so much, and we both want to be fair to one another. He told me that he wanted me to be happy even if it’s not with him, FOR THE SECOND TIME!
I think he broke up with me, I just…. UUUGHHH!!
Dion, Beth, D, Lea and Ros are here in my room right now, ordering pizza, comforting me from this horrible breakup. I didn’t even tell Ryan how much I love him, yet he told me he does thousands of times.
Jace called me almost immediately when he heard the news from Beth. You know, even though he is this rich, famous actor, he is just your average guy. Actually, the sweetest, the nicest, and the most romantic guy I’ve ever met. He is old-fashioned too, which I like most about him. I bet he would come running just to cheer me up right now, but he is living in London now, while I am here, in New York. At least I have my friends here with me. April also texted me to cheer up, and she’ll come to visit for Ros’ and my birthday next month. And then mum called me and gave me an earful about how things flow, and it’s completely normal. Don’t I have the most supportive and awesome people?
But, I can’t still shake the feeling of never having Ryan’s touch ever again.