They assumed she was a sinner,
For she was always found alone,
Yet the real culprits were never questioned,
For they murdered behind closed doors.
12 December 2010
I continued to play nice but since they showed no sign of surrender, I knew exactly what I was going to do next.
I planned on messing around with everyone around me and causing indescribable chaos until they got tired of me and handed my playstation back.
It wasn't the smartest of the plans I normally put together but this was the only strategy that had crossed my mind.
I knew better then to ask Lucas or Noah for help for I was certain they would snitch on me any chance they got or would probably blackmail me for the rest of my life.
My thoughts clouded my conscious as sleep consumed me.
The next morning my sleep was disturbed as streaks of light peaked through the plain caramel tinted blinds and crept upon my face, welling up an unpleasant feeling that started to take its effect from my forehead down to the tips of my toes; invading my scrumptious dreams of cotton candy clouds and glittery unicorns; jolting me awake.
I was beyond tired therefore I let the feeling subside and shut my eyes once more, hoping to fall right back to my very own exclusive utopia but that didn't last too long as a knock on the door diminished my sleep once again.
"What do you want?"
I was far too irritated to bother considering the consequences if either mum or dad were on the other side.
Rania walked in with an apologetic smile plastered on her lips. "Don't you think you've slept enough?"
She asked and when I glared at her hard, she took her bottom lip between her teeth and bit down hard.
"I guess not than", she answered her question herself as if I wasn't present in the same room as her.
If only she had known how I wouldn't be able to sleep nor shut my lids for months on end,
how my eyes would resemble a clot of blood not so soon after; would she have let me sleep in.
Rania was a maid who had worked for us ever since I opened my eyes.
She was always there for me; honestly speaking she was never much of a servant to me, more like a friend.
Someone who knew all my secrets and I knew hers.
Raina was beyond striking and one could never tell she was in her late forties until they were informed.
Her skin a chocolate brown while her hair were jet black.
She had been through a lot in her hell excuse of a life but she never let it show, she hid her white hair with dyes and her pain and sorrows with an angelic smile.
She was a great listener and one of the reasons why I never really felt the need to go to my parents for advice, I had her and she made sure I was fine, even if that meant she had to sit for hours, torching herself listening to my rants.
To be completely honest; I was never a big fan of having maids, I claimed they deserve better and that it's highly unfair is it that they were born in poverty when I was born in riches.
They don't have food to eat while i have several different dishes served in front of me, three times a day.
How they were never able to go to school, be educated, lead a journey towards a respectful career; while I had everything lined up at my doorstep.
How they never had the privilege to basic necessities of life while I get whatever I please at the snap of my fingers.
They barely had stitched clothes to wear and clean water to drink.
So how was it fair?
If god claims that he loves all his creations equally than why aren't we created equal?
Why rich and poor?
Why believers and disbelievers?
Why not just humans?
After a whole bunch of convincing and threatening, Raina somehow managed to drag me downstairs for breakfast despite my disinterest in sitting with the rest of them and hearing my mother rant about how I'm using the wrong fork for the wrong dish.
I was just about to think of an escape back to my utopia when my orbs laid on the breakfast table and that thought left as fast as it had come.
The table was covered with all different types of dishes; Crossoients, jam and bread, nuggets and sausages, hash browns, toast, cream cheese, three different types of melted cheeses
And fruits which included; strawberries, bananas, pineapple, apples, watermelon, melon, litchis, guavas, kiwis and dragon fruits; all cut into square blocks and placed accordingly in their bowls.
I looked to the other side of the table which held the coffee, milk and teas, the juices were placed next to them.
I scanned the breathtaking golden tinted table as my eyes searched for the one thing my stomach ached for the most.
A silly smile made its way to my lips as I located the coco-pops.
I quickly greeted everyone a good morning as I seated myself on my respectful chair.
I grabbed the coco-pops and tilted the box till the bowl was about to overflow.
Than clutching the warm glass of milk, I poured its substance into the bowl, soaking the cereal into it.
Without wasting another moment, I grabbed a spoonful and shoved it into my mouth.
The flavour of chocolate exploded in my mouth withdrawing a soft moan from the back of my throat, my eyes shut in esascaty.
I opened my eyes as I slowly swallowed the substance down my throat, I couldn't help but notice they all were staring at me.
Mum and dad shared glances, while by the look on Lucas's and Noah's face, you could tell they were going to burst into laughter any second now.
My cheeks flushed and I let out an awkward laugh.
But that clearly didn't change the scenario as they kept their gazes locked on me so I did what I did best.
I began eating again.
Acting as if I was oblivious to their stares.
After I was done I picked up my bowl to lick it clean gaining a scoff from my mother and chuckles from the rest.
"Stop being so unladylike Malaika", she gritted through her teeth.
Despite my table manners; I never did much to irritate my mother and yet she would try her best to throw her nasty 'be a lady' comments whenever she got an opportunity to, very well aware that I hated it when she did that, she pretended as if girls couldn't do anything.
As if girls were weak.
she claimed that there was a certain way that girls are supposed to walk and talk and present themselves.
You know what I thought about it.
But I could've.
I could've been weak for her.
I could've put on those hideous dresses she always begged me to wear,
I could've not sworn or laughed loudly on the dinner table,
I could've thrown my PlayStation away all by myself; could've never touched a controller for the rest of my life,
I could've come down to eat on time for the rest of my life,
I would've done that all voluntarily,
If only I knew how little time I had left with them.
I jumped from my seat and gulped down my glass of guava juice in one go, then looked back at her matching her glare and walked away.
She used to tell me that women are fragile creatures,
Too overwhelmed with our emotions,
Maybe I did it just to prove her wrong,
To show to her the women aren't weak,
She was to blame.
15 January 2011
After a month of destroying everything and annoying the shit out of them, I haven't had much luck getting my game back yet.
But I certainly don't plan on quitting anytime soon.
I don't understand why everyone is being so nice to me, like the time I broke mums favourite vase, not to mention which not only costed her a fortune but meant quite a lot to her.
I felt like shit for doing so but it had to be done.
I told her that 'I was just trying to be more active like she had asked me to be' and was jogging around the house and she simply just smiled and stated that it was fine.
Then the time when I 'accidentally' threw a bundle of cash into the washing machine.
And when daddy got furious at the maids I walked up to him and stated that 'I was just trying to be active like mum had asked me to be' and helping around in house, that I didn't notice his jeans had money in them and I was sorry.
I expected him to be mad but he simply excused the maids and hugged me and said that he was proud of me.
Proud of me.
Do you hear that?
I'm going crazy here.
All this was becoming silly so I decided I was going for the big fish this time.
I walked into Noah's room at midnight and took a hold of his comic book collection.
He loved them; especially the brand new version of this book called; 'villains invaded'.
I left a couple of traces of them as hid them in my room, hoping that he'd follow the traces and throw a tantrum but he didn't.
He pretended as if nothing was missing and when I confronted him about them, he claimed that it was fine since I probably took them to read.
My heart began to sink at my defeat when an idea popped into my head.
"A page tore by m-mistake Noah, I s-swear I was just trying to flip the p-pages because m-mum had asked me to b-be more a-active and-"
I pretended to stutter, both fear and hope ignited in my eyes as I witnessed him clench his fists as if trying to control an outbreak, but he cut me off stating that it was fine.
I signed almost surrendering when I realised I still had one target left.
He was a hard shell to crack but I knew if I pulled the right strings, I was certain to win.
Not willing to put much effort on my last victim.
I recalled eavesdropping over his and mum's conversation as he asked her if he could have several of friends over later tonight.
The last couple of my brain cells danced in victory as she agreed.
I didn't have time to pull back and move away from the door which I had pressed my ear against as he walked out of the her bedroom and into the hallway.
As his eyes met mine he seemed surprised for barely a second before scoffing in an irritated manner.
He was really starting to get get on my nerves which made me feel far less guilty for what I was about to do.
He chuckled as I rolled my eyes and pushed past me muttering 'what a baby' before disappearing in the hallway.
Oh. He deserved everything that was coming to him.
Later that afternoon I could hear unfamiliar voices grow louder and louder as I made my way down the stairs.
Here we go Malaika.
You've handled throwing punches upon punching bags, how hard could this possibly be.
It wasn't that I couldn't handle punching the shit out of him just I did every day while training.
It was just that those punching bags didn't punch back,
Oh boy but Lucas,
He was definitely going to.
I replayed the plan in my head as I walked towards the living room.
1) walk in.
2) punch him.
3) run away.
4) find mom and dad.
5) cry and convince.
I mentally jotted it all down as I quietly walked into the living room,
1) walk in- check,
I encouraged myself.
I was greeted with a pack of perky cheerleaders and a dozen of guys I've never seen before; one was even lying shirtless with his stomach on the ground, probably trying to sail through all the dirt that littered the ground.
But that's not what caught my attention, what did was that the living room which was once elegantly decorated with breathtaking chandeliers that hung from the ceiling, the high living room ceiling too crafted like our parents room.
A dirty shade of peach tint painted on every piece of furniture present in the room, with fluffy plain carpets laid just underneath the table and the entrance and expensive decorations all placed accordingly making the room look exclusive and tidy,
Now resembled a fish market and trust me when I tell you that it was a horrifying sight.
The music blasted on the snowy white bluetooth speakers dad purchased just last week.
Wrappers of candy bars and packets of chips littered the milky marble floor, drinks spilled all over the sofas.
If mum and dad would have caught a glimpse of this, Lucas would have a whole lot of hell to face.
His face drained colour as he fell pale in just a couple of seconds.
I felt a sudden need to drag mum and dad here to show them the mess he had created but I was smarter than that.
I knew letting them in here would only destroy what I had planned and so I made up my mind as I made my way up to him silently because as you know it's always peaceful before a storm.
His eyes travelled with me, watching my every move like a predator ready to attack.
He glared at me, daring me to make on wrong move; and I looked right in his caramel orbs, matching his glare.
My steps came to a halt when I stood right across him as silence indulged us.
The music no longer playing increased the tension in the atmosphere.
Everyone else present in the room held nothing but confusion on their faces.
We stood like that for what felt like hours before Lucas broke the silence,
"What are you doing here-?",
I cut him off by as I punched him square in his jaw and then immediately cursed myself for doing so since my fist began to ache.
2) Punch him- check.
"Who's the baby now, huh?",
I mocked him as he stood there dumbfolded and I took that as an opportunity to make my escape.
I ran across the room and out the door as I could hear footsteps right behind me, fear took over my body as I started to procrastinate how badly he would hurt me if he caught up to me before I could reach my safe place.
3) run away- check.
Not giving it another thought I ran up to mums room and barged in, taking shelter between both mum and dad as I jumped onto their bed.
They seemed alarmed as they took in the events that just took place.
4) find mum and dad- check.
Lucas barged inside the room as well banging the door on his way in.
Dad narrowed his eyes at him and if I didn't know any better I would say he was ready to explode any second now.
After a couple of moments of mum and dad sharing confused glances, dad broke the silence,
"As much as me and your mother are enjoying witnessing our very own exclusive version of Tom and Jerry right here in our house, we would like to know what happened?",
I parted my lips to speak but Lucas cut me off,
"Oh you wanna know what happened? I'll tell you what happened. Your little "cupcake" here punched the shit out me. That's what happened", Lucas yelled, the corner of his lip busted just enough for a string of blood to escape, making him resemble a blood thirsty vampire, shaking my head violently, I snapped back into reality, my imagination is going to be the death of me someday.
"Language Lucas, we have ground rules in this house and your behaviour is not tolerable", mum complained.
"Do the ground rules include punching your older brother, cause if they do than please do inform me for I might have missed that one", Lucas mocked her as he pulled up his right sleeve to wipe off the little blood that remained. Such a baby.
"Watch your tone Lucas", dad gritted through his teeth warning him which Lucas immediately considered and the scowl on his face turned into an apologetic smile as he looked down at his feet and muttered a "sorry" under his breath but since the room was pretty quite, his voice reached us as a mere whisper.
Mom accepted his apology as she smiled back and nodes her head, then her gaze met mine and she narrowed her eyes at me,
"Care to explain Malaika", she asked as I felt Lucas's gaze burning holes into me, while dad had the sides of his lips curved up slightly as if he was finding all this amusing.
I signed as I furiously shook my head and pulled the duvet over me enough to cover my flushed cheeks.
God Lucas could run fast.
I made a mental note to myself of remembering that the next time I'll pull a stunt like this.
Dad chuckled as he pushed the duvet off me and helped me sit up,
"No, now that's not how it works cupcake, you either owe us an explanation or him an apology, take your pick", he stated.
I gave him the puppy dog eyes and even went to the extent of bringing my lips into a pout but he simply glared at me, urging me to speak.
"Well, daddy, I was just trying to be more active like mum had told to be, you see Lucas taught me how to throw the jaw punch just yesterday; then last night when we were done training he claimed that I wasn't paying attention and that I just wasn't good enough, so I stayed up all night practicing it and all I wanted was for him to be proud of me", I deepened my frown and forced a several crocodile tears to escape my eyes making my left eye twitch.
I had mastered the art of fake tears since the age of five, it was an easy way out of everything, from getting an extra cookie to blaming my wrong doings on my brothers,
All it took was a couple seconds of staring at a sudden object or place and abracadabra you can water a garden with the amount of tears that leak down my eyes.
"You're really buying this. She's lying. Straight to your faces", he spoke in a steady yet surprised tone as Noah walked in.
"She's doing it again isn't she? What a baby", Noah cooed teasingly, I cried louder making sure the increase in the volume of my whimpers didn't go unnoticed, which made both mom and dad glare down at them.
"That will be all Noah, both of you to your rooms now!", mum exclaimed as I tightened my grip on her encouraging her to continue scolding them.
As they began to walk out of the room I quickly stuck my tongue out in a way only they could view it and then went back to cuddling with the mommy as they muttered something under their breath clearly annoyed, making their way out and shut the door behind them.
One thing was for certain; I always got what I wanted.
I shut my eyes as mum held me close and dad caressed my cheek and with that thought replaying in my mind, I let sleep consume me.
They had always let me get what I wanted.
Always had let me win.
Maybe that is why I never considered losing an option.
They are to blame.