It was common in the village that I had returned and that one of the old infidels returned and did not the rest, so they held a secret customary sit-down because my family wanted to take what I have under the pretext of insanity and disbelief. I know if I excused him because he abandoned his ideas or not. They were very violent with him, holy and rash, even though he used to protect them from people and take care of their money while waiting for them to return to their senses, and yet they did not insult him except him. He keeps silent on that and that was a danger to him as he was still an actor in society.
I went out of the deserted house and returned to the village. I went to my house, he was not saying ruin from that house. I found Islam standing by it waiting for me and he told me: Do not worry, I will have someone clean and arrange it, come to me until it is arranged, I used to rent you these stores at the bottom of the house. Come take your right and sit with me
So I said thankfully to him: “Give me Islam, I don’t know how to thank you.”
He said, “for what is Shams?”
I walked with him to his house, it was a very luxurious house but I didn’t comment on that and he knew that I or we didn’t care about it.
He said: This role is at the bottom for a rash and sanctification. If they love they come, they come, my children love them very much and they too while they hate me, despite everything I love them and appreciate them very much and I feel their closeness and reassurance of their presence in the world. What is important is that I want you in something else.
We went up frightened and defeated, I wandering in my head and wandering around and he is, neither blossoming in our eyes nor shining. I watched his gazes as he spoke, he was very tense, frightened, bewildered, not.
On the ladder we met a son whose age seemed to be close to five years old, and he said to me: This is Ahmed, come greet your uncle Shams, I named him after his name
A tear ran in his eye and he tried to hide it, so I greeted the boy and kissed him, and I wanted to carry him, but he refused and entered their apartment.
And I said to him: Do you have other children?
He said: Yes, I have Magdy and Hypatia. I was named after Majdi, and if she had another, I would name Mazen, and Hypatia knew that we all loved her. My wife was amazed at the name, but I insisted on it.
We sat and he came to eat but I didn’t want to eat and I asked him if he had alcohol and he had a bottle of whiskey to hide, we started drinking and he started talking
He said in fear: Now your family or what they call your family want to take everything that you have under the pretext of your disbelief and your madness, and they want to prove that to you in any way, the unbeliever does not inherit and the insane person as well, and they try to do that in a legitimate way and dig behind you Where have you been? They did a secret customary session and I knew
I laughed very much and said to him: They are still planning for this; they never give up on humiliation
He said: I used to protect your home under the pretext of a power of attorney that you made to me and I was stalling in showing this non-existent power of attorney, they are serious about Shams and want to rob you of everything, keep your words and stay away from religion and irrational actions
I said to him: The solution?
He said: To return to your normal life and be active in society, even if in a formal way, and go to the mosque every period
I told him: You know that I will not go, but I will preserve my words and my actions
And he told me: Good, the most important thing is that the family of this informative boy, his educated brother, is suspicious of his suicide because he was only drunk and they want to check the body and you know what they will find and I am very worried about them.
I told him: What should I do? They are also violent with me
He said, “They have to go as quickly as possible, and I’ll save them money.”
I said: Do you think they will agree?
He said: They must agree, the matter is serious and they must do it, it is about their lives, tell them because they can never talk to me.
I told him: I will talk to them and I hope they listen and agree, I am not prepared for other losses
He got up and got me a big sum and said this is your right
I said to him: What is all this?
He said: It is your right. Today I have it until they prepare your house. I will return to my wife and children now and if I need anything, I am here.
I extended my body on the sofa and slept very quickly, it was a very difficult day and I did not expect it at all like this, everything really changed and changed in a strange way that no one expected, and what happened to me is what happened with Magdy and Mazen, but the difference is that they did not They leave the village, but it’s the same poetic feelings that cursed them with turmoil and madness. We were not poets writing, we were poets without writing, and this is perhaps what an unknown fate cursed us with. Our affection was strange. The lover is related to his lover to their unknowns, and freedom is linked to the other because it is embodied in it. The self is liberated in the other because it transcends it and is in it, and is free in it through love, just like Sufi love, but the difference is that Sufi love is openness to the absolute, while human love is openness to a creature, and destiny is enigmatic, and it is interwoven with relationship and affection. We do not know what will happen in the most logical way, so it is allowed. With poetry, that is, a vision.
I woke up very early, I took the money and went to them, I did not know where they are? But I thought that they were still in the deserted palace that, I walked to him, the fox was wandering in the village, it is her large now, he nodded to me and started chatting: Where are you going and what is this bag that you have?
I told him: You have nothing to do with that
He said: You are going to them, they hide every night and no one knows where they are going.
I could not stand the word until I grabbed his neck and turned it against the wall and said to him: Do not offend them, I will discard this rumen, you bastard
He said to me: Calm down, Shams. They do not deserve all of that and they agree to people insulting them. Why do you intervene?
I left him and went and bemoaned the old days, who had the strength and determination to respond to two bad people like that big fly, and he said as I walked: Very soon they will be taken, very soon, Shams.