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Since when has trying to reinvent the past ever changed the future? Damaged, angry and wryly aware, Mariah tries to reinvent herself - with sex, thoughts of murder and dangerous games., Obsession and love. Is there a difference? Conflicted, MARIAH REDFERN, abused and tormented, tries to out-run herself. She makes an impulsive move to MALAWI from South Africa. She intends a reinvention –to find a way to leave the Africa she loves and loathes in equal part. Instead she discovers the narrow, feral nature of ex-patriot life. Appalled but incapable of rising above it, she stumbles into an obsessive, damaging relationship with JEFF. This involvement obliterates any safeguards she may have had in place and the relationship deteriorates. Throwing herself into reactionary activities which further degrade, acutely aware of what she is doing and of her own nature, Mariah seems unable to stop. The past already has her burning her breasts with cigarettes and bruising her skin with her fists – now she deliberately chooses actions to further the pain which feels obligatory. JOE, a self-contained, observant man with a dangerous edge who possesses an acute facility for recognising Mariah’s nature with which he forces her to view herself. Mariah is ill prepared for the volatile rage which follows in her own wake.

Other / Drama
4.5 3 reviews
Age Rating:

Hard on

Obsession. Love. Does it matter? Perhaps not one bit. In Africa we talk about not eating an elephant in one bite. The suggestion is that things ought to be approached slowly, with caution, bite by bite. I had to eat the elephant and fast, and I ate even as it choked me. Nothing that came before suggested I try bite by small mouthful to get it down, but I have learned so much since then.

In Africa life is immediate, so present we have small choice but to accept our mortality. Life has a place at every table, in each room. It holds our names. So we do things harder here, sensing the end long before it even makes shadows. And I have done both. I have lived and loved headlong, with no sense of hold-back. With no control. Careening towards a darkening horizon, there is no time for an eye on the past. The past cannot matter.

It cannot matter, however much we may long to hold onto it. The past is simply what we are given and the future has no shape. The future is the sum of the collisions of all our private worlds, that’s all. It is not especially romantic or even exciting. It merely is so. Collision, chaos, life. Love. Past shortfalls cannot obviate future losses. Living becomes simple movement from then to now. And, having no chance for the pit-stops of ambiguity, we must choose to live. There is little else left to decide. And in living, we will love. We will love until we die.

This is the final truth, perhaps the one I wanted all along. I will love until I die. And in the meantime, Africa and I? We will live, hard-on.

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Further Recommendations

Amber Endsley: I really enjoyed every single part of this story. Not over done and not underdone ..... just right! I’ve read over ten stories and this isn’t first review because this story is amazing! Keep up the amazing work!!

K. Artifex: Read the full on Galatea and I criiiiiiied my eyes out on the last chapter. Such a fantastic story <3333

Grace: One of my favourite books to read, it is amazing

Alida Louw: Great storyline. Very good read, couldn't put my phone down read it I was couple of hours that's how good of a story it is 🤗 I hope there's a sequel otherwise work on the ending please 😁 most readers don't like to be left wondering 🤗love reading your books 📚

Katakin: The story is good for the soul. Finally a story that had a lot of positive moments moving forward.On a side note just a bit of advice; get some outside help with proofing and editing. It was a great story!

Jenessa Fontana: Spelling wasn't great but I enjoyed the story line

Shameen Naidoo: Very good Interesting storylineWanted to know if Christian and Maria got married

jhdm4me: Lovely heartwarming romantic book. Very good story

jonasiasmith05: I like how the main character was in a shitty relationship but then she found love where she was least expecting to. I would recommend this book to anyone that loves these types of stories and I gave it the rating I did cause the story is that good. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!!!!❤🥰🥰

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Stephanie Varea Fatiaki : I freaking loved it ❤️ every single thing about it 👌🏼 you are so talented 😍 i even suggested this to my partner 🤗🤗🤗

rutha8664: Like how his friend advised her. The guy is coward and full of shit.

Grace: Good mood today for the and the last one sec I thought you were going to be a little late but I'll be your friend and I are you from the bottom of my heart for

Chaitra Ramesh: It was a pretty neat story line with a slight deviation from the cliche characters, which I loved. The plot too was quite happening and not too corny. But it still maintained a warming feel to and didn't have any chapters where I wanted to quit... So over all it was a mediocre at it's besy

Robin Longenbach: It was a good read. Couldn't put it down.

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