I feel like drowning, run my fingers through my hair
Smoke fills my lungs, but I’m never ever there kill me I want to die, whispers in my ears no one is ever there no one ever really hears. Screams of terror fill the void but never leave my lips keep me with you don’t leave me even as the beat skips beautiful music only falls upon the deaf and the dead no matter how hard I try can’t get rid of the horrors in my head how can one be so incomplete inside dark rooms keeping to the corners, where to hide? Where to hide when you are all alone hide from myself, mirror image you’re all just another clone misinterpreted another distorted view Splinters throughout the fragile glass life tinted a greyish hue I need therapy but it’s just a phase fall upon the shattered remains my knees graze blood rises to the surface but I can no longer feel falling down my face invisible tears leak will I ever heal? Will I ever be real, be alive not this shell we have come so far already just bring me to hell I’m not me anymore humanity ate my personality see why I want to die thoughts yelling over the din of society don’t you dare ever lie to me don’t tell me you care draw me in intoxicate me infatuate me don’t play fair an entire page of words no one will ever read I hate myself and I hate people more I give warnings you will never heed I’m a butcherer I cut myself to pieces every night drawing myself together ready to face the next fight against myself see I’m my own worst enemy they said don’t worry self-hatred is just temporary everything is so very loud voices screaming in my skull life is a terminal illness to where death is the cure, how dull they say I’m schizophrenic a restless insomniac words keep me company I’m dead or dying people who used to support me screaming at my insanity hell if I know all your innermost thoughts 6 feet under I’m just bones by now a lonely corpse I’m telepathic we all hate each other kings and queens of fake smiles I’m ineffable in my predictability I think of you my mouth fills with bile I’m a walking horror story caffeine at 3am to keep my train of thought alive I don’t try to be relatable it just so happens that I’m human nothing is original a copy or a fake I’m just rearranged stardust obsidian someone end the thought process end me I cant deal with life someone please stab me in the chest multiple times with a knife I’ll be grateful I promise standing here in the twilight my body is in freefall and I’m in auto pilot.