Chapter 15 - It's none of my business
a/n: I feel like this chapter came out a little crappy...sorry :/
CHAPTER 15 - IT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS
When I got to school, for once in my life I wasn't even punctual, I was in advance! Why? Because I barely slept last night. Afraid as I was that my mind would restart playing games and drive me to sinful dreams of Eric Rivers. If anything, if there's someone I should dream of, that's Kyle. Not Mr. Bad Boy. Why the hell did I even do that? I mean, I don't feel attracted to him. Not at all. Yes, I do admit he is damn hot, but that doesn't mean I like him or even feel attracted. That's insane!
I just happened to spend an ... almost pleasant afternoon with him as he tried his best to hammer in mind things I'll never understand, I didn't just lay on the couch making out with him! So where the hell do these fantasies come from?!
Paula kept teasing me all day, saying it was useless to deny it, I just felt this unbelievable attraction towards the boy, a pull that wasn't worth fighting because it'd soon win. Bullshit. I am not, repeat not attracted to Eric Rivers. Not even in the slightest bit.
I nearly jumped when, upon unlocking my locker, I was startled to feel hands on my shoulders.
"There you are, Cookie!" Aisha greeted me, nearly pushing me against the lockers. I turned to her, only to be greeted by her usual cheery smile. I swear, I have never seen anyone this cheerful every moment of every day.
"Hi." I simply muttered, not really in the mood for chit-chatters, then turned around and opened my locker. I even have Creative Writing today, which means I have to them. See him. And I don't want to. How am I supposed to look at him like nothing when just the other night I dreamed of us ... doing that? How the heck am I supposed to react? Pretend nothing happened? Sure. But how? I was nervous before around him, imagine now. I already know I will be barely able to stand his intense gaze, well, worse than usual.
Gee, why the heck does my mind decide to play such games?! There is nothing that I feel or could ever feel for him, how the heck did my mind get to that? Yeah, ok, as a fangirl, I have a very fervid imagination, but to come to this! I've never had that kind of dreams. And to start with Eric even!
"What's up?" Aisha asked me, tilting her head to the side, clearly worried. I shrugged, shaking my head, saying it was nothing. How could I even explain to her that I simply had a wet dream about our school's bad boy?
Sure, I bet I'm not the only one, I mean, for how popular he is among girls, I bet many have literally dreamed of having him at least once, but that's them. Not me. I don't have such dreams. And sure as hell I don't feel attracted to Eric Rivers. Absolutely no.
Yeah, sure, repeating it makes it only less credible, Natalie ...
Aisha looked at me funny when I growled, hands in my hair, nearly pulling it, shaking my head as I muttered to myself curses I have never even used.
She placed a hand on my shoulder, giving me a concerned look and I sighed, distractedly glancing towards the entrance. Aisha and I were two of the very few kids already at school, most of the rest were starting to arrive just now.
And, among them, obviously, because I am so lucky, there was him. Walking down the hall in all his glory. He wore, as usual, dark blue jeans and a dark green t-shirt partly covered by an open grey hoodie. Much sportive. As usual.
Oh, but why am I even checking out his attire?! Why so I even care about what he wears or how hot he looks in those jeans and how the hoodie hides nothing of his muscles ... oh, God. I am nuts. Definitely.
Shaking my head once more, I barely saw Aisha frowning, but when I glanced back to the entrance, I saw he was approaching, and while I knew he wouldn't even spare a glance at me, imagine say hi, I instinctively hid behind my new friend, who giggled, just as he passed by. Just hope he didn't notice. There were other kids in the hall, maybe he didn't even see me. Hopefully.
"Oh, so you wanna avoid the stud there, huh? Why?" Aisha asked all giggly as she got rid of my grip and turned to me, giving me an impish grin that told me her thoughts about me and Eric together were all but clean. I violently shook my head, denying, but of course, she's persuasive, and I was about to budge and tell her ... hadn't the bell saved me in corner.
I dashed out of sight, apologizing, saying if I didn't move I'd be late for Physics, and left her there, but I hadn't considered I had to cross his path to get to my class, because, as usual, he was leaning against the wall just underneath the stairs I had to climb. Great. Just great.
I gulped when, a few steps away from my doom, I locked gazed with him. His eyes looked as icy as usual, and yet there was something ... maybe it was just my mind, too affected by that stupid dream, but it felt like he wasn't that unhappy to see me this time. Actually, he didn't even glare and I would have sworn there was a very light twitching of his jaw. Something like a tiny, really tiny, almost invisible, half smile. But it was just an hallucination, wasn't it? I mean, why on Earth would he ever smile at me?
Trying to act badass, I quickly reached the stairs, vehemently praying not to be clumsy and fall, but of course, am I ever lucky?
Maybe it's just that my mind was elsewhere and I was forcing myself not to look his way, but I tripped on my own feet and my face was about to greet the steps of the stairs, I was a few inches from them, when I felt strong arms holding me, keeping me from literally breaking my face.
My heart started racing, because even if I didn't understand why, I perfectly knew who it was to be holding me, and I had no will of facing him. I did look up at the spot he'd been previously, though, only to see the half surprised, half amused looks his pals were sending us.
"You should watch your steps." Eric's sexy husky tone filled my ears as he pulled me up, steadying me. My breath was heavy and I had no idea how to react, but I was thankful when he let go of me, quickly, but not enough not to let me feel he'd lingered in that touch a bit too long ... my imagination. Definitely.
Quite rudely, I didn't even say thank you, just sprinted away, climbing the stairs so fast that in less than five seconds I was already at my floor. I don't even want to know how did Eric take my reaction. I just know that when he grabbed me I was for a moment in his arms and I could smell his manly scent and it filled my nostrils, driving me insane. I could feel his lean muscles and I figuratively smacked myself over the head for even daring think of how comfortable it would have felt to rest on his hard chest.
I am not fighting any attraction. Believe me. I am not attracted to him. There's no irresistible pull. No unconscious denial. Nothing. It was just a dream. People dream all the time. Dreams are odd, but they don't always have a meaning ... right? Right?
Ok. Take a deep breath. Just because you're together in this class, doesn't mean you'll be close. As you can guess, I was trying to give myself enough courage to enter my Creative Writing class, the one I so luckily share with him.
Somehow, I've been able to avoid him all day, mostly because we never had the same classes, I even skipped lunch not to risk seeing him in the cafeteria.
I know, I'm being childish, but I just can't look at him, knowing I had such a dream ... when I reached my class, it was still open, but Mrs. Porter was already there. You can bet I was praying to God she wouldn't tell us to work on the fairy tale today.
Oh, no. The fairy tale. I'm gonna have to see him anyway. Possibly alone. Because of that darn project! Duh, here comes my luck! I sighed inaudibly as I entered. Keep calm. Considering we worked on it on Saturday, today should be Kyle's day ... right? I was even tempted to just claim I'll finish it myself and split the credits with them. Duh, I should have done that since the beginning. Why the heck did I think I could cope?
I scanned the room for a free seat, and luckily I found in the front, on the left. It would cause me to have to see him when he entered, but at least I would be sure to be far enough from him. I hope. I even almost sighed out of relief when I made it to my chosen seat without surprises. Cowardly, I kept my eyes on my desk all the time till the door was closed. If Eric entered, I didn't even know it.
Like she'd just woken up from a trance, Mrs. Porter took her eyes off her papers and gazed at us, taking in the whole class, like she normally does. "Well, hello everybody." She greeted, going to lean on the front of her desk. She smiled widely, clear sign she was in a good mood. Normally, she is like this when her husband finds time to take her to a romantic getaway, which means we get to work less. Yay. Maybe I'm safe.
"Some of you have already turned on the project and, I have to admit, I am quite stunned. Those couple of fairy tales I read were pretty good. I am proud." I could see, with the corner of my eyes, the girl beside me grinning, clear sign she was one of those the teacher had just indirectly complimented. I inhaled deeply, highly hoping we'd move on from the topic. But of course, I am never this lucky.
"Now, considering you seem to be pretty good, I have decided to accept Miss Tyler's suggestion ..." Oh, no. No. Miss Tyler was the responsible for the Drama class, which can only mean one thing ... "A few of your works will be portrayed in the recital due before Spring break. Not all of them, because it isn't obviously possible, so I'd say ... five out of ten. The half of it, well, pretty much."
There are nine groups for this project. Mine is the only one with three members, apparently my fault that I arrived late so got stuck with the last ones that hadn't chosen a partner yet. Now, I may still have a chance. If our work doesn't get chosen, I'm safe. If not ... although, if it's left to the Drama Club, then I might not have anything to do with the recital, I mean, as author ... "As authors, you will obviously be involved in the recital if your story is chosen."
Guardian angel, are you on vacancy today perhaps? Either that or you're the worst guardian ever existed.
Mrs. Porter beamed at us, once more taking in the class as she clapped her hands, like this was the best idea ever. Amazingly, I could even hear people seriously feeling excited about it. Normally I would to, I mean, one of my works gets the chance to be played in front of all school ... it's frightening and exciting at the same time, but if I've made my counts right, then it's not a good thing for me, because if our story is chosen, then I'll have to spend more time with who I want to avoid.
"You still have one week left to hand the project in. Do your best. Miss Tyler and I will be choosing the stories to play at the recital once we've read them all." Mrs. Porter exclaimed. Now I wish we'd done a much worse job. But no ... our work came out pretty good, if I say so myself. Even though it had to be finished. For how weird it sounds, I almost wish for it to come out as a real mess impossible to be read.
"Oh, and ... of course, if your story is chosen, it will obviously improve your mark. Of the 30%." I sighed, tuning her out as she kept on babbling about how this could be an important chance for those of us who take this course seriously and really want to become writers, which is my dream, and I should do my best to get this chance, not cower back just because I don't want to see one of my partners. I mean, getting the story to be played at the Spring recital means getting exposure and ... well, you know how it works, don't you?
Sighing, I leaned back in my seat. Lucky thing the teacher said we would work on other things now. Although, it's not that lucky, considering I'll have to see him outside of here. Possibly alone. Where my mind can more easily be hijacked and get me to hallucinate and think what I never would.
Somehow I made it throughout the school day without seeing Eric. Guess I have to apologize to my guardian angel, he wasn't that negligent after all today.
Almost relieved, once out of my last class, I headed to my locker, my peers already scattering around to get out. On my way to my destination, I bumped into Kyle, who I hadn't seen all day and looked, amazingly, pretty happy to see me. My heart obviously skipped a beat when he smiled brightly at me and we lost ourselves in some chit-chatter as he told me about his weekend, but unfortunately he had to run, having afternoon trainings, the new coach not being one to tolerate lateness.
Making me smile and my heart flutter, Kyle promised we'd catch up soon, possibly on Facebook tonight. Imagine my happy dance inside. I guess all of that fussing over a dream was worthless. I am not fighting any attraction. It was just a matter of having spent the afternoon with him alone.
As I headed to my locker, I passed by the janitor room, which just so happened to be cracked open and I could hear voices inside. I really didn't want to eavesdrop, but I was passing by and I could hear even without wanting to ... it was definitely a girl and a boy, they seemed to be arguing about something, but why hide to do that? Couldn't they do it in plain sight?
Oh, maybe they were lovers and didn't want her boyfriend or his girlfriend to know. Or maybe they're from different worlds and they don't want their friends to catch them, like ... I don't know, a football jock with one of the Physics team girls. Or maybe the opposite, a cheerleader with a nerd.
I snickered to myself as I walked past the door, not really wanting to know what they were talking about, but I froze in my spot when I recognized one voice, the male one, to be precise "Didn't we say it was over?" He asked. I gulped.
Of all people, right his conversation I had to eavesdrop? Now my feet didn't want to move and cold drops of sweat ran down my spine when I recognized the female voice as well: "It's never over between us, Eric. You know that."
He snorted. "Dana, I told you that ..." He didn't finish. I could picture her shutting him up with a kiss. So ... Eric and Dana, huh? Uh ... nice. I guess. It's not really my business, is it? I mean, he's free, they are free to date whoever they want. It's not like just because he was kind for one afternoon now we're friends and I have the right to tell him who to date. I absolutely have no right over him, I mean, his love life. It's ... his own. I don't get to decide. Neither do I have the right to feel sad and disappointed because he's dating ...wait, what?
Swallowing, I forced my feet to move, but I once more heard their voices. I didn't fail to notice it had taken them more than a few seconds to restart talking and, I guess, to part their lips, which gave me an odd sensation I'll blame on the meatloaf I ate at lunch.
"You don't stand a chance with her. Why keep chasing her?" Dana asked, her tone as gentle as I've never heard it.
He sighed. "I am not chasing her. Neither do I want anything from her." He replied, tone clearly distressed but not angry.
"Then why ..."
"I can't change my feelings, Dana. God knows I've tried." I didn't hear anything for a moment. What does he mean he can't change his feelings? For who? Wow. Here I am, believing, like the whole school, that he doesn't even have a heart, and instead he is in love. Apparently with some girl that doesn't reciprocate.
It's none of my business. None of my business. Once more I forced myself to move and this time I succeeded, luckily, because I'd just made a few steps when the door opened completely. I was enough far not to be noticed or look like I didn't hear anything. So I rushed out of the school, trying not to bother. After all why should I? Certainly it's none of my concern.
And yet ... nah. It's nothing. Just this odd feeling for having just busted such an odd couple. Nothing more. The bite might be similar, but it's not the green monster, I can assure you.
I am, in no way, jealous. Absolutely not. There is no way in Hell I might ever be jealous of Eric Rivers.
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