1 Year Later..
I never thought I’d ever say this about a school, but I missed it. Summer break wasn’t boring or anything, I really needed the time off. A break away from everyone and everything, a time to just sort out what I’ve been feeling. But school often distracts me from those thoughts of anxiety and all of these changes. So it’s good to be back.
“Ah, I been missin’ you girl!” Paige exclaims, throwing her arms around me before I can even step foot in our apartment. “How you been?”
Patting her on the back I quickly remove myself from her arms, beginning to have a difficult time breathing. “Summer was fine, Cathy moved in. How was your trip to Arkansas?”
“Eh, it was alright,” She shrugs. “Kinda bored most of the trip.”
“Oh, well at least you got to see family.”
“Guess so, anyways, what you do most of the summer?” Paige calls out over her shoulder, hauling one of my suitcases to the nearest bedroom.
Try and pretend like everything was normal for once, that Dad hadn’t ever gone to rehab and Cathy never moved in. That mom was still alive, and Isaac was around. That Gavin wasn’t dead and my heart wasn’t torn into pieces.
Hating Isaac will never get me anywhere, but at this point, he’s the only person I can think to really project my all of my pent up aggression towards. During the summer I spent a lot of time thinking about him, about us. About what he told me, how it turned out to be nothing but a lie. I’m not bitter because he left, I’m bitter because he told me he was going to stay. That he has completely removed me from his life..
But I’m happy to say that I’ve gotten to a point where I have come close to accepting the fact that he’s just never going to come back. Although if I could thank him for one thing, is that he taught me a lesson, keeping your walls up, will eventually kill you inside; handling it with others makes the pain more bearable.
There really isn’t a day he doesn’t cross my mind, but those emotions and feelings I had for him.. I feel it’s safe to say they are gone. But the ache he left in the friendship we created, will always be there.. I just have to fill it with other things, that’s all I can do.
“You scarin’ me standin’ there like that.”
“All depressed, like you got your head in the clouds or somethin’ of the sort,” she comments, slightly cocking her head to the side. “you good?”
“Come on, be for real, are you okay?”
Lifting my shoulder in a half shrug, I stare down at the floor, unsure of how to answer this. After a moments reflection I reply, “I will be.”
He pulls me into a tight hug and I return it happily, we pull away from each other and he walks beside me as I head in the direction of the nearest Subway. Trevor’s social worker worked hard just to allow him to be able to get into university. I hope he doesn’t throw this opportunity away.
“So, how you been?” He asks, opening the door for me.
Why does everyone keep asking me that?
“I’m fine, glad to see you’re here.” I respond, digging around in my handbag. “Paige and I weren’t sure if you were coming or not, you seemed pretty nervous when we last talked.”
Scratching the back of his neck, he meets my gaze. “Your girl Heidi talked to me, basically told me I gotta get on my A game if I wanna get off the streets. So here I am.”
“Proud of you,” I acknowledge, smiling. “You’re doing the right-”
“Uh uh, miss me with that emotional sh*t, I ain’t gonna deal with all that.” He interjects, failing to suppress his grin.
I roll my eyes with a smirk, shaking my head. “Sorry forgot, you’re this “tough guy” don’t do sentimental stuff. I get it.”
He winks at me, nudging my shoulder. “See you catchin’ on quick - nice talking to you and all but I gotta go hit up this chick, so meet up with you later?”
Before I can get a word out he’s already hurrying after a red haired girl on her way out the door. He really is somethin’ else. Chuckling I step in line preparing to order my sub, feeling a lot more happier than I have in a while.