By the time that we reached New Orleans my palms were sweaty.
"I don't want to do this." I said. He looked over. "It's not up to you, they deserve to know that you are alive." He said. His voice was cold and unsympathetic.
"It was a choice that I made. If they think that I'm dead, good. I didn't want to stay and I didn't want to go. Think about it, if I had stayed, I would have found out I was pregnant and you would have known sooner." I said.
"I thought you made your choice to stay." He mumbled lowly.
"I had, but then it was difficult with the break up and us getting back together. I needed a fresh start. Dad helped me. How's Cody doing at running the gang anyway?" I questioned.
"Why do you think your here? Cody's dead." He said. I only nodded.
"Huh, I gave him four years, Anna and Renee gave him ten They owe me twenty each." I shrugged. "You bet on him?" He questioned, shooting me a glare. I nodded.
"What did you not expect me to have some fun?" I questioned.
"So you told them that you were going to stay?" I shrugged.
"Told them I was thinking about it."
"How has raising triplets been going?" He asked with a knowing smirk. I sighed. "It was easy since Sam had been there for me the first two years but after he left it was a lot quieter. We use to argue, especially after," I paused. "After Tessie died." I said with a sigh. His eyes narrowed.
"Who was Tessie?" He questioned.
"Tessa Jacobs Loens. Loens was Sam's last name. She had a genetic birth defect called ventricular septal defect. VSD for short. Basically she had a whole in her heart. I was told to stay on bedrest for the remainder of my pregnancy but one day, well Sam was at work, the kids were at home with me, just playing in my room and talking with her. Next thing someone tries to grab Alex in the apartment, I ignored the fact that Tessie needed me on bedrest and I went after him. He let go of Alex and pushed me into the counter before running. Next thing I know doctors were telling me to push. And Tessie was stillborn. Sam blamed me for his daughters death and after a couple months he left." I said, I didn't shed any tears because I had grown use to it. I knew that Tessie was dead but it didn't stop there. The kids were so sad once I told them that Tessie had to go to heaven early. Just an easy way to tell them that she wasn't there."
"I'm sorry." He said.
"It's fine. I didn't really want another kid but Sam wanted. I think maybe he just wanted me to have the baby so he could take it. I wouldn't have mind but loosing a child was hard." I said. We finally parked and a guy instantly appeared at the door.
"Sorry precaution so that you won't run." He said and unbuckled.
"You should know I wouldn't leave without my kids." I said and opened my door. I opened the back and helped the kids out of their car seats. Alex, stay next to mommy." I said and held out my hand for him to grab. I noticed that Carsyn was finally asleep. She had barely slept for some reason the trip so I gently unbuckled her and wrapped her arms around my neck.
She grasped my neck and snuggled closer to me as I picked her up. Ryder held out his hand for me to take. I ignored the perfect fit of his hand in mine and let go nearly immediately.
"Alexander hold Ryder's hand, Owen, hold mine." I said and we began walking the familiar roads.
"Mommy, I don't feel good." Carsyn whispered in my ear. I nodded.
"We will get you some much needed rest when we see your grandma and grandpa." I said and kissed her cheek.
We rounded the corner into an alleyway and stopped at the metal door. I knocked three times before it was opened.
"Ashtyn Victoria Gray." I announced.
"Identification." The man said. I turned around and held up my hair for him to look at the crown tattoo. "Enter, Welcome home Ashtyn." He said. I nodded. It hadn't changed much. We had it renovated on the inside. People rushed around like normal but everyone stepped inside.
"Ashtyn follow me." Ryder said, picking up the pace as he picked up Alex. I picked up Owen, still with Carsyn in my arms. I could feel her head moving around, gazing at the room.
I followed Ryder up the stairs until we came to a stop at a large door. It was my families quarters. Large yes, but we had several other people living with us so we split off and created our own little places, ours being the biggest of course. Without knocking I took a breath and opened the door.
Inside was our sitting room, it held several different couches with a large screen tv. I could tell that something was up because they didn't look up when I entered the room.
"What are they doing?" I questioned. My father sat facing towards us, with them all huddled with their back towards us.
Renee, Anna, Mom and Dad all were there.
"Do you not remember the date?" He questioned. Shit. It was December 7th. The day Ashtyn Gray died.
"I need your guy's attention." Ryder suddenly announced.
Everyone's head snapped towards mine, my father's eyes narrowed at the sight of me.
"No it can't be." My mom said through the tears. I gently set Owen down, he grasped my hand and hid behind me.
"Hi Family." I said smiling sheepishly. "Renee and Anna, you each owe me twenty dollars." I laughed cautiously.