Slipping in and out of consciousness. Footsteps. I try to scurry away, but they keep coming. Closer and closer. Louder and louder. The creak of the handle turning. The bang of the door against the wall. I cower in the corner, afraid of what’s to come.
The luminescent light from the hall creates a vast, black shadow, the same color of Ma’am’s heart. I flinch when the face of my torment comes into view. Her ripe, red rage can be scented from a mile away. Gazing down at her shoes, I notice the woman is in her formal attire as per usual. Her compelling grass-green eyes regard me with contempt, and her scowling, plum painted lips sink further down. She glares down her nose, but I can see that I evoke her interest.
As she lessens our separation, the foul smell of stale cigarettes mixed with expensive perfume stings my nostrils. When she tilts back, the lamp’s muted glow caresses her skin, making the angle of her jaw look both sharper and softer.
The aggressiveness rolls off her in waves and splashes me square in the chest. I endure the familiar anxiety overtake me, feel the dimly lit room enclose me. The lump in my throat enlarges and my pulse skyrockets. Thump. Thump. Her enigmatic countenance and sharp orbs makes me violently tremble in fear. Upon looking deeper into her eyes, I spot a bright hue in the midst of midnight. Her darkness isn't noticeable without light to create contrast, and I was the light. An impulse to run rushes over me, but there is no way to escape. She knows it. I know it.
I’m not like most children. I’m not like anybody. Very few go through what I do, and most can’t even imagine it, but this is my reality. I know it's wrong.
A prodigious shiver rolls through me, making me tuck my shaking hands between my unhealthily, thin thighs and huddle close to the wall. When I look up, she stiffly strides into the room, bringing iniquity with her. Ma’am stands over a foot taller than me, her sleek, black heels making her impossibly high. From where I crouch on the ground, she is an immense beast. The look she shoots me pins me in place, and I realize I have nowhere to go. I feel cornered like prey that’s about to be ripped limb from limb and devoured. As I look around the boxy room, the same unease floods my belly. Knowing what’s coming, I bow my head, the fight leaving me, and submit.