The girl that does everything in her power to fit in , to feel loved , to be known of only good things .
But it seems like no one likes her because what ever that she tries to do , does not please anyone . It's like she is this kid that is not from Earth therefore everyone treats her in a bad manner. I don't know if it's her attitude that makes people to treat her this way or what . But for me her attitude is just fine .
She's always quiet around people but if you know her , you know her.
Most people "assume" that she doesn't like people, she has this "don't mess
with me face". But see that's the thing about her , she's different.
You can call her .. an introvert, she doesn't like to share her problems for people to help her , no . She'd rather suffer & keep her problems to herself cause at the end of the day no one seems to care at all.
She is this tall , melanin female .
Friends? Some are real , some are fake but that's life.
She found someone that "finally" loves her , okay let us not say love but .. he likes her . But since no one ever likes her or even have feelings for her , she has a soft spot for this guy but at the same time she doesn't like him. Its complicated right ? But that's how it is.
Then there's this other guy. The guy? I had a very very HUGE crush on him. Did he know that I had a thing for him? Yes , yes he did I once confessed well maybe not once, but he knew I made sure of that. I thought the feeling was mutual but you know what? I thought wrong lmao! It is not a laughing matter but then hey , I'm way past that "crush". I started talking to the guy around March 2018 I don't excatly remember the date but it was around March. By that time I wasn't interested in him to be honest? I just wanted to prove a point to someone that's all , he was all flirty , that's when I started to like him not knowing that he does this to every female that gets his attention. Months went by , he started video calling me often.. I was flattered honestly.The year 2019, that is when I told him how I feel about him & he said "I don't wanna date anyone anymore because i get hurt alot" I almost promised him the world because I was soo madly in love with him & he didn't see that. Okay , I let that slide because I didn't wanna lose whatever that we "had" so I kept being in contact with him as...I don't know? Friends? But I wouldn't declare myself as his friend because pssssh , wow. The year 2020, February to be specific.. he came with his friends to my school. I didn't expect them by the way , I was surprised , honestly. He came to me... oh! before that part I accompanied my friend to go buy something so apparently he was that side ,he just said " do you see what you're doing" & I just kept on going forward. Back to the part that we've all been waiting for ; he came to me.. by the time he approached me I was with my "stoner friends" bare in mind I wasn't involved in any of the things they were doing they're just.. good company. He approached me then he was like "what you're doing to me isn't cool but its okay." I didn't even take him seriously because he knows what he's doing but at the end of the day he pins the whole situation on me.
Later that day I posted his picture on my Whatsapp status , then one of my classmates commented "your man" on the post so I took a screenshot then I sent it to him, his response was some laughing emojis & a little heart then he was like "she's right though". I know he only said that because he was eventually happy.. of what? I don't know. He even had the nerve to send me a voice message saying "please tell me what's going on"
knowing very well that he's just playing me! Fast forward to a couple of days further , I went to visit one of my greatest friends in his neighborhood. It was on my birthday by the way , he didn't even wish me a happy birthday I had to remind him. By the way , for me to finally see that the guy isn't into me I got to see on that particular day. Most of the time he posts girls on their birthdays wishing them a happy birthday but then , on mine? He never did such a thing but anyway , I let that slide too. Moving on , currently he is not speaking to me anymore. I don't know if his game changed & I'm not in any level of that game or what but hey , he just changed.
But I guess that's how it is , you win some you lose some that's how the dice rolls. I have accepted that he did not , in anyway love me. He just loved the fact that I love him & that's that.
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